middaeg | (closed) parting is such sweet sorrow they say

[ The second the dragon grabs his arm, Trevor flings it away from him and nearly stumbles backwards as he does so. Thankfully, he catches his balance but the harsh glare he gives the dragon is enough to feel like daggers cutting through scales with the way his eyes flare with that crimson red for a moment. ]

Fuck off! I don't need you babysitting me. I can take care of myself.

[ Swishing his cape around him tightly, he turns and bumps into a table as he goes to leave. Because... fuck this place. ]

[ That glare cuts through him like a knife. Like any other knife, however, he simply shrugs it off. A reaction like that will not deter him -- his will is too strong for that.

Berserker sighs, gives a look to the bartender, and follows after Trevor. It's going to be a long night... ]

You really think that's all my concern is? You think I want to babysit you? I want you to say something to me that isn't a lie or deflecting attention from yourself. [ His eyes narrow. ] I don't expect you to tell me how you feel, but I expect you to have the barest fucking courtesy to not lie to my face, Belmont.

[ And yet...he stops in his pursuit. ]

If you really want me to leave you alone, I'll fucking leave you alone.

[ He's out of the bar and heading down the docks when Berserker speaks and Trevor spins on his foot, finger shoved out at the dragon and emotion heavy on his pale face. ]

I do. D'you know why? Because people fucking leave. All the fucking time. Here. Wallachia. Wherever the fuck you're from. They all just up and leave. If they're not fucking killed first.

[ He stumbles a bit as he speaks but manages to catch his balance and deep beneath the words he... quite loudly for that matter... says to the dragon, there's another cut felt through their bond. Hot with anger but laced so strongly with heartache that it's impossible to miss where this anger comes from. ]

You know yourself, don't you? How many people have left you here? How many bonds did you lose? So why don't we save each other the trouble and leave each other, too?

[ Rubbing his hands together, he throws them up in the air then as if throwing something tangible. ]

Poof! It's gone. Magic! One less person to give a shit about.

[ It's exactly as he thought. His own anger at the situation feels misplaced suddenly. Berserker grows quiet as Trevor yells, letting him get it out for now. He also doesn't approach, instead staying back where he stopped. In contrast to how loud the vampire is, Berserker keeps his voice low. ]

...Two. I've lost two. [ He still carried them close to his heart, one quite literally in the form of Geralt's witcher necklace. ] But do you know what I didn't do? I didn't push away my other bonded -- I relied on them because I needed them. The latest time included you...As much pain as I was in, I needed to be reminded of what makes that pain worth it.

[ God, he doesn't have the excuse of being drunk to be as open as he is right now. At least it's late enough at night that the docks are a ghost town. ]

But...if you want to make the decision to end our bond, I won't keep you. You're free to do as you like.

[ Anger ripples through him enough to overshadow the heartache that shatters his heart and with quick vampire speed, he's right there in front of Berserker then, hands grasping the front of his... whatever he's wearing.... pale fingers twisting in tight to the point where his own strength cracks a finger or two.

The stare he gives the dragon is cold. The coldest he's ever given him, as if the vampire itself is there before Berserker rather than the bumbling Trevor Belmont he's come to grow close to over the past nine months. ]

Sypha's gone. [ As if Berserker knows who that is... maybe?? But it's a little obvious through their Bond. ] She was the first person who saw me as something more than just a fucking washed up Belmont who didn't give a shit about anyone or anything. She was the first friend I'd had in god knows how long and I loved her. I know what loss feels like and I don't want it. Not anymore.

[ Fingers twist tighter and another on cracks as he stares down the dragon with those cold red eyes. But, as hot as the anger is that runs through him, it's the overflow of heartache that softens the edges of such anger and his face falters some as his head then falls against the dragon's shoulder. ]

Why does everyone I care for leave? I don't want to wake up one day and find you're gone, too.

Edited 2020-08-02 03:36 (UTC)

[ Again, Berserker remains calm as a stark contrast. Losing a bond, especially one that was a close as this one seemed to be, was incredibly painful -- of course Trevor is going to lash out like this. He simply lets him yell, accepts the anger burning through their bond, and maintains his calm.

It's only when he feels the break in that anger that he finally does something besides standing there and taking it. Berserker puts his arms around Trevor in a warm embrace. ]

...I understand that feeling. When I lost Flat, I felt like I might have been cursed. I wondered how long it would be until you were gone, too. Everything good in my life leaves, that's just how it is. Remember that I vowed to bear your burdens as my own...Don't try to bear this alone. I won't let you.

[ How vulnerable does he want to make himself? May as well bare it all. ]

You...mean a lot to me, more than I know how to put into words. I don't know what to call what we have, but I cherish it.

[ The way he's gathered up in the dragon's arms- in his Bonded's arms is a warmth that gently touches him throughout. It fills the coldness that lingers within his heart and runs through his veins with the sadness and anger of heartache and lulls him into a safe sort of feeling that touches him deep to his very bones. Fingers still remain cracked, just barely touching at the front of the dragon's clothing and Trevor finds himself feeling that heartache becoming gently replaced with the warmth that is his Bonded and the words he quietly offers him.

It's strange. They've been through so much together. So much that two people should never go through and yet, both of them are still here. From snarling fights to bones bopping over heads to careful washing of hair straight to heads resting against shoulders in a silence that means so much more than any words could offer. They've been through a lot and Trevor is not necessarily terrified of what else they might end up going through, but what it is he stands to lose here with the dragon. With Berserker. With Ciaran.

The anger of red disappears from his eyes and all that is left is the sad gentle blue that shines so bright within the cloak of night around them. If it weren't for the fact that he's supposed to look pale, he might look like a sad sack of shit right now. But the real pain lingers within the center of his heart where only Berserker and Alucard are able to really see it, never mind feel it.

But something stirs within Trevor as he looks to Berserker. Whether it be influenced by those words or the gentle sort of warmth that he can feel pulsing through their Bond - an attempt to try and calm him maybe?? - he can't really pinpoint it and it's not like it really matters. Trevor might be absolute trash when it comes to trying to parse what he feels in these moments but with Sypha having spontaneously left from this place and without even an inkling of a warning for it, he finds himself just going with whatever comes to him and, surprisingly, it's from that very same heart he often thinks doesn't beat or feel anymore. Forehead pressed to Berserker's, he sighs. ]

I love you. Don't go.

[ Ah.

Those three little words and him had an unfortunate history. Medb, the woman basically responsible for his existence, told him she loved him constantly; her words were possessive and he couldn't have cared less for her. He disliked hearing people say they loved him for that reason. Only Diarmuid had spoken them to him in a way he believed and even then, it took months for him to say them. It didn't feel much different now, months spent dancing around the topic of exactly what they meant to each other.

For as little as he used to feel and as relatively little as he feels now, the words still strike him with an intensity. It's not Medb speaking them and Trevor would never say something like that as a means of showing ownership. He's still unsure if he's capable of loving someone else as a normal person would, whatever he feels is close enough...

He thinks so, anyway. Emotions are still a difficult topic for him.

Silence, an eternity of silence, and then a gentle kiss. ]

You're drunk...But I'm not going anywhere.

[ No. That's absolutely NOT a thing that he throws around so easily. Even here, he'd had a difficult time admitting it to Sypha and Alucard. Maybe because he's afraid to admit he actually cares. Maybe because it just brings back memories of having lost those he loved before. Maybe because it just makes him realize that there's actually more to him and that he can be more if he just lets himself be. Whatever the reason(s), the fact that he doesn't get stared at oddly or shoved away is... nice and excuse you, he's just A LITTLE TIPSY, thanks. ]

You broke my fingers.

[ He mutters that after the kiss, holding up his hand to show that, yeah, they sure look broken. Not that they won't heal up in a couple minutes. Thanks, vampire healing factor. ]

In your... stupid shirt.

You broke your own fingers in my shirt.

[ Because no, he's not going to let him get away with that. Berserker takes Trevor's hand in his own and kisses his fingers with surprising tenderness. ]

Is that better? [ Another little kiss. His mood certainly has shifted. ] How about now?

[ He and Berserker are... usually not so gentle or tender with one another?? Well, that's not ENTIRELY true. There are quiet moments of support for one another here and there. But anything like this with gentle and tender touches... not so much?? So, it makes those blue eyes of his blink for a moment and pale skin almost seems a bit flushed on his cheeks but that could just be the alcohol. CLEARLY. ]

That's... not bad.

[ He can slowly feel his fingers beginning to heal within the dragon's touch and hums a bit before he looks down between them. ]

M'sorry... about... in there.

[ Getting upset and all in the bar. ]

(closed) parting is such sweet sorrow they say

swoops back in here with A MOODY BOY

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