The journey to the building that'd serve as their new home was pretty long. The city-wide travel services (Odd steam-powered trams, animal drawn carriages, as well as a wealth of other things) didn't go out this far, so the majority of their journey had been on foot- past where what could feasibly be called city thinned out into mirrorbound housing, and then thinned out all the more into abandoned suburbs, then sparsely developed villages, and on and on into what could only really be called a dirt road- and then ...this.
It suited Cloud fine, the remoteness of their location. Seemed to be exactly what Nier was after too. The house itself- more a cottage than any other kind of dwelling- kind of needed work. A lot of it- which probably tallied with the fact that due to its location- the middle of nowhere, only the wall and the wilde in plain sight, must have meant that it was overcome first when the shades originally attacked.
Precarious, perhaps. Reflected in its price? Yes. Very much so. But he owes Nier no small amount of trust by now. And that was the reason he'd agreed to putting his money alongside Nier's so they could buy it. It'd.... more or less wiped him out financially, sure. But it seemed worth it. Even if the point was to get somewhere bigger for the ...four of them now, how Nier's face had lit up when he'd seen this place originally hadn't escaped him.
So.
As the pair of them step inside (Zack and Aerith could follow later. They probably needed time together- and packing up Aerith's... not unsubstantial amount of stuff seemed the perfect excuse) Cloud's boots sound loud against the stone floor. The walls, likewise- are stone. Piled upward indescriminately to low ceilings, accented by no small number of dusty, wooden support beams skewering the ceiling.
Old? Yes. Dusty? Absolutely. But the cottage is enormous. There's a large entrance hall, leading, in traditional style, to a kitchen with an old stove. A large, wooden staircase, and... a lot of rooms upstairs. Cellarage, basement, and...]
Hey. Uh-
[It's a small statement. quiet, but it comes with a bump of his shoulder against Nier's as they walk through the building.]
[ perhaps it's the darkness, or the scent of a place he'd once known as home, but the forest calls for him — in its isolation and greenery, there is a peace the city does not offer.
for cloud, this may have been a far detour from the life he'd grown used to. for nier, this was the closest he would get to reliving the past — the cobblestone reminds him of his mother, and the way she would stretch out fabric between the pads of her fingers, humming all the while. yonah wasn't born yet, so he would run out through the front door, running over the hills, arms stretched far and wide as he soaked in the sunlight.
that twinge of warmth, of longing, is enough for him to forfeit his savings. it's what's brought them here — they enter the cottage, the heels of his boots drumming against the wood, and nier seats a box down with a thud that echoes loudly enough to make the stairway tremble.
with a breath, and a ghost of a smile— ]
Yeah. Welcome home, Cloud.
[ and a bit boyishly does he sidle up behind him, arms wrapping around his waist in a slack grip. his chin nestles into the crook of cloud's neck, taking in the scent of his skin. ]
[Maybe it's that. Or maybe it's more similar to Nier's situation than he thinks. Truthfully, this place reminds Cloud of his own mother's place. Even if it's far bigger than the building in which she lived, certain things call it to mind. The stonework? Yeah. The beams? ...Yeah. The floor? Definitely. Only whereas the recollection of home's a good one for Nier, for him.... that's not exactly the case.
Still. It's not exactly anything he's gone into with him. Nier wouldn't know. The same way he wants to ask why Nier himself was drawn to a place like this- but that's something for later.
...Nier likes it. That'd been enough to make him agree to go for this place, and it's enough for now.
As he moves closer, when he feels his arms loop around him, he raises his head to view him properly- bringing his hand to Nier's own at where they rest at his stomach. ...Not to push them away. Instead, he squeezes them, just faintly, feeling his tail kick up from a gentle sway to a rapid, continual strike between each of his legs- a thoughtless, joyful, unrestrained wag, at the sudden contact.
...Damn thing.
And.]
Yeah, for sure.
[Wag. Wag. Wag. Fuck. The more he wills his tail to just stop, the more it seems to do it. ...Reluctantly, he steps out of his hold. And finally, it slows down.]
We should probably check around. Might have animals or other stuff using it as shelter.
[ the squeeze of cloud's hand is warm. it slices through the clinical coldness of nier's own skin, and he's eager to reciprocate, his grip tightening for a fraction of a moment. however at the wag of cloud's tail, nier stifles a laugh; it breaks out along his lips, in the form of a smile, and he lets cloud break from his grasp.
he doesn't let him go just yet. meaningfully, he catches cloud's hand in his own before trying to guide him towards the backyard — it was visible through the windows, an expanse of greenery bathed in the sunlight. nier has to be careful, of course. ]
There's enough room for us to hunt... [ he remarks, now distracted. ]
[He'll never not laugh, huh. Even though Nier doesn't- he senses it- in the way his eyes light up and the way his mouth twists faintly into a smile. Half of him wants to close the space between them and silence said laugh with a press of his own lips- but instead his eyes move away. ...Bashfully. And perhaps telling of his own (good) mood, too.
When his hand's grabbed, he allows himself to be pliable, stepping back into his grasp and allowing himself to be guided. ....He lingers, though. Just in the shadows, just at the threshold of where Nier would be comfortable, and ....not comfortable. And he looks out of the window.]
Yeah, you're right. It's not far from the woods, either. [A thoughtful tone lingers at the edge of his voice.] ...All of this, up until the woods, is ours, right? Could probably grow all kinds of things.
[A glance to him.]
You and Aerith can probably work on it together. Wish you could've seen her mom's place in the slums.
[The outside has a special meaning to him, changes, and all. Before coming here, it... didn't mean all that much. But the animal in him favours it- for the feel of the grass underneath his feet, hundreds of thousands of differing scents in the air, each promising different feelings, different experiences, boundless promise which is always hard to turn away from, and always, always, feels a world away from being cooped up indoors.
...That, as well as privacy. Their last living arrangement wasn't terrible. But privacy was kind of in short supply which... is pretty obvious, given that they were now at four in two rooms- something which now, isn't the case. There's easily two rooms an occupant here. Possibly even more. A huge family must have lived here. Possibly even worked the land for what they needed, kept animals...
But regardless, whatever any past inhabitant had done with the place, for them, they'd probably have to really try to be on top of each other. But...]
Flowers, huh? ...You won't need reminders. Because we're always going to be around each other. Right?
[....Well. Other than when they're working. He spies the colour in the other's face, and... a part of him warms up, just a touch, at the sight of it. His gaze, accordingly, moves away. But his tail, again, roils.
He's pleased, apparently. But.]
...I, uh...
[It lowers. He almost looks pensive. And his hand moves to Nier's own as it lingers on his shoulder, squeezing. A deep breath, and...]
You can say no, if you want. ...It's your call. But I don't want my own room this time.
[He raises his eyes to him.]
Probably cut out a lot of bullshit. You know, with... you finding me when you- you know- Look... I don't know what we are. And it doesn't need to have a name. But I like you. A lot. And I don't care if the others know about it.
[Pause.]
But if you... don't want to be so obvious, then I get it. I can choose somewhere else. Like I said, it's your decision.
[ "if you want me around, i'll be there—" is what he almost says. it's a half truth, the part of him that's eager to place some kind of distance between the idea of "self" and the world having thrown him askew. to want is a strange feeling; to want something that wasn't blood or vengance, something that wasn't the end.
with an existence like his, he wonders how viable it truly is.
his gaze lifts at what cloud says next, lips parting momentarily. ]
I like you, too. [ nier says, the smile on his lips furling like a flower in bloom. he doesn't remember when it got there, but his eyes are gleaming in the light. ]
We'll get a bed big enough for the both of us. And every time I wake up, I'll be able to see your face. I like the thought of that.
[Might be a pretty ugly sight, waking up to him every morning. Might be through two black eyes too- given that the both of them... aren't exactly the best sleepers. It's... subconscious. Nier's sleep is always fitful. He tosses, turns, thrashes and yells words in some language Cloud's never even heard of, and most nights, Cloud tends to wake up with a series of bruises to show for it- as well as deep nailmarks in his arms from whichever point Nier ceases his struggle, and just clings to him for a few scant hours of only partially disturbed rest.
...But it's not just him. Cloud's not the best sleeper either- he's got his own nightmares- and Nier some nights... probably looks the worse of the both of them. All subconscious. Of course, subconscious. Therefore, no grudge is held. At least on his end. And now, Nier's agreement would possibly signal the same.
...They're both as screwed up as the other. That, as well as the fact they both can't regulate their body temperatures, as well as... well, mutual... feelings make it a good call. It's logical.
...But the feelings are a bit of a weird one. They make him lower his eyes, make the corner of his mouth quirk into an uncharacteristic smile. Even makes his hand tighten, just slightly, on the other's.]
...Thanks. For saying yes.
[If he hadn't said yes, had Cloud already planned something to say to brush it off and act like refusal wasn't crushing? Maybe. But that's not needed. He raises his eyes, his expression neutral again. And he pulls him, just lightly, a little more away from the light and further into the shadows of the room.]
I guess we should get started. ...But we can always pick a room before the others arrive.
[ it’s anxiety inducing in its own right; he hadn’t been accustomed to this kind of normalcy, nightmares intact and all. but he had grown to like it, in all of its foreignness, like a place far, far away from what he had known his entire life.
he gives cloud’s hand a light squeeze. leans forward, eyes still smiling, warm like a candle that hasn’t quite flickered out yet. and wouldn’t for a long, long while. ]
You don’t have to thank me. It’s for me, too.
[ i’m being selfish, he seems to say. ]
Let’s go. [ and they do, even as the stairwell threatens to creak beneath their weight. there are two bedrooms, one positioned closer to the oak tree towering over the roof like overgrown mold. it draws him immediately, probably due to the shade. ]
[It isn't something he'd pick, to be fair. But honestly, nor's any of this. His wolf side, unfortunately, wants to move off into the wilds. To stay there and to...
No.
He leans against Nier, just slightly, as they stand there, bringing his eyes to his face. This... It's kind of nice, even if he wouldn't personally choose it. It's shaded, thanks to that oak. There's shutters, too... the type which are bolted to the outside of the house. Thick wood, where no light at all could get in.
[ he gives him a cordial, easy nod — nier was far from picky. if there was shade and space for them both, he was inclined towards a simple "yes" and not much more.
the privacy, though. it makes him remember that there's another line of conversation he wants to open up. something delicate and deeply personal, perhaps a matter he hadn't had any right to; but he also guesses that when you...feel this way towards someone, it's natural to want to know more about them. to pry them open and see the grotesquerie for what it is. ]
Yeah. It's perfect.
[ and then briskly, the back of his hand sweeps against cloud's as if to get his attention. ]
There's something I wanted to talk about, if that's alright...
[ he remembers the conversation well enough — the intimate details that had sent him spiraling into his own deeply embroiled history. one that spanned 1000 years back. his eyes widen and glisten with concern, jawline tensing. ]
Your conversation with Zack. I...heard a lot of it. And about what you went through together. So long as you're here, I'll protect the both of you. You know that, right?
[It's a good thing that both of their 'gifts' mean they can see in the dark. For Cloud, it's comfortable- the wolf part of him can make things out easily in this complete absence of light- so the shutters remain closed. He cranes his head back when Nier's hand brushes against his wrist, leaning against his chest again, and looking up- backwards- at his face as he speaks - unnaturally blue eyes glowing faintly in the gloom.]
...Oh. You... did, huh.
[They've argued too much about things like this to repeat the affair. About Nier's kind of 'protection', what it entails, and as for the fact that it is indeed non-negotiable. They're facts. Nier won that argument, and... re-entering it is just as productive as slamming his head against a wall.
But something overshadows even that, and he pulls away from him, just enough to turn around.]
The people that were responsible aren't here. If they ever turn up... They're dead in about three different ways before me and Zack even get a turn.
[A faint pause.]
...So don't worry. I get it, you're gonna do what you do. But... I don't want you worrying about it. Unless... [Another.] Unless it makes you see me differently. What happened.
[The Thing That Will Forever Be Known As 'What Happened' Because He Wants No Part In Talking About It, Ever.]
[ it doesn't get past him — how personal it all is, he means. it's an entanglement alltogether, like a festering wound that isn't his to pick or prod at. he lets cloud put distance between them, but nier still turns to face his back, making his presence known. ]
It doesn't. Nothing would. [ especially not his suffering. ] You know about who...what I am. I'm not going to turn you away.
[ he takes a step closer. it doesn't do much to breach the divide, and he doesn't mean for it to. it's more of a means of communicating. of saying that he's here, tangible and for him exclusively. ]
...I'm not worried. But I can tell — that he's important to you. And so long as he's important to you, I want to make sure that neither of you get hurt.
[It's a simple statement, something that almost cuts Nier off from the end of his original sentence. But it's something meant. Even if there was some other Nier somewhere, even if this man was, appearance wise, created as a doppelganger, or as the red-haired girls so long ago in his memories had said, a replicant for that man, they weren't anything alike.
Nier's experiences weren't made any less. His hardships no less pertinent, decisions no less consequential. And if those things didn't make a person a person...
Hell if he knew what made one at all. Nier was a who, not a what. And like anyone else, his actions made that difference.]
Who you are.
[A small clarification, uttered lowly. But:]
I'll tell him. Gotta admit, he's probably gonna be surprised.
[Pause.]
Probably gonna have to explain a lot to him too. What we mean to each other, for instance. That okay with you? [Pause.] I- uh- get it, if you don't want me saying anything.
[ who, he says. who. somehow, it had been easier to be a thing — to resign to being a monster than acknowledge his own humanity. who was he? he was nier. one of many. was nier a person or an entity, manufactured for the sake of the earth?
he wonders. he had not been a person, let alone a thing for some time. it doesn’t settle like it should; instead it clings to the pit of his stomach uncomfortably, forever in limbo.
...and yet there’s a shine in his eyes when he looks towards cloud, vulnerable and boy-like. ]
Who. [ he repeats softly. ] ...Right.
[ thoughtlessly, as though he were drifting aimlessly in a sea of oblivion again, he draws closer to cloud. he stops at the heels of his feet and gingerly tugs at his sleeve. ]
Yeah.
[ and then there is a moment where everything is still and nothing happens. ]
[Maybe he was a thing that became a person. Or maybe, the Gestalt project made people outright- removed from their purpose simply by the fact that they had just as much right to live as any of the people they were supposed to be vessels for. They had their own existences. Their own lives. Their own thoughts, their own feelings. Even if humanity hadn't already fallen, it wouldn't make it any less of a fact that humanity had inadvertently created humanity even if they intended to create something to be used.
But. When Cloud's looked at- like that- he can't help but move closer too. It's dark, sure. But he can make out every feature on his face- the way his lips twist downward, the way he seems... fragile, just for a moment, it makes something twist in his chest. of course he moves closer.
It's instinctive to.
He stops shy of touching him, though. What they discussed previously is still on his mind, and.. honestly... it makes him withdraw. He keeps his eyes on him though- for once, not looking away.
and then he says that.
He had a suspicion. Of course he did- if anything, because he... discovered that a little while back. But he'd stayed quiet about it. Because he took things too far, didn't he? Always had, always would. It's something that's wrong with him, always been wrong with him.
If he hadn't-
Finally, he looks away.]
...Okay.
[He needs to... He... Why can't he...?]
I'll, uh, tell him.
[Come on.]
Nier, about-
[What the hell's wrong with him.]
That. And-
[His arms have found their way to his torso. Every muscle's clenched. And they grip each other.]
[ the idea or prospect of reciprocation had been an afterthought to him. he’d known already, in his own way, of course; whatever they had, it was mutual, like two animals carving a space out in each other for themselves. it hits him hard — for a moment, the gravity of what he’s confessed to...or rather, what he’s condemned someone else to kicks in.
but in his attempt to set it aside, just for a second, to not run away this time...nier lets his hands rove up and feel for cloud’s face. they rest at his cheekbones, a thumb dusting against his skin. there’s a meaningful pause as he loses himself in the electric blues of his eyes. ]
It makes me happy that you do.
[ it’s deep, barely shaking with emotion, maybe some kind of vulnerability he hasn’t quite shown until now. a perfectly human fear — to be known and to want. but it’s an honest admission. he’s content with this: the feeling of cloud’s skin underneath his own, and the knowledge that this is something they share, somehow. ]
[He needs to work more, he said. Moving into a gigantic house would be fine if he just did more jobs, he said.
....Jobs wasn't the issue. Not really. Cloud tended to go for the more dangerous ones. The complicated ones. The ones that took time, that spanned over days and days, in areas which sure as hell weren't anything close to the main city. The ones which most people didn't want to do for a multitude of different reasons were generally the ones that netted the most pay.
...But new living arrangements meant that picking and choosing jobs, getting 1-2 paydays a month wasn't going to cut it. Not anymore. He had to weave in smaller, lighter, sillier, less important ones in as well. Mainly because they cleared easily, quickly. Lots of small rewards, over the course of a month could add up.
....Right?
But this sucks. Cloud's... about an hour into what seemed just a (shitty) job. Clearing some field of some form of plant which made some form of material, for .... some form of farmer. Easy, right? Mindless, probably backbreaking. Decidedly nonviolent. Quick. Easy. Just. A job. Except, ... well, is it him, or is someone talking?
He can barely make it out, but it's as if whispering's happening right beneath his feet. But it's only really when someone else arrives that it's no longer a whisper.
The damn plants are actually yelling.]
Hey you! Little guy!! You know blondie here only does his hair like that because it sticks up in all directions anyway, and the spiked thing is the only thing he can do to it that doesn't look totally stupid?
[Sora takes on a healthy amount of extra jobs for himself. But it's not really because he needs to make the money but because he likes to keep busy and sitting still for too long is really bad on his energy levels. So instead of doing something stupid at home, he does stupid things in the Wilde! Like fighting cwyld creatures and clearing out people's basements of rodents. It's not the most glamourous thing but someone's gotta do it.
Today is another one of those tedious 'someone's gotta do it' days where he's signed up to clear out a farmer's field as well. he brings his ultima weapon keyblade with him just in case since the Wilde has been a little... well, wild, lately. And the rural areas could always be attacked first. But as he walks up to the field it seems pretty free of any trouble?]
Huh-?
[He thinks too soon because suddenly he hears some sort of tiny sounding voice thanks to his adept rabbit ears. And then he spots Cloud too!]
Somehow, the plant he kicked is still talking. And it's only when he's actually leant down, pulled off the (fluffy) tuft that it stops. He lifts his gaze from his basket, and glances to Sora.]
Wait-! Don't come any closer!
[Dramatic? Possibly. But perhaps Sora would see why the second one of the planets brushes up against him...]
[Luckily Sora does manage to stop when Cloud shouts at him to not come any closer and he even throws his hands up in the air in front of him like he's been caught. Even if there's nothing to be caught about.]
What's wrong-
[He's quickly interrupted by a plant that brushes up against Sora's leg who suddenly screeches at him!]
"Did you know that some people have way too many bonds around here? I hear things that some rabbits tend to get carried away with them. Huh?! Is it, true!??"
[Oh, buddy. You didn't want to do that. Cloud.. unfortunately, is reduced to simply giving Sora a Look as he steps forward, unsure as to whether or not saying something himself will make the plants... be aware of him again.
That's a hell of a secret of Sora's though, and if anything, looking at the guy makes him wonder if, well, that might be the reason he's looking even more rabbit-like than last time.
Maybe.
That look of reproach is mixed with one of concern almost immediately, and, even if it's a risk, the obvious really needed to be stated.]
These things can talk, I guess. [Even without a mouth.] And... read minds? [Even without a brain??]
Aw, that's so cute!! So THAT guy wants to bond with everyone, and THIS guy doesn't want to bond with anyone, because he's afraid of letting them into his head! They're real opposites, huh?
What- Wha! Geeze! What are these things, monster mushrooms all connected to each other or something?
[ Surprisingly a good guess coming from Sora. It's like the plants are all connected to each other and are cooing out all this gossip and if it's true or not is hard to tell. And how they know is even harder to tell.
Sora's long rabbit ears practically droop. He indeed looks much more rabbit-like these days. He's complete with yellow eyes and a tail too. But that comes with some rabbit claws too so Sora is quickly ducking down and ripping a plant or two out of the ground with them. ]
Come on!
[ And seemingly... the plucking makes the plant return to exactly what it is. Just a plant. A quite and untalking plant. ]
I'm not about to eat any of these things. Cloud, what are you doing with this stuff? Collecting it?
Not mushrooms. More like... [He's got no idea. He's not exactly a farm boy.] ...Some kind of plant. The old guy inside that building was hiring people to pick 'em all. Thought it was something he could have done himself.
[Except.}
Guess now we know why he wanted other people to do it.
[And one brush later...]
What he's NOT saying is he doesn't want to take jobs far away anymore! He's scared something's going to happen to NEW people he cares about that came in if he does!!
[Okay, that's it. This particular patch of grass? That's getting sliced. There's a chorus of tiny little plant screams and...]
[Sora blinks quickly and he's a little unsure what to make of that plant's shouted gossip. There is something a little telling about what these things are spouting and now Sora can't help casting a curious glance at Cloud himself. A while back Cloud had checked on him to make sure he was okay and he had appreciated it. But was anyone checking in on Cloud?
His ears perk upwards again as he fiddles with the plucked plants in his hands.]
Cloud, are you really worried about the people you've met in this world? Is that true?
[Cloud always was a worry wart...]
I can help you with the rest of this task if you want.
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☆ closed | nier
The journey to the building that'd serve as their new home was pretty long. The city-wide travel services (Odd steam-powered trams, animal drawn carriages, as well as a wealth of other things) didn't go out this far, so the majority of their journey had been on foot- past where what could feasibly be called city thinned out into mirrorbound housing, and then thinned out all the more into abandoned suburbs, then sparsely developed villages, and on and on into what could only really be called a dirt road- and then ...this.
It suited Cloud fine, the remoteness of their location. Seemed to be exactly what Nier was after too. The house itself- more a cottage than any other kind of dwelling- kind of needed work. A lot of it- which probably tallied with the fact that due to its location- the middle of nowhere, only the wall and the wilde in plain sight, must have meant that it was overcome first when the shades originally attacked.
Precarious, perhaps. Reflected in its price? Yes. Very much so. But he owes Nier no small amount of trust by now. And that was the reason he'd agreed to putting his money alongside Nier's so they could buy it. It'd.... more or less wiped him out financially, sure. But it seemed worth it. Even if the point was to get somewhere bigger for the ...four of them now, how Nier's face had lit up when he'd seen this place originally hadn't escaped him.
So.
As the pair of them step inside (Zack and Aerith could follow later. They probably needed time together- and packing up Aerith's... not unsubstantial amount of stuff seemed the perfect excuse) Cloud's boots sound loud against the stone floor. The walls, likewise- are stone. Piled upward indescriminately to low ceilings, accented by no small number of dusty, wooden support beams skewering the ceiling.
Old? Yes. Dusty? Absolutely. But the cottage is enormous. There's a large entrance hall, leading, in traditional style, to a kitchen with an old stove. A large, wooden staircase, and... a lot of rooms upstairs. Cellarage, basement, and...]
Hey. Uh-
[It's a small statement. quiet, but it comes with a bump of his shoulder against Nier's as they walk through the building.]
...Welcome home.
no subject
for cloud, this may have been a far detour from the life he'd grown used to. for nier, this was the closest he would get to reliving the past — the cobblestone reminds him of his mother, and the way she would stretch out fabric between the pads of her fingers, humming all the while. yonah wasn't born yet, so he would run out through the front door, running over the hills, arms stretched far and wide as he soaked in the sunlight.
that twinge of warmth, of longing, is enough for him to forfeit his savings. it's what's brought them here — they enter the cottage, the heels of his boots drumming against the wood, and nier seats a box down with a thud that echoes loudly enough to make the stairway tremble.
with a breath, and a ghost of a smile— ]
Yeah. Welcome home, Cloud.
[ and a bit boyishly does he sidle up behind him, arms wrapping around his waist in a slack grip. his chin nestles into the crook of cloud's neck, taking in the scent of his skin. ]
We made the right choice.
no subject
Still. It's not exactly anything he's gone into with him. Nier wouldn't know. The same way he wants to ask why Nier himself was drawn to a place like this- but that's something for later.
...Nier likes it. That'd been enough to make him agree to go for this place, and it's enough for now.
As he moves closer, when he feels his arms loop around him, he raises his head to view him properly- bringing his hand to Nier's own at where they rest at his stomach. ...Not to push them away. Instead, he squeezes them, just faintly, feeling his tail kick up from a gentle sway to a rapid, continual strike between each of his legs- a thoughtless, joyful, unrestrained wag, at the sudden contact.
...Damn thing.
And.]
Yeah, for sure.
[Wag. Wag. Wag. Fuck. The more he wills his tail to just stop, the more it seems to do it. ...Reluctantly, he steps out of his hold. And finally, it slows down.]
We should probably check around. Might have animals or other stuff using it as shelter.
no subject
he doesn't let him go just yet. meaningfully, he catches cloud's hand in his own before trying to guide him towards the backyard — it was visible through the windows, an expanse of greenery bathed in the sunlight. nier has to be careful, of course. ]
There's enough room for us to hunt... [ he remarks, now distracted. ]
Go look. We have to see if it's good for you.
no subject
When his hand's grabbed, he allows himself to be pliable, stepping back into his grasp and allowing himself to be guided. ....He lingers, though. Just in the shadows, just at the threshold of where Nier would be comfortable, and ....not comfortable. And he looks out of the window.]
Yeah, you're right. It's not far from the woods, either. [A thoughtful tone lingers at the edge of his voice.] ...All of this, up until the woods, is ours, right? Could probably grow all kinds of things.
[A glance to him.]
You and Aerith can probably work on it together. Wish you could've seen her mom's place in the slums.
no subject
[ the sunlight reflects against his eyes, thawing the ice blue; he turns to cloud, an equally sunny smiling beginning to play along his lips. ]
I could grow you flowers. Ones that remind me of you...
[ and then a step back, lax and slow, before the palm of his hand smooths down cloud's shoulder. ]
And we can spend as much time as we want to, out there. [ a light shade of pink colors his cheeks. it's innocuous, really, but— ]
Just you and me.
[ still embarassing, for some reason unknown to him. ]
no subject
...That, as well as privacy. Their last living arrangement wasn't terrible. But privacy was kind of in short supply which... is pretty obvious, given that they were now at four in two rooms- something which now, isn't the case. There's easily two rooms an occupant here. Possibly even more. A huge family must have lived here. Possibly even worked the land for what they needed, kept animals...
But regardless, whatever any past inhabitant had done with the place, for them, they'd probably have to really try to be on top of each other. But...]
Flowers, huh? ...You won't need reminders. Because we're always going to be around each other. Right?
[....Well. Other than when they're working. He spies the colour in the other's face, and... a part of him warms up, just a touch, at the sight of it. His gaze, accordingly, moves away. But his tail, again, roils.
He's pleased, apparently. But.]
...I, uh...
[It lowers. He almost looks pensive. And his hand moves to Nier's own as it lingers on his shoulder, squeezing. A deep breath, and...]
You can say no, if you want. ...It's your call. But I don't want my own room this time.
[He raises his eyes to him.]
Probably cut out a lot of bullshit. You know, with... you finding me when you- you know-
Look... I don't know what we are. And it doesn't need to have a name.
But I like you. A lot. And I don't care if the others know about it.
[Pause.]
But if you... don't want to be so obvious, then I get it. I can choose somewhere else. Like I said, it's your decision.
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with an existence like his, he wonders how viable it truly is.
his gaze lifts at what cloud says next, lips parting momentarily. ]
I like you, too. [ nier says, the smile on his lips furling like a flower in bloom. he doesn't remember when it got there, but his eyes are gleaming in the light. ]
We'll get a bed big enough for the both of us. And every time I wake up, I'll be able to see your face. I like the thought of that.
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...But it's not just him. Cloud's not the best sleeper either- he's got his own nightmares- and Nier some nights... probably looks the worse of the both of them. All subconscious. Of course, subconscious. Therefore, no grudge is held. At least on his end. And now, Nier's agreement would possibly signal the same.
...They're both as screwed up as the other. That, as well as the fact they both can't regulate their body temperatures, as well as... well, mutual... feelings make it a good call. It's logical.
...But the feelings are a bit of a weird one. They make him lower his eyes, make the corner of his mouth quirk into an uncharacteristic smile. Even makes his hand tighten, just slightly, on the other's.]
...Thanks. For saying yes.
[If he hadn't said yes, had Cloud already planned something to say to brush it off and act like refusal wasn't crushing? Maybe. But that's not needed. He raises his eyes, his expression neutral again. And he pulls him, just lightly, a little more away from the light and further into the shadows of the room.]
I guess we should get started.
...But we can always pick a room before the others arrive.
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he gives cloud’s hand a light squeeze. leans forward, eyes still smiling, warm like a candle that hasn’t quite flickered out yet. and wouldn’t for a long, long while. ]
You don’t have to thank me. It’s for me, too.
[ i’m being selfish, he seems to say. ]
Let’s go. [ and they do, even as the stairwell threatens to creak beneath their weight. there are two bedrooms, one positioned closer to the oak tree towering over the roof like overgrown mold. it draws him immediately, probably due to the shade. ]
Over here?
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[It isn't something he'd pick, to be fair. But honestly, nor's any of this. His wolf side, unfortunately, wants to move off into the wilds. To stay there and to...
No.
He leans against Nier, just slightly, as they stand there, bringing his eyes to his face. This... It's kind of nice, even if he wouldn't personally choose it. It's shaded, thanks to that oak. There's shutters, too... the type which are bolted to the outside of the house. Thick wood, where no light at all could get in.
He moves himself, to check.
Sure enough, the room's pitch-black.]
Shouldn't be bothered in here.
[The walls seem thick, too...]
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the privacy, though. it makes him remember that there's another line of conversation he wants to open up. something delicate and deeply personal, perhaps a matter he hadn't had any right to; but he also guesses that when you...feel this way towards someone, it's natural to want to know more about them. to pry them open and see the grotesquerie for what it is. ]
Yeah. It's perfect.
[ and then briskly, the back of his hand sweeps against cloud's as if to get his attention. ]
There's something I wanted to talk about, if that's alright...
[ he remembers the conversation well enough — the intimate details that had sent him spiraling into his own deeply embroiled history. one that spanned 1000 years back. his eyes widen and glisten with concern, jawline tensing. ]
Your conversation with Zack. I...heard a lot of it. And about what you went through together. So long as you're here, I'll protect the both of you. You know that, right?
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...Oh.
You... did, huh.
[They've argued too much about things like this to repeat the affair. About Nier's kind of 'protection', what it entails, and as for the fact that it is indeed non-negotiable. They're facts. Nier won that argument, and... re-entering it is just as productive as slamming his head against a wall.
But something overshadows even that, and he pulls away from him, just enough to turn around.]
The people that were responsible aren't here. If they ever turn up... They're dead in about three different ways before me and Zack even get a turn.
[A faint pause.]
...So don't worry. I get it, you're gonna do what you do. But... I don't want you worrying about it. Unless... [Another.] Unless it makes you see me differently. What happened.
[The Thing That Will Forever Be Known As 'What Happened' Because He Wants No Part In Talking About It, Ever.]
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It doesn't. Nothing would. [ especially not his suffering. ] You know about who...what I am. I'm not going to turn you away.
[ he takes a step closer. it doesn't do much to breach the divide, and he doesn't mean for it to. it's more of a means of communicating. of saying that he's here, tangible and for him exclusively. ]
...I'm not worried. But I can tell — that he's important to you. And so long as he's important to you, I want to make sure that neither of you get hurt.
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[It's a simple statement, something that almost cuts Nier off from the end of his original sentence. But it's something meant. Even if there was some other Nier somewhere, even if this man was, appearance wise, created as a doppelganger, or as the red-haired girls so long ago in his memories had said, a replicant for that man, they weren't anything alike.
Nier's experiences weren't made any less. His hardships no less pertinent, decisions no less consequential. And if those things didn't make a person a person...
Hell if he knew what made one at all.
Nier was a who, not a what. And like anyone else, his actions made that difference.]
Who you are.
[A small clarification, uttered lowly.
But:]
I'll tell him. Gotta admit, he's probably gonna be surprised.
[Pause.]
Probably gonna have to explain a lot to him too. What we mean to each other, for instance. That okay with you? [Pause.] I- uh- get it, if you don't want me saying anything.
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he wonders. he had not been a person, let alone a thing for some time. it doesn’t settle like it should; instead it clings to the pit of his stomach uncomfortably, forever in limbo.
...and yet there’s a shine in his eyes when he looks towards cloud, vulnerable and boy-like. ]
Who. [ he repeats softly. ] ...Right.
[ thoughtlessly, as though he were drifting aimlessly in a sea of oblivion again, he draws closer to cloud. he stops at the heels of his feet and gingerly tugs at his sleeve. ]
Yeah.
[ and then there is a moment where everything is still and nothing happens. ]
You can tell him I love you.
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But. When Cloud's looked at- like that- he can't help but move closer too. It's dark, sure. But he can make out every feature on his face- the way his lips twist downward, the way he seems... fragile, just for a moment, it makes something twist in his chest. of course he moves closer.
It's instinctive to.
He stops shy of touching him, though. What they discussed previously is still on his mind, and.. honestly... it makes him withdraw. He keeps his eyes on him though- for once, not looking away.
and then he says that.
He had a suspicion. Of course he did- if anything, because he... discovered that a little while back. But he'd stayed quiet about it. Because he took things too far, didn't he? Always had, always would. It's something that's wrong with him, always been wrong with him.
If he hadn't-
Finally, he looks away.]
...Okay.
[He needs to...
He...
Why can't he...?]
I'll, uh, tell him.
[Come on.]
Nier, about-
[What the hell's wrong with him.]
That. And-
[His arms have found their way to his torso. Every muscle's clenched. And they grip each other.]
...Look, I-
[He can't look at him.]
...I think I feel the same way. About you.
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but in his attempt to set it aside, just for a second, to not run away this time...nier lets his hands rove up and feel for cloud’s face. they rest at his cheekbones, a thumb dusting against his skin. there’s a meaningful pause as he loses himself in the electric blues of his eyes. ]
It makes me happy that you do.
[ it’s deep, barely shaking with emotion, maybe some kind of vulnerability he hasn’t quite shown until now. a perfectly human fear — to be known and to want. but it’s an honest admission. he’s content with this: the feeling of cloud’s skin underneath his own, and the knowledge that this is something they share, somehow. ]
☆ closed | sora
Moving into a gigantic house would be fine if he just did more jobs, he said.
....Jobs wasn't the issue. Not really. Cloud tended to go for the more dangerous ones. The complicated ones. The ones that took time, that spanned over days and days, in areas which sure as hell weren't anything close to the main city. The ones which most people didn't want to do for a multitude of different reasons were generally the ones that netted the most pay.
...But new living arrangements meant that picking and choosing jobs, getting 1-2 paydays a month wasn't going to cut it. Not anymore. He had to weave in smaller, lighter, sillier, less important ones in as well. Mainly because they cleared easily, quickly. Lots of small rewards, over the course of a month could add up.
....Right?
But this sucks.
Cloud's... about an hour into what seemed just a (shitty) job. Clearing some field of some form of plant which made some form of material, for .... some form of farmer. Easy, right? Mindless, probably backbreaking. Decidedly nonviolent. Quick. Easy. Just. A job. Except, ... well, is it him, or is someone talking?
He can barely make it out, but it's as if whispering's happening right beneath his feet. But it's only really when someone else arrives that it's no longer a whisper.
The damn plants are actually yelling.]
Hey you! Little guy!! You know blondie here only does his hair like that because it sticks up in all directions anyway, and the spiked thing is the only thing he can do to it that doesn't look totally stupid?
....What the...
A kick to the plant.]
Hey!
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Today is another one of those tedious 'someone's gotta do it' days where he's signed up to clear out a farmer's field as well. he brings his ultima weapon keyblade with him just in case since the Wilde has been a little... well, wild, lately. And the rural areas could always be attacked first. But as he walks up to the field it seems pretty free of any trouble?]
Huh-?
[He thinks too soon because suddenly he hears some sort of tiny sounding voice thanks to his adept rabbit ears. And then he spots Cloud too!]
Cloud! Hey, Cloud! What's going on?
[Seriously- What the heck is going on?]
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Somehow, the plant he kicked is still talking. And it's only when he's actually leant down, pulled off the (fluffy) tuft that it stops. He lifts his gaze from his basket, and glances to Sora.]
Wait-! Don't come any closer!
[Dramatic? Possibly. But perhaps Sora would see why the second one of the planets brushes up against him...]
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[Luckily Sora does manage to stop when Cloud shouts at him to not come any closer and he even throws his hands up in the air in front of him like he's been caught. Even if there's nothing to be caught about.]
What's wrong-
[He's quickly interrupted by a plant that brushes up against Sora's leg who suddenly screeches at him!]
"Did you know that some people have way too many bonds around here? I hear things that some rabbits tend to get carried away with them. Huh?! Is it, true!??"
[Sora quickly gapes.]
Wait a minute, what?!
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That's a hell of a secret of Sora's though, and if anything, looking at the guy makes him wonder if, well, that might be the reason he's looking even more rabbit-like than last time.
Maybe.
That look of reproach is mixed with one of concern almost immediately, and, even if it's a risk, the obvious really needed to be stated.]
These things can talk, I guess. [Even without a mouth.] And... read minds? [Even without a brain??]
Aw, that's so cute!! So THAT guy wants to bond with everyone, and THIS guy doesn't want to bond with anyone, because he's afraid of letting them into his head! They're real opposites, huh?
[Fuck.]
Try ripping their heads off. Might shut 'em up.
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[ Surprisingly a good guess coming from Sora. It's like the plants are all connected to each other and are cooing out all this gossip and if it's true or not is hard to tell. And how they know is even harder to tell.
Sora's long rabbit ears practically droop. He indeed looks much more rabbit-like these days. He's complete with yellow eyes and a tail too. But that comes with some rabbit claws too so Sora is quickly ducking down and ripping a plant or two out of the ground with them. ]
Come on!
[ And seemingly... the plucking makes the plant return to exactly what it is. Just a plant. A quite and untalking plant. ]
I'm not about to eat any of these things. Cloud, what are you doing with this stuff? Collecting it?
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[Except.}
Guess now we know why he wanted other people to do it.
[And one brush later...]
What he's NOT saying is he doesn't want to take jobs far away anymore! He's scared something's going to happen to NEW people he cares about that came in if he does!!
[Okay, that's it. This particular patch of grass? That's getting sliced. There's a chorus of tiny little plant screams and...]
Huh. That's way more efficient.
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[Sora blinks quickly and he's a little unsure what to make of that plant's shouted gossip. There is something a little telling about what these things are spouting and now Sora can't help casting a curious glance at Cloud himself. A while back Cloud had checked on him to make sure he was okay and he had appreciated it. But was anyone checking in on Cloud?
His ears perk upwards again as he fiddles with the plucked plants in his hands.]
Cloud, are you really worried about the people you've met in this world? Is that true?
[Cloud always was a worry wart...]
I can help you with the rest of this task if you want.