middaeg | Aguril catchall

[That face hidden in the reeds winces and there's a lovely squelch as her leg shifts. Mud...Horrible goopy wet mud. They'd touched worse in their lives, and her chitin meant she couldn't feel it as much as if it was on skin but still, gross.

Her wings gave another flicker, small specks of colour in their wake as she gave herself a little air before she got stuck. Moving further up the small bank and into the grass.]

I noticed before when I stood on you...[Not that she'd thought much at the time. It's just been a good spot to take a moment to work out how to avoid his spines when she'd climbed onto him. And later she'd been too consumed with dumping paint on his head to care.] Were they feral or did you start it?

[Look, he had a bad habit of starting fights.]

[ a click of teeth hitting each other is followed by— to huffs, one after another. irritation hadn’t been its cause, but instead . . . the weakness of a muffled laugh that would never truly be a laugh, both from his waning mood and general inability to find something to genuinely laugh about. this, this just felt ironic. and a little nostalgic, to the point that when he exhales at its end, sadness creeps into his settling eyes that he’s rather easily mask by closing them and getting some rest. ]

Both. [ they were feral, and, eren started it. tiredly, his tail flops, and the rest of the dragon turns into his side like a resting dog. ] I need another witch Bond.

[ he is a big boy, with a big appetite, and one hadn’t been cutting it for him since december. ]

Looks like you’re okay, though.

[Ah...That...It gets a slump from her where she was hiding. Her mouth opening and closing as she hesitates on answering for a moment. A long, drawn-out breath slipping out.]

...Do I? [Because she didn't feel okay. She felt tired, the adrenaline from finally being free of gravity fading now she was still. But...She didn't want to mention that, not how she felt so tired that it seemed to seep into her bones. Making it hard to wake up with how little energy she was getting. How her normal exercises seemed more difficult by the day.]

I don't have one. [It's none of her thoughts on that, just stating a fact. She'd need to find a witch before long, but that was easier said than done.]

[ ooffff that was MY BAD since i thought mikasa had gotten one at this point but it’s cool, we’ve got this. eren’s eyes, or at least one of them, crack open. how has she been here, since february? six months without a witch bond and she’s still this lucid? eren considers the possibilities, but doesn’t voice them. they’re all obvious ones. ]

You still get magic from somewhere. [ like he does when one bond is too little. ] I hope you find one, though.

[The wings draining what little magic she could get from Tendou and potions too rapidly, that was the final kick into getting a witch.
Tendou...Tendou helped, giving her a mental nudge or inquiry when her thoughts went places. There was a limit to how much he could reign her in, especially with the lack of magic.]

I go to the Coven... All the witches I know are gone. [Well not all of them. But all the ones she knew that remained were...like she'd been. They had issues with bonding.

As she speaks, the faint flecks of colour running through her wings dies. Not even enough magic to sustain that. The urge to fly dwindling with it.] You need...more...?

[Then it descended into chirps and chitters. Wings stirring up again, droning as she backed up further, appearing for a short moment before falling back into the water so only her head was visable.]

[ as mikasa’s wings fluttered, so did eren‘s eyes. they felt heavy, and resting them . . . wouldn’t hurt. the night still chirped with crickets and frogs, or had that been her? maybe the occasional bird that signaled sunrise in another hour or so. maybe more. maybe it was his head, too. ]

I’ve always needed a lot of magic.

[ that was something he came to aefenglom with, something made worse on the first month he spent here, and then— it grew as much as he did. ]

It’s going to be one year and two months since I’ve been here.

[The fae was resting, or wilting. It was hard to tell. She'd just keep paddling, feeling just as weightless in the water as she did with her gear when it'd been possible to use. Lacking the energy to really fly for now.]

I eat more here too. [He might have heard of her woes there in passing. Mentioning it to Mettaton and Momo on the network. But even with the amount she ate, there was still a hunger. The same as back during those days after the wall fell.] Eight months...

[Her eight months was a long time, his fourteen months? When he'd only had three years to live before? It was an age.

There's a noise, bubbling around her neck where air escaped the chitin there. Something Mikasa didn't think about as she let herself drift. The awkward silence dragging for a moment, another small splash in the bushes from a fish or frog. Not big enough to make her look.]

Six months...That's all it took before. We graduated, got to the basement. [So much had changed, so quickly. So much movement, it felt still and stagnant here.]

. . . It flew. [ time, he meant. the dragon’s torso inflates and deflated with a sigh that makes some nearby mud mold, and the water’s he faced ripple. ] And it’ll keep flying.

[ it was a grim conclusion to come to, but the truth. he’d be truly dead in three years or less (possibly less, considering the death he did have—) ]

It’s . . . Ironic, sometimes. How this world works. [ he looks to the moons with a cracked eye, his breathing still as present as any large creature. ] If I don’t die by anything else, I’ll outlive every witch. Every monster.

[ he’d live maybe for centuries and didn’t know how to feel about that when his life had a set time already since the beginning. before he was born, maybe. sometimes his mind would wander to what he’d do with that time. what would he do? the people he’d lose were inevitable, a part of the cycle that had less to do with tragedy (what everyone could hope for, but eren doesn’t allow himself to trust in) and more with just the natural journey of things. it’s why he’s lifted any shackles that could permanently tie him to others, enjoy them while he could when anything could happen. the bony flaps of his wings give a shift, and with part of what felt like a whisper in the night, but still as loud as the wind: ]

Except you.

[The ripples reach her. Vibrating through the water and to those vein filled wings, the antenna filled with nerves. Enough to notice the small things here. Making her still and settle in the water as she floated.]

...Except me. [Questioning, maybe. Mikasa wasn't so sure herself. Back home the subject of how long Eren had to live had came up. His time was limited, she'd even offered to limit her own time after. But ignoring that, would either of them even last the three years before that?

The chances seemed pretty low now.

But here. In this city. It wasn't something she'd thought of. Sowilo's anger at being asked about things, if she'd thought he was thousands of years old. Stan, the elderly dragon who mentioned being older than the walls she'd known. She'd known that some creatures lived longer than back home, hell, humans lived longer here.

But she hadn't applied that to herself... It was hard to tell, with her eyes being solid black now, but her gaze moved. Looking at the ground below the dragon's feet(paws) where he's talons sunk into the softer soil. The idea of living for so long...It really hadn't occurred to her. She'd already had to deal with that unease knawing at her insides as she watched Eren and Armin, the knowledge that no matter what she did, they'd both be gone within the next ten years. She wouldn't be alone. She had the others, though Sasha's death had been a horrible reminder of just how easy it was to lose someone. And here? She'd potentially have to deal with that for so much longer.

For a moment she forgets herself. Almost sinking until she paddles close enough that her feet sunk into the sandy dirt at the bottom of the pond. Still enough water to hide in, but not enough for her to tire from moving.]

You seem so sure...

[Unlike her. She'd gotten less and less sure the more things happened.]

How we age here is a fact. [ how they died was another story, and the possibility of it happening existed just like everyone else, but he figured that hadn't been the actual topic. as eren speaks, there seems to be no conflict; there never was. ] We're not human anymore— or Eldian.

[ their connection the paths were severed. they're no longer a part of that world as long as they remain here. something so many struggled with and eren . . . hadn't. becoming a dragon had never felt alien and only more comfortable and natural as time passed with him here. where so many struggled with their humanity, their appearance, eren nurtured less importance. perhaps because he never actually cared about what he looked like, and being a shifter hadn't cushioned the experience of being a monstrosity. ]

Unless that wasn't what you meant.

I thought the longest that anyone has been here was fourteen months. [It's dry, lacking any bite. Just making a comment, as if it were the weather. No one had been here for long enough if the changes went that deep. If they'd affect one's lifespan...She wasn't sure what to make of that.

Her own thoughts on being a monster... Were complicated. To say the least, the aches and pains were annoying but that was all. There had been a strange delight at her own wings coming through. Being able to fly without relying on gas or the mechanics which could fault.

What she didn't like. Was how useless she felt at times, how she couldn't do things that had been so easy before. The unnerving thought that she was like those creatures she'd seen way back in the old jungle. But she still felt like her.

The fae floundered in her new spot, wings giving a pointless flicker. Moving water around. Throwing the excess off before it could slowly trickle down and be annoying.]

[ on one hand, she has a point, and on the other, it was a little flighty to ignore what they were becoming and every piece of information he's received from elders, from experience, from the world and more, that— it'd be silly to keep thinking he was what he used to be. maybe by core, but he's an eren divergent of the world they've come from. ]

I can tell you right now I'm not going back home to live. [ did she know that? and people who've died, well. aefenglom has been where wayward souls were pulled to. he wondered why it hadn't been all of them, but then again . . . this world was just as large as the last one, and aefenglom, talam, it was a grain compared to the rest. the moons are dropping closer to the horizon line, and on the other side of the sky is a hue of blue and purple, only now beginning to brighten. ] I guess we'll see, [ his shoulder rolls as he brings his feet to support his weight. ] or not.

[She had so many reservations. About what she was turning into, how no one seemed to know what to make of her changes or offer any real help with them. It was best to be open to the ideas instead of believing firmly in one thing. Wasn't it?

The dragon's comment though, that didn't sit right with her. Earning a small hiss. A small hum as her wings buzzed again, remaining spread and sticking out of the water, showing their dull magic. Reflecting the dawn's light off of the fine membrane.]

You're not going back? [At all? That was it? He was breaking the walls back home and then..?

Hiding away here? Waiting to see if he'd live hundreds of years like some monsters did?]

[ she should listen to the words carefully, so he offers them, again and with a swallow that feels dry: ]

To live. I know I’ll go back eventually. [ but it just didn’t feel like . . . it was for long, and what life did await him, if he didn’t miraculously kick it in the end? and why was it, that he keeps talking rather than sparing her? was it to just make things clear or—? he’s already started, and not answering would just leave so many holes when he swore he’d no longer dig them. ] You didn’t see what happened. That’s why you’re hopeful.

[ that they would be able to do something, and maybe they all would— but it wouldn’t be happy. no horror story is. ]

[The hissing tapers, but the wings remained raised. That did not fully appease her. Then slowly the wings lowered, only a little, as her shoulders fell. Giving a small buzz and bubble of water as they arranged themselves.

That was the issue wasn't it? If Eren was right and the rumbling didn't happen, the rest of the world would come down on them. If they hadn't been before, they would be after Libero. Hell, even without the rest of the world, the higher-ups had been wanting to get Eren's titan to someone else. Someone they could control.

And if the rumbling was successful? Then what? There was Floch and Eren's other supporters, he might have been able to live. But he didn't think so.

She remained silent.]

...Is that why you talked about life here? [It's slow. Trying to order her thoughts.] Because of how long we could be here?

[She...she really didn't think they'd have that long. Too many unknowns. Like back home, people could vanish just like that. Or even more suddenly. And even if they could vanish in a moment, Eren was saying they could potentially be here for hundreds of years.

She'd been trying not to get too invested in the city and the inhabitants. Though she was failing to some degree, Tendou, Tater, Mettaton...A few friends who'd already left with no chance of a goodbye.]

What will you do? If you live that long? [And outlive everyone you cared about? It was something she'd already resigned herself to. Even if not fully, she'd still had no idea what she'd do once Eren and Armin were gone. But there wasn't anything she could do to stop them.]

[ the dragon's breathing, a massive, raggedy shake against bones, is inhaled and held as he rights himself, looks to nothing, but sees everything: misplaced.

he knew what he wanted in his heart but he'd question time and time again, was that truly a possibility or just some raging fever dream? how could anyone, especially mikasa, want to live with him again? why would anyone live with him at all? "because i like you" isn't something he could change, but it didn't mean he didn't still question it. ]

I don't know . . . Where to start. [ it was so much easier said than done. when eren had his charges of confident energy and resolute certainty, he'd say i'll live the life i was born to live, but what kind of life was that? another of violence? it was a choice that haunted him and compelled him to the point that he would always think he'd choose it over peace. that, or almost always, but was almost any better? it was a lie to comfort a shattered piece of glass heart that was barely keeping it together.

with a thickness forming at the back of his throat and songbirds beginning to sing to signal a coming sunrise, perhaps in the next hour, eren takes his first step and hushes past his teeth: ] I need to go.

[ and maybe just lay down and think while getting his neck healed. ]

[Eren...The fae took a sharp breath. One loud enough that her ears twitched as it cut through the strange, uneasy silence that had settled between them. Mikasa wading a slow step forward, enough for her shoulders to poke above the water's surface.

Did she comfort? Like he'd said, he wasn't sure where to start. But neither was she. She wasn't sure how to live in a place that didn't have constant fighting. She'd wanted to be a farmer. To live a simple life. And now she had that opportunity, she couldn't settle. Constantly on edge that something would happen. It had always been a distant dream.

A dream was different to reality.

And in their reality that peaceful dream was just that. Wasn't it? Something impossible, something that could only be seen when they closed their eyes.

Her face was pale, more so than usual as she looked at him. With the same sad eyes she'd had when she'd found him in Libero. Mouth closing silently, taking a small step to duck the spines that ran along his body, just in case. Head dipping, hiding her face.

She couldn't stop him from going...She never had been able to.]

Aguril catchall

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