Event Log: June, What Lies Beneath

[faileas]

Event Log: June, What Lies Beneath

Down, Down, Down The group leaves on the morning of the 16th, a band consisting of Mirrorbound, Theodore and Sowilo from the Coven, and one of the two returned Wilders to lead the way. The latter three will only be present for the first leg of the journey: from the North Gate to the Northern Outpost by teleporter, then a few hours' hike to the site. A tunnel yawns open, fallen rocks built up around it in mounds. Everyone is offered enchanted lanterns to light the way, and their guide takes them perhaps a mile down before he and the pair from the Coven must part ways with the Mirrorbound. The poorly-lit tunnel leads steadily downward. The way is marked by their gracious hosts to be, with arrows drawn in softly-glowing algae painting the walls so there is no mistaking which way to go; a good thing, because the deeper the party goes, the more tunnels branch off of the largest one, twisting and turning into the dark. It takes some hours to reach a familiar cavern lit with algae and glowing crystals, a herd of the velvet wormipedes idly milling about the small lake and stream that led into town in the dream. Much nicer long boats are set up and waiting to take them deeper, along with respectfully quiet Monster guards to steer them. They take a slightly different route from the dream, but before long, they reach the curtain of grayish green moss that dangles down into the water, stretched across the wide tunnel exit like a membrane. It parts on its own as the boats pass, though beware if you are infected by the Cwyld - it will not allow passage, only reach out long, tough tendrils to try and envelop you, the touch of it burning acid-bright where it is harmless for those uninfected. Past the curtain of strange moss, the cavern city opens up before them, vast and spacious, dimly lit with more algae, crystals, and softly glowing orbs of magic. It's like being plunged into an eternal twilight, somehow soft, cast in gentle colors. The boats bypass the markets this time, drifting farther down a branching stream into the city proper, to dock next to stone platforms. The winding streets and flowing canals branch out all around them with no rhyme or reason, the city sprung up around the natural layout of the caverns rather than the other way around. Buildings are carved out of tall stone spires, the windows and doors covered in fluttering silk, many of which are pulled away so that fascinated locals can peer out at the scene unfolding. The Matriarch herself comes to greet the group, ringed at the back by spear-carrying guards, all Monsters. A tall, long-limbed Arachne woman bearing battle scars and stark white hair, she looks perhaps in her 30s, and speaks with a booming, commanding voice, amplified by a charm. As she speaks, ten Wilders are released from silk rope bonds and nudged to join the Mirrorbound; they're a little roughed up, perhaps, and shaken, but none are seriously injured. A few Monsters also make the rounds, placing copper tokens in the hands of ten individuals. "Welcome, travelers! This meeting was foretold and so it has come to pass. During your stay you will be treated as our honored guests. You may come and go as you please, but we ask that you use the same tunnel you entered through; we have not yet re-secured the other entrances from Cwyld nor the tribes. I would hate for danger to befall you while you are under my care." Her smile is wide, her eight eyes bright, and her teeth are very sharp. "We have prepared temporary residences for your use. I hope you will stay for the celebrations. I look forward to meeting with some of you very soon." Notably, she does not mention the surface where from the Mirrorbound came, and those around her do not ask.

I. The City The Mirrorbound receive mixed reactions from the Underground. Some are fascinated by these visitors personally invited by the Matriarch and allowed past the markets; others are wary and suspicious, believing them to be wolves in sheep's clothing. In the city proper, most passing Monsters are armed, but this doesn't seem to be anything new. Still, step cautiously - plenty do not take well to even unknowing offense and will pick a fight, or may see these guests as easy, weak targets to pickpocket or mug in the dark corners of the twisting streets. The guards only step in if things take a turn for the worse or if the fight is very obviously imbalanced - they step in more for Witches being attacked than Monsters, because they feel Witches require protection more. Still, not all are so unscrupulous: more citizens are delighted to talk, even if they still seem skeptical about a whole world up above. Mirrorbound, as guests of the Matriarch, are given nearly free run of the city, allowed to explore such locations as the marketplace, the library, the shops, the schools (the Arena for Monsters and the Academy for Witches), and the tunnels and caverns outside the protective moss barriers. The only places they (and most locals) are expressly barred from are the Matriarch's audience hall, the upper level of the library, and the guards' barracks. a. The Marketplace The marketplace is much larger than previously thought - it rings the entire city, and stalls spill onto the streets of the inner city as well in a lazy sprawl. There are some shops with actual buildings, but they're fewer and more expensive: alchemy and apothecary shops, a couple of restaurants, a weapons shop or two, nice clothing shops. Most, though, are independent merchants who set up and take down their stalls every day and night. Any number of Underground-sourced foods, clothing, weapons, trinkets, and more can be found at the stalls; they barter, or exchange chips of precious metals and gems, but they'll take cune coins with fascination. The marketplaces are the liveliest areas of the city with Monsters and Witches alike, from all walks of life, mingling and sharing gossip and idle talk. Those who lost items to the burrowing hyenas at the Northern Outpost some months ago should keep an eye out: the hyenas are fairly common down here, serving the roles of pets or working dogs for Underground citizens, and a few merchants deal in more interesting goods. The missing items can be found scattered across some stalls, and the merchants will gleefully tell perusers that these things come from the surface, aren't they fascinating? Don't you want to buy? Luckily, it shouldn't be too hard to get your things back. They'll take all manner of interesting trinkets in trade. b. Library The library is bound to be a popular stop. Monsters get some strange looks if they enter the spire just off the courtyard from the Academy, but they aren't barred from entry; most just feel that reading is for Witches. The building is only two levels - one closed off at the top, guards keeping everyone out, and the rest is just one very tall floor ringed with a spiral of platforms and stairs to access the honeycomb-shaped shelves built into the walls. All their books are written on scrolls of silk, and the librarians bark at patrons to be delicate with them, some are very old. If one has endless time, the scrolls can offer a look at life Underground: historical accounts of past Matriarchs, brave warriors and battles against nomadic tribes or hideous beasts, their history as they know it, scrolls on offensive and defensive magic for Witches, fighting techniques for Monsters, information on their unique flora and creatures that can be found outside the city, and even plenty of fiction - sword and sorcery novels all set in the tunnels and the city. It's just a bit difficult to find what, specifically, you're looking for, because if there's any kind of organization, it only makes sense to the deep-dwelling denizens. Maybe make it a team effort! You'll also need some simple translation spells, because their system of writing is quite different to the common system in Aefenglom; even then, it may not be accurate on older scrolls. c. The Guest Villa Those who choose to spend several days in the Underground are given modest accommodations in a tall stone building. These guest chambers boast gentle lighting, wide beds, backless sofas, potted decorative fungi, and stone furniture. It's... cozy, with humble individual rooms and larger common rooms for gathering. The algae grows in delicate patterns across the walls, pulsing in soft colors. They've gone out of their way to provide what comfort they can, but there aren't enough rooms for everyone to have their own - everyone will need to share with one or two others, so choose someone you can get along with.

II. The Tunnels Mirrorbound are not restricted only to the city. There are many entrances to the cavern where it resides, the openings all covered with sheets of that same gray-green moss; some wider tunnels obviously see more use than other, narrower ones, and the footpath of many Underground denizens is easy enough to trace, the stone worn smooth. The path to the velvet wormipede cavern is one of them; they're raised as livestock, all at once food, transportation, and producers of silk and hide for clothing. This is much the same as the dream. Another well-worn tunnel leads upward to an agricultural center, though, and still more lead out into the wild. They're warned, but not hindered, before they leave for anywhere other than the farms or the livestock cavern; dangers abound in the Underground. Those who do much wandering may notice something going on as well; the guards stationed at each tunnel mouth can often be found talking to each other in low voices about an unknown red algae that seems to be growing on the protective moss. It can be found primarily around the lesser-used tunnels so far, starkly bright against the dull green, and this seems to be a point of concern... a. A Botanist's Dream It's a short walk down a wide, inviting tunnel to reach the place where the city grows fungi and underground plants for food and medicine. Large rats and hyenas both are present to keep opportunist creatures and insects from demolishing the carefully-cultivated beds of rock and soil, and small blind fish swim about in the large pool of shallow water, in which grows something like seaweed. One of their primary sources of food, besides bug and rat, are mushrooms of many sorts - all the types that grow in the farms are edible, though some may be an... acquired taste. The Fauns and Witches who tend the beds are happy to offer samples of anything that can be eaten raw; they're most enthusiastic about a type of spherical mushroom whose cap opens up to reveal what tastes and feels like savory cotton candy, and a type of flat fungi that tastes sweet and fizzy and offers a heightened good mood for an hour after. b. The Wild Underground The lesser used tunnels are a different story. A mile out from the city, Cwyld runs in thick black veins through the stone walls, infecting the sparse plants and many creatures that live out there. Careful not to touch. Infected and uninfected creatures both are highly dangerous to explorers, including stone-burrowing moles with wicked teeth and claws that can cut through metal like butter, vicious white wasps that carry lethal venom, and berserker vampire bats that survive on the blood of other animals and people alike. Some infected fungi give off blindingly-bright flashes when disturbed, while others will cause rashes and blisters on contact. Explorers are warned not to touch anything if they can help it. As well, the nomad tribes roam the less-civilized tunnels and caverns. These are small bands of usually Monsters of different types in mixed groups, though some can be found dragging humans along with them. Nearly all of them are some degree of feral, and plenty bear Cwyld infections in different stages of seriousness. They don't stop to ask questions before they'll attack anyone, including each other, in hopes of robbing them blind and leaving them for dead. As vicious and quick as they are, perhaps it's no wonder they value strength in the city?

III. Graduation Day (21st - 23rd) The Underground does not have 'Litha' as Aefenglomites know it, but come the 21st, they do have a major celebration. They simply call it the New Year, or Graduation Day, depending on what festivities are asked about, because the three days serve as both. At this time of year, with more magic in the air, the algae and crystals glow much brighter, cycling naturally through different colors that cast beautiful rainbows across the imposing stone structures. This display is how they mark the start of a new year, and it coincides with the graduation of young Monsters from the Arena and Witches from the Academy. The New Year is a time to celebrate Bonding, partying, and showing off one's skills in the hopes of attracting a new Bondmate or romantic partner. Tensions can also rise high as rivalries are settled, and small brawls in the streets are common; the guards don't interfere, again, unless things get too dangerous. They're content to let citizens work out their own issues, but unfortunately, this means Mirrorbound may get dragged in on occasion! Small fights are also a tried and true tradition to show off one's abilities around this time of year. It serves multiple purposes: attracting a Bondmate, establishing a place in the unspoken hierarchy of the city, and working out problems with others. Monsters are more likely to start brawls than Witches, though it isn't wholly uncommon to bear witness to two rival Witches throwing spells at each other in an alleyway over their grievances. They're more likely to be stopped, as magic can be quite destructive. a. A Matching Pair The un-Bonded should take precautions during the New Year celebrations. These fascinating newcomers are bound to draw the eye of curious locals, and they may put on a violent or flashy show trying to draw your attention in return! The most common way to show that you're already taken during the celebrations is with face-painting: several stands set up around the marketplace with cosmetics and brushes, and two (or three, or more) people painting matching designs on their faces and bodies signify them as a set - either Bonded or intending to Bond. That doesn't mean there won't still be competition for your heart, but it will lessen significantly, especially if you're a Monster-Witch pair already. b. Exhibitions Primarily intended for the graduating classes of Monsters and Witches, the exhibitions are an official stage set for their coming-of-age; this year, however, the Matriarch has decreed that Mirrorbound may participate as well, in the interests of getting to know one another! They're interested to see what these strange travelers can do, especially against some of their own. Mirrorbound are encouraged by excitable locals if they seem reticent, but of course, no one is forced. (Just don't be surprised if you're called a coward for refusing!) At the Arena, a massive sunken ring with stone benches for spectators ringing the whole of it, young Monsters learn combat skills, with and without weapons, and how to harness their unique physiologies in the dangerous world of the Underground. Their yearly exhibition fights take place all through the three days of the New Year, and young Monsters battle each other til first blood to the cheers and jeers of citizens (and more importantly, Witches) come to watch. The longer the battle, the more impressive it is - and Monster Mirrorbound will have no shortage of eager opponents wanting to test their skills against the unknown. Generally, the fights result in bruises, small cuts, and little else, but rivals for the same Witch might take it farther on purpose before they're wrenched away from each other by the teachers. Meanwhile, at the Academy, the tallest stone spire building in the city, young Witches learn magic from a young age. It isn't exactly the same as magic taught at the Coven, but many concepts are similar - barriers, evocation, enchantments meant for weapons or shields, healing, most of the magic they're taught at this younger age is for combat, protection or practical purposes. They only learn more frivolous magics after graduation. Much like their Monster counterparts, they give solo or duet shows of their flashier and more impressive magical skills in the courtyard, with many citizens coming to watch and take stock of the new generation. Mirrorbound Witches may find themselves being cajoled into putting on a show of their own by curious locals wanting to know what kinds of magic are taught elsewhere.

IV. Aefenglom - Litha (21st - 23rd) Meanwhile, for those who have chosen to stay above-ground or those who have left early, Litha comes once more to Aefenglom, bringing with it beautiful pink and purple skies, a far departure from last year's red tint. It has the city in a much cheerier mood for the celebrations. While they know that several Mirrorbound left for a while, they don't seem too aware of the actual mission, and have very little to say on the matter - they'd rather have a nice Litha, after last year's bad omens! Many of the activities from last year return, better than before, including the brothels opening up their doors (showing off all the wonderful new styles in lingerie!), collecting flowers to put under one's pillow in order to dream of future partners, and wandering the hedge mazes that have been magically constructed in certain parts of the city. Seeing off ships happens regularly as well, citizens setting floating candles into the harbor and river to wish them luck. a. Love Boats A new attraction for Litha is being rolled out this year right on the River Temese! Near the gate, an enterprising Faun has set up a few small boats, each just big enough for two and shielded with fine gauzy curtains for privacy. Couples are invited to buy a ride down the river together, assured it will certainly set the mood. Those who have no partners are offered (or cajoled) to be randomly paired with someone, because perhaps it's fate! The boats drift lazily down the river and stop on their own next to a small dock right before they reach the Harbor. Unless you're willing to swim, hopefully you like your boat partner, because you're stuck with them the whole ride. b. Predictive Pools One bathhouse in the Entertainment District has laid an enchantment on one of their semi-public baths for Litha. When two people stand in the water together, bare, it will begin to glow and take on one of a handful of colors that they say will predict the pair's compatibility level! Sexually, romantically? Well, why not both? The only thing is, they've lost the instructions, and cannot seem to remember what color means "most compatible" and what color means "not compatible at all"... As a reminder, all sexual content should be clearly marked in comment headers, or else moved to a comm-locked log or personal inbox! Be good to each other.

Welcome to June's Event Log, What Lies Beneath! The Underground will be open until mid-July at minimum, and possibly longer. Characters can come and go if they're willing to make the trip multiple times. As always, please direct your questions here! The NPC threads will take place here. Aaand, the Action Tracker is right here! Make sure to let us know what your characters have been up to, good and bad, by July 7th, as this will help determine how Mirrorbound-Underground relations might proceed in the future!

Comments

[moustre]

The Matriarch hums, a thoughtful noise as she puts together what she wishes to say. "Straight to the point indeed," she says, drumming her claws. "Your people were the first from the surface in hundreds of years to see our city, in a dream, which was quite unexpected. Do all Mirrorbound have the talent for dreamwalking? Hm. You learned of us first, however. I wish to learn of you. Whether you are enemies or allies."

It isn't the full answer, judging from the careful way she puts her sentences together, but it's enough to begin with. Honest enough.

"I do not wish to deal with others yet. Your existence, those of you aboveground, alive and well, are a surprise to my people." But not wholly to her, perhaps? "They must... adjust, to certain concepts."

[recklessbelief]

Yeah, that was pretty cool! I haven't been trying anything like that yet. I've been more focused on transforming myself. [She places a hand on her chest in subtle emphasis.] I'm not nearly that as far along with it as that though. I still have to be really close to whoever I'm trying to copy or think about them really hard.

[And that level of concentration makes it a little hard to think about doing anything other than just standing still if she can't see her target.]

Where'd you get the idea for butterflies?

[recklessbelief]

Okay, [Akko says with a nod. It's officially a judgment-free zone because even if he wasn't actually inviting the help, he sure has now by not telling her to mind her own business. And she can't be helpful she's going to judge him for struggling a little with figuring out what to get someone.] The easiest place to start is to think about what the person likes.

So what do you know about them?

library

[piromare]

( ah yes, a good place for scrolls to be! on the floor, where no one is going to trip and fall or step on any with bird-like talons. definitely not going to happen, except for the part where it does happen and the first sound coming out of lio's mouth is a sharp gasp as he trips.

the second sound is a single word: curt and punctuated. )

Shit!

( and finally, the third is him flailing as he tries to catch himself from falling. thankfully he succeeds at that, banging his elbow on a table. )

Who put that those there...?!

( his wings twitch and flutter, mirroring his exasperation. )

followin that red algae thread...

[faithlikeaseed]

Excellent; taking home a hatchling it is.

I note in the answers to Hector, the moss has some kind of tropism to the red algae when the red algae's nearby, but doesn't consume it. Does moss affected by the red algae still react to the presence of the Cwyld? Myr isn't currently infected but he did have an infection previously, so would moss with the algae still reach for him?

Will affected moss still consume corpses/the dying if they're offered?

Does affected moss seem any different to a Faun's plant-communion, vs unaffected?

[piromare]

A Puca? ( a beat, then: ) Oh! Like... a rabbit.

( he's met one before, and the recognition alone brightens lio up considerably even before he walks in. it's warm and inviting, comfortable and somewhere that he could see himself truly enjoying with a friend. however, the one thing lio notices is a lack of elevated places for him to settle on, but that's fine. he doesn't plan on getting in anyone's way, and certainly not vanitas'.

he gets lio's respect, among other things. )

I won't overstay my welcome. Are they your bonded?

[stardustish]

Those sentences are, indeed, constructed very carefully. Sylvia's not one to talk, though, because she's also making an attempt to do the same. It's not working out as well for her but the sentiment is there.

"I see. ... You know, that's actually a good question -- the dreamwalking part." She hums thoughtfully. It might have been a rhetorical question, maybe, but it's an interesting one all the same. Some food for thought for later.

"My next question is, well, you see... You want to learn about us and potentially make us your allies, right?" She's deliberately leaving out enemies, here. "So why did you act with aggression towards the Wilders? Was there a reason for kidnapping them and only releasing two of them?"

[piromare]

( oh... goodbye butterflies. they were beautiful. still, he can't keep his focus on them when he has sora here. )

No, but it still seems useful. ( he pauses, before rubbing the back of his head. ) Sorry if I interrupted you.

( lio frowns, huffing. )

I wonder if I can do something similar.

[stardustish]

[ sylvia's nose-deep into a scroll about monster fighting techniques and does not notice anyone tripping until she hears a gasp. she immediately lifts her head up, rabbit ears turning towards the sound, and -- ]

Oh -- Lio?!

[ well, that's not good, sylvia steps over a small pile of scrolls and puts a hand on his shoulder to steady him. her other hand rubs the back of her head sheepishly. ]

Haha, that was me! I'm sorry about that! Are you okay?

[peacewithouttyranny]

Hm, it isn't. If I were to make a similar comparison, it would be like living entirely off... junk food. Or alcohol.

[Another huff.]

But it isn't as unpleasant as starving. I've had my... moments with that.

[unyieldingmarch]

Not yet. Though I'm sure if we look hard enough, we'll find them.

[She shakes her head at his question, but sets her jaw all the same.]

I'll go with you then. With your nose and my hearing, we should be able to find it quickly.

[And if it's a threat, then it is better to deal with it quickly, as a unit.]

[strongspirited]

...Late afternoon?

[She shakes her head.]

I came down here at ten at night...

[Her stomach burbles.]

...Hell. I really must have been exhausted.

[eluci]

[Well that was a mistake! It gets him to back down pretty quickly, though...if Elliot's afraid of it just existing near him, it's probably bad that he's pissed it off.]

I see that! [He makes a show of stuffing the knife back in his satchel, putting his hands up, and flattening his ears, just in case the plant cares about any of that.] No cutting. Not even any claws. Just let us through?

[scatmaam]

I've been in a great many wars and conflicts, and faced a great many enemies who did not treat their prisoners so humanely as this... [ A long sigh. ]

But my people, they are a warlike lot, I suppose... And distrusting of outsiders.

As they should have been, as history long proved.

[moustre]

"Perhaps, if worthy allies you would make," she agrees, gesturing vaguely with one clawed hand. Her eight legs shift a little beneath her, idly.

If she had eyebrows, they would lift, but it's really more like a slight upward twitch of her eight eyes all at once. "Is it aggression to stop trespassers from entering your territory? From potentially threatening your caverns and your creatures, your people? Two were released to carry a message and the rest held on my orders, yes, but they were treated well enough. My predecessor would have killed them outright."

Clearly the Matriarch feels she is the more progressive sort.

[stardustish]

regarding the matriarch's predecessor: what information about them is available? i.e. what sort of ruler were they, etc.

(sorry, just saw the answer regarding how this matriarch came into power!)

forgot to add that sylvia would've been looking in the library, but if there are any other ways (i.e. hearsay) that this info would be available for the mirrorbound then i'd like to know those too! thank you!

[beariot]

It's really late, though... I'm not sure there's a lot of options this time of night.

... Or morning.


Actually I have no idea what time of day it is. Huh.

[scatmaam]

Fascinating, isn't it? Doesn't taste a damn thing how it looks. I'll bet you could brew some interesting spirits from it...

[ Not that it'd shift her tastes from her beloved scotch, but she couldn't help but be curious. ]

[marmoron]

[ Ah. He register's Momo's familiarity with the word "Altean" though it doesn't necessarily surprise him; it just comes part and parcel with having two friends who are far more social than yourself. If anything, it gets Keith to relax a little further because Lance and Allura would have absolutely mentioned and described any bad eggs they've met here. ]

You never know. It might not even taste much like bug. These fungi apparently taste like cotton candy.

[ Which he sounds doubtful about. ]

And yeah, I am. I'm Keith. You're friends with them then?

[crowsfeat]

It may so... but we also might be more trouble than it's willing to go through for a meal.

[ Eileen didn't flinch at the beast's gaze, keeping her blades steady before her, more than ready to give it several more cuts to lick if it dared attack again. She didn't like the idea of killing it, if it could be avoided, but...

She didn't have a lot of techniques that wouldn't spell death for this creature if it kept attacking them. ]

[scatmaam]

I know you can. [ The woman responded, staying near him, keeping her eyes trained to the area around them, scanning, searching, not trusting at all for that to be the last of their troubles... ]

It was not for your sake I acted, but that of the one who attacked you. [ A small hum. ]

But I'm not a teacher, any longer. I suppose I should remind myself that more often...

[marmoron]

I've only ever been in one war. The enemy have this saying. "Victory or death." YOu can imagine how receptive they were to negotiating.

[ He shifts a little on the ground, though there aren't really many ways to make a stone floor more comfortable to sit on. ]

What happened to your people? If that's not too invasive.

[silentsavant]

[The Dragon lets him close as much distance as he pleases for the sake of the act, however big his personal space bubble requirements are. There is a silent mutual understanding that it comes with a purpose, and with that, he accepts without a hitch. It's not like Momo is pushing it with him, either. He shoots a final ocular dagger over his shoulder at the monsters in their wake and spreads his black and crimson wing out to 'shelter' him from their view. His Witch, not theirs. They don't follow, but they're not happy to lose their catch.

Soren keeps his voice hovering at about the same volume, which is easy because his voice has never been naturally loud or obtrusive.]

In their own way. But I'd rather be a Monster than a Witch in this scenario. [The Monsters tend more insufferable to deal with, as demonstrated by their overwhelming interest in Momo... though they're also a headache to deal with as a Monster for other reasons. Soren sighs.] I would simply like to browse the shops in peace without being annoyed about the same thing every few minutes. You've already guessed why I pulled you out of there, so my next proposition shouldn't be hard to figure out, either. If we stay together, you can keep Witches out of my hair, and I'll keep Monsters off your back.

[Because yes: first and foremost, it was all a matter of self-interest. Being able to help another Mirrorbound out in the process was just a bonus. Soren wants to fake a relationship with you for a while! And it's never bad to get to know Witches around here, should one be a suitable prospect for a real Bond down the line.]

[needsteaplz]

Probably, yeah.

[She nods, making sure not to mention the possibility it was probably both predatory animals at work as crocodiles and foxes are good at ambushes. While one hand lingers on his, she gently reaches for his cheek with the other.]

Oh, Hector, I'm so sorry. Please, let me make it up to you somehow. Is there anything you'd like me to do for you during this festival maybe?

ii.

[unsundered]

[Technically Emet-Selch fulfills all those criteria. That's not why he's responding, though (well, not entirely, anyway). Idle curiosity, perhaps.]

Generally speaking, one attempts to hide their ill-purpose underneath a less ominous messaging.

Unless your intent was to filter out all but the most credulous... or honest. In which case, I've no doubt you'll manage to ensnare a few unfortunates to your cause.