[ open ] If you do what you always did...

[darkcharge]

Who: Vanitas + Open
When: Throughout Mareuer
Where: All around
What: Quest Prompts and semi-open prompts
Warnings: Mentions of last month's event


( Scarring ) - open to close CR ; Beginning of month

[ For the first week after Vanitas had returned home, he really hadn't left bed much. His body had been healing and recovering from the events of the previous month. He hadn't felt much up to doing anything or talking to anyone. There had been a lot that Vanitas had been dealing with internally as well. He had been beating himself up for being too weak and for allowing his guard to drop. Blamed himself for his circumstances and busted wrist. Screaming and having fits in the middle of the night to the point where he'd try to slip away and try to find a place where the voices aren't so loud.

The following few weeks are better, but not by much. Vanitas still hasn't been sleeping well, but he is roaming about the house. Maybe he makes it to the front porch and around the yard, but that's where he stops. For now. If anyone asks, he snaps at them. Vanitas may very well pretend that nothing is wrong and everything is fine. He's defensive, closer to how he had been a year ago. It makes him sick, but he can't stop himself from lashing out a bit.

Because he's fine. He should be fine. So why isn't he? ]


( Gerard's Gardening )

[ Now after about a week into the month, Vanitas can't stand it any more. He doesn't need to be treated with care so he's going to show people that he's fine and that they need to pay attention to themselves and not worry about what he's doing.

Which leads him to where he is right now, planting some seeds. It's a task he's actually done a lot since he's been here and is more familiar with plants than he cares to be sometimes. Anyone watching for a lesson might see - ]

I'll show you how it's done. The right way.

[ Which means Vanitas digging his fingers into the soil. Sprouts magically rise from the flower bed and begin to bloom. He pulls back soon after. ]

Anything more than that and you'll kill them.

[ He's totally done this before. ]


( Birds of a Feathered Cap )

[ Sure, one could probably look for feathers in the city but everyone's going to be doing that, right? Hence Vanitas can be found right outside the wall. It's likely an odd sight, seeing him pace around the area - checking out vegetation and even going so far as to climbing some trees. Looking for nests, of course. They're bound to have feathers as well. ]

You can get lost. I can handle it.

[ This is his job. He doesn't need your help ]


( Curiouser Cats )

How often do these Chimeras run off... I swear there was another incident like this.

[ He's mostly grumbling to himself. This brat's run off and whatever. Vanitas is pretty sure he can track the child down. Without help. Though if pressed he'll motion to the Flood at his side and say that this is all he needs. It's like he's trying to prove to someone - mainly himself - that he's not weak. That Vanitas is still the same as he had been.

Hopefully he won't go out there and get overwhelmed by the Caitagàire.

Even so, he's pushing on - with or without you - into the woods proper with his Keyblade strapped onto his back. ]

Need a bell or something on these kids.


( Wildcard )

[ You know what to do. If you want to plot just hit me up on plurk at jardaan! ]

Comments

[darkcharge]

Oh I see. Couldn't even be bothered to make me something yourself, hmm?

[ Even with his shaky tone, he's attempting to make jokes. Mean jokes, but jokes all the same.

His gaze shifts and focuses more on the food that is being placed before him. A stew? Where had Yona found the ingredients to do this? Or had she just made do with what she could find here? ]

Let me guess. You were such a good little girl you ate it despite the flavor.

[darkestbefore]

No, I only wished to not make you more ill, honestly.

[ She laughs at her own expense, not sounding like she minds his dig. She knows where her skills lay, and at cooking, she's still very much a novice, save for a few dishes here and there.

But she smiles wryly as she settles comfortably at his side, one leg crossing under her as she perches on the edge of the bed, careful not to shift the tray at all. ]

Mmm, I did eat it all, yes, but it was more than that... he went to the trouble of making it when he was so busy. It had nothing to do with wanting to be good and more... just being so happy I got to see him, that he still came to check on me. As terrible as it might have been, it was still a way for him to show that he cared about me. A gesture of love.

[darkcharge]

[ Well Yona needs to at least give Vanitas the bowl so that he might be able to actually make an attempt to eat. If she thinks that she will be feeding him... Um. No. That would be embarrassing and he doesn't want to give anyone the impression that he's someone that can't take care of himself. ]

Where is he now? I know you ran away, right?

[ Vanitas has never really bothered to ask details before. They hadn't really been all that important when he had first met her. ]

[darkestbefore]

[ She'd just handed the bowl to him, passing it into his hands as he asks his question. Which is lucky, because her fingers go numb as a chill races through her and she pales abruptly in response.

Withdrawing her hands back to her lap, she hesitates, fingers twisting around one another before she forces out a reply. ]

Dead.

[ For all that her voice is quiet, there's an edge in the tone, lost somewhere between grief and anger. Turbulent emotions that haven't abated, despite the passage of time. ]

He... The night I fled, he was murdered.

[ Clearly not your typical cheerful almost-breakfast talk, but... ]

[darkcharge]

[ It had been an innocent enough question. However the answer is not. Vanitas holds the bowl for a moment, noticing her reaction to the question. He already knows what the answer is going to be before she even says it.

There's really no reaction from him. How could there be? Vanitas doesn't have parents. The closest he has to relatives would be likely Sora, Ventus... By extension Xion and Roxas. There's nothing else really. Thus how can he understand what loss is and grief? He doesn't. And instead of pretending that he does and offering words, he just stays silent. Van is quiet as he has this soup that he can't entirely taste now. ]

No thoughts of revenge?

[ Which would be his immediate thought. Someone took something of his so he'll take something of theirs in return. ]

[darkestbefore]

[ Her lips press together for a moment before she lifts her shoulder in a small shrug. ]

I... haven't decided yet. I thought so, at first. I can't say, even now, that I wouldn't seek it, given the right opportunity.

But I still don't understand it. Why he... the man who killed my father was one of my closest friends. Someone I loved dearly. He was... [ She pauses, tries to find the right words for the complicated mess left in the wake of Soo-Won's betrayal. ] It was something none of us saw coming. He'd always been so kind and warm. The man I faced that night was neither of those things. It was like I was looking at a stranger.

More than revenge, I want to know why.

[darkcharge]

People are like that, Yona. When they have a goal in mind and are capable of doing what is necessary to obtain that goal? I doubt that someone like you can fully understand it.

[ He shrugs, still working his way through his soup. ]

Desperation. The belief that only by committing these actions or by behaving a certain way will get you what you want. It's so important that nothing else matters and nothing else will matter.

[darkestbefore]

[ Her fingers clench in her lap at that, her lips pressing into a thin line. ]

Even beyond reason?

[ It's not that she doesn't know what Vanitas describes. She's seen so many forms of desperation in her journeys that she knows exactly what it can force people into. What she'd been forced into, a time or two. But the cost had always been to her - had it been otherwise, she'd like to think she would have looked for another path.

She shakes her head, sighing quietly. ] Maybe I won't be able to understand his reasons. But I still want to try. If I don't, if I only pursue my own vengeance, doesn't that make me as blind as I feel he is?

[darkcharge]

Even beyond reason. [ Van sets the bowl down for a moment. ] I chose nonexistence over being incomplete. Think about that for a moment.

[ Because when something really matters to someone and they feel like the losses do not outweigh the gains? Or maybe they feel as though there is nothing to be lost? Then yes, they really will do everything in their power. Morality isn't really something that exists. All that matters is meeting the goal. Obtaining the prize... ]

Nothing wrong with trying to understand, but acknowledge when you can't. I don’t know if that makes you as blind as he is. I just know that’s how I would respond and I do not find fault in it.

[darkestbefore]

[ His words give her pause and she considers him for a long moment - both in his advice about Soo-Won and what he reveals about himself at the same time.

After a long moment, she reaches out to rest her hand on his knee. ]

Thank you. I think I needed to hear that. [ A pause, before she offers him a crooked smile. ] And for what it's worth? I'm really glad you exist.

[darkcharge]

[ During that pause, Vanitas finds time to continue eating. At least he can hold this down. It's almost a novel concept at this point. The fact that he is feeling strong enough for a heavy conversation like this is... Well it is improvement. ]

You needed to hear that you're a bit soft? [ He scoffs a bit while looking at the hand on his knee. ] I guess that you would.

[ Van sighs, listening to the other part of her words. ]

You and a lot of people seem to share both sentiments.

[darkestbefore]

No. I needed to hear another perspective. [ She gives him a rueful smile. ] Even that can help better my understanding, so I appreciate it.

Are you surprised by that? [ She cocks her head to the side to study his expression. ]

[darkcharge]

A little. Rather, I keep being surprised at how weird you are for a princess.

[ For considering other opinions and perspectives outside of her own. Demanding to participate in battles and refusing to leave Vanitas well enough alone. There are a lot of little things that she does that contradict Van's view of what a princess is. ]

[darkestbefore]

[ She blinks for a moment, surprised by his answer, before breaking into soft laughter. ]

Well, I will take that as a compliment instead. I'd rather be much more than that, if I can.

[darkcharge]

Much more than weird?

[ Vanitas hums, quietly tapping the spoon against his bottom lip. ]

I don't know if that's really possible.

[ Teasing. It means his mood is better at least? ]

[darkestbefore]

[ Her mouth drops open, because he's so rarely teased her in the past that it takes her by complete surprise. But she's quick to catch on and a moment she's giving in to a bubble of delighted laughter - and a little relieved that he's feeling well enough to make jokes now. ]

I meant more than just being a princess and you know it.

[darkcharge]

[ Now now. Vanitas teases plenty! Usually it's more mean-spirited teasing than something that's clearly meant to be more "friendly." Light. ]

Tch. Well if that's all then you've set that bar pretty low, don't you think?

[darkestbefore]

[ She likes this version better.

But she just grins at his comment, lifting her hands in a playful shrug. ]

We've all got to start somewhere, right?