middaeg | April Showers Brings Naps [Open Catchall Log]

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ffxiv: mira chambers

April Showers Brings Naps [Open Catchall Log]

Who: Mira and OPEN
When: Throughout April
Where: Aefenglom, outside the city
What: Catchall log, quests for the month, Dream a Little Dream event
Warnings: Bar brawl, violence, Dark Knight 50 and 70 spoilers, some Shadowbringers Spoilers

Rule--Be Nice: The Sly Seadog

[A simple job and one Mira is a bit used to. An extent of it at least; the Slydog asked for extra bouncers around due to more sailors coming around and Mira having done her share of escorts and guarding could handle a few drunkards if they get too roudy. Some regulars knew her as the woman who threw a man out the door in the literal sense for annoying her while reading so imagine when she comes in on her shift after working at the potion shop with Shadowbringer on her back and all is well.

For a time.

From the corner of her eye, Mira catches two sailors, clearly four sheets to the wind and starting raising their voices at each other. Oh boy, this does not sound good.]

Daft sods.

[She rolls her eyes and stroll right over, tapping one of them on the shoulder.]

Ease up on the shouting, don't wanna do poorly on the owner's hospitality.

[That just earns a laugh out of him and his comrade. Just be nice, Mira.]

Oi oi, lookat this sweet lil thing thinking she can speak up!

I'm sorry but there are others patrons here wishing to enjoy their drinks in peace. 'Twould be disrespectful to shatter it.

[Spoken calmly but firm, which only gets the patron laughing more.]

Listen, sweetheart. Why don't you go trot your nice arse to the keep and bring us another round. I'll be sure to give you a great tip if you decide to come after I leave.

[Mira's about to retort until she feels a hard slap to her rear, both men laughing at her reaction. Apparently these two are so wasted that they forgot that she has a sword strapped to her back. Someone...should probably step in since her hand is going straight for the blade. Fuck being nice..]

Too Many Books: Streets of Aefenglom

[When she's not working, one of Mira's hobbies is reading anything she can get her hands on. While stories and fairytales are her favorites, she's not focused on that right now. Nor is she focused on her magical studies. Tucked under each arm are bags with several books from the library that she could carry and all each have a theme to them: sleep.

But she's not looking to try and sleep herself, she's looking for any mentions of any kind of sickness where sleep is a key factor. Sounds weird, doesn't it. She doesn't even realize that in her distracted mind, she almost runs into someone and manages to twirl away just to not hit them.]

Oh dammit, my apologies! You alright?

Storytime: Outside the City

Bloody hells, are any of these tales even good?

[The last time Mira was out here, she had to carry the Crystal Exarch back to the city because his dumb butt wasn't feeling so good. But now she's alone in this endeavor and she had an idea to try and work on something she brought up: finding some kind of purpose outside of her duties as a Warrior of Light. Mira's thought maybe trying her hand at something she enjoyed might point her in a proper direction. That is until she saw the books around for the storytime and reacted in the most calm and rational manner: making a strongly opposed face.]

Ok, I understand they might be children but honestly, they are much more intelligent than this. And I can't tell them all my adventuring stories!

[Shit, what is she going to do?]

Dream A Little Dream

[It pulls you in, a tug as you look through the mirrors within the house. And yet one in particular shows itself to be a bit decorative in its etchings. On each side of the mirror, three symbols will be carved in: a handgun on the left, a peculiar symbol on the right, and a sword from the top.

As for the bottom, a message woven, perhaps unknown to those who haven't walked the path.

"In your darkest hour, in the blackest night..."

Words that may mean something to the owner of this mirror. But as you peek in, the urge gets stronger and stronger until you find yourself sucked in and watching something come out. Question is...which memory of the woman are you seeing?]

((OOC: Dream Prompts will be listed in the comments below.))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...I do in the end.

[It's always her that makes the impacting blow, the one who finishes them off after beating on the enemy for a time. It's her who does it. It's Mira who usually stands up even when thrown down over and over again. Even when the Light very nearly took her, she stood up with help from Ardbert. But they were one and the same, weren't they?]

It's always me who does it.

[But why? Why always her? Does Hydaelyn only truly see her as her blade?]

Exactly.

[ Vanitas' interest in the battle is only mild at best. Again, Mira is going to win this so is there really even a point? The only benefit to watching is seeing the different abilities that she once had. She no longer processes them here. ]

But you won't stop, will you?

I can't stop. If I do, people will die. There is no one else with my same skillset...

[There are those with the Echo but her particular gift? In her version, it's just her.]

A skillset they'll never acquire if you continue to do everything for them, Mira.

[ People can't grow stronger if constantly coddled. ]

And how will they? Hydaelyn only seems to want to focus on me, not any others gifted with the Echo.

[Arenvald in Ala Mhigo, Krile taking medical duty in the Scions. Both have the Echo and aren't tasked with saving so many shards like her.]

So what makes me different compared to them? Why am I the one who ends up becoming her errand girl?! Pretty damn sure there would be others jumping at the chance to do some good! So why am I usually on the front lines being asked to give succor? I care about people without a doubt but must I be pulled in so many directions?!

[...how long has she kept that hidden?]

So why me?

[ Vanitas doesn't look shocked at her outburst. He's not alarmed or surprised. No, there's a bit of a feral grin that starts to spread across his features. Finally! Mira really needs to get all of that out of her system. It's a shame that Vanitas cannot provide some sort of answer or even comfort. He can't really commiserate either. ]

Maybe because you just stepped up when called? Because you've done so without thought or minimal complaint until just this moment?

So has everyone else!

[Her voice gets higher as she clenches her fists.]

There has been no one that I have known with the same power that has decided to squander it. Every person I know does something and yet out of everyone it's me that has to shoulder the lives of millions of people! To keep them safe and out of harm's way but what happens when the one who needs help IS the hero?!

She ends up saving everyone anyway! Because of some higher power decided that 'oh it will be fine!' but in reality, it's not! The last one who did something other than me gave her life to stop the Flood in the First from spreading along with four others! Is that all we're good for?! Do the task then discarded after we're done?!

[She can feel herself get lightheaded and falls to her knees.]

Sorry. None of that is directed at you. I'm just...tired.

Edited 2020-04-19 01:33 (UTC)

[ Nonsense, Mira. Vanitas is listening. He knows that none of this is aimed at him. This is all of the pent of frustration and irritation finally coming to the surface. Mira's discontentment and justified anger at her situation is being made known. There is no reason for him to be offended or put out.

Instead he kneels right in front of her. Van shakes his head. ]

Tired of being treated like a thing. Exhausted because you've released all of this crap you've just smiled and nodded at while secretly boiling inside. Don't ever apologize for this, Mira. You need it.

I...

[She takes a ragged breath and lifts her head up slightly at her son. He's still here after all her words? Even if not directed at him, she didn't think...]

I'm not just some tool to be discarded after everything is done. Don't I breathe and live like everyone else? Don't I deserve to know why it's me that has to go through all of this?

[ Vanitas is careful, see. He reaches for Mira's hand. Goes to give it a squeeze. Should help calm her down, right? ]

I'd say that you do. You're owed answers. All of you are.

[She does get tense at first but it's Vanitas. She did the same for him before and relaxes as she takes it in return.]

Aye, we are.

[ As long as she is taking a moment to breathe. Mira's gotten quite worked up and Vanitas is okay with that anger. He has no problems with it and believes that she deserves to hold onto it for as long as she wants. However, the Dark Knight doesn't need to work herself up and then fall apart.

Not here anyway. ]

Guess you'll have to wait for a bit though. You're stuck here for who knows how long.

Mayhap even years.

[Has the memory stopped playing? She can't recall because everything else has gotten so quiet. Casting her eyes back towards the scene, she sees that her memory self and Fray stay standing but Myste defeated. That's how it goes and she's not sure what else is there to see. Maybe.]

...it's gotten calmer I suppose.

[ Likely just the conclusion on how this all plays out? The rejoining of two halves? That make Vanitas feel a little bitter. Seems like it is so much easier for everyone but himself. ]

That's usually what happens after a fight, isn't it? Things calm down?

[It simply just needs to be watched. The memory of Mira stands along with Fray, still in battle stance while Myste falls to the ground on his knees, looking downwards as specks of blue aether surround him.]

Forgive me, forgive me...I ask, I beg, I pray...but it never comes. Again they go to join the multitude in the black oblivion of the abyss...

[And as he speaks and swords are set aside, tears fall from his eyes. But it is Fray, they too being surrounded by the same blue aether, slowly walks to the boy.]

Such as our lot. Such is the fate of all who are born--to suffer and die. Do not seek forgiveness, for it will not ease the burden. It weighs as it should.

[And Mira herself grows quiet. There's always that small part of her who wonders if she should...but there's a point to it, isn't there? It weighs as it should.]

Edited 2020-04-25 21:41 (UTC)

[ Alongside Mira, Vanitas watches the scene play out. This is the conclusion. Two halves ready to join. Again, if only it were truly so easy... ]

You know. This Fray part of you actually speaks sense. I think you should listen to him more often than what you do.

It sounds easy but when what you want conflicts with how you feel like should act, it gets messy.

[They're taught to forgive and give it. That they need to otherwise they wouldn't be a good person. Ever since childhood, that's what they learn. Mira knows some matters are not worth forgiveness but for herself? That's where it gets murky.]

But what of the lost? Do they not deserve to live again?

[The child asks the man, eyes pleading when his words cannot. However, the knight does not answer...but it is a new voice that speaks up that answers, the young elezen girl who had woken and now stands to face Myste.]

They do. In our hearts and our souls and our memories. No one likes to say good bye. But it's...it's part of life. That's what makes the time we share more precious...

[And it's the same girl who looks sternly at him, nay, determined to keep her ground.]

You can't obsess over the mistakes of the past, or you'll lose sight of the future. Of the people who are still with us, who need us more than ever.

[Beside her, Sid stands. "The greatest strength is born in the flame of the abyss..." he adds as Myste looks between them and the memory of Mira standing further away with a hand on her hip, a ghost of a small smile on her lips as the boy looks down again with Fray speaking up.]

Listen to my voice. Listen to my heartbeat. Listen...

I forgive you. I forgive you. I forgive you...

That makes no sense to me.

[ Nor should it, really. Vanitas hadn't been "raised" under such conventions. Rather he had been "taught" that what he wants and how he feels about things are just how he is. It's part of his nature and thus why shouldn't he act on what he feels? He had never considered things like forgiveness because forgiveness is wasted and not needed.

So none of this really makes much sense to him, really. At least the forgiveness and needing to seek it or be granted it. Vanitas understands the concept well enough. Though he's never really saw the need to ask anyone to forgive him for what he's done. Primarily because he's never been sorry for what he chooses to do.

Though he does understand that those that are gone can still live on within others. That's how connections work. That's how the heart works. ]

...Was all this really necessary?

If I was a normal person who knew how to deal with her feelings given that it seems every time I push them down they react like this, possibly. Strange how looking from another view makes what one had lived through feel different.

[Shouldn't it be if living through it, that it would sink in? No, not in this case. She needed to remember how Myste's words, her own words reflect on her own state of mind. How Fray's own needed to make her look on what she has to do for herself. It's both a reminder and realization on how much had changed and what did while in this place. Has she lost herself along the way? Was she asking for forgiveness here? For what exactly? Why show her this dream? Or the one prior?

Was it because of what happened? Is her memories trying to tell her something?]

Thank you. That is...that is all I ever wanted.

[Myste looks up at Fray with those sad lonely eyes and there's a calm after the storm. The knight nods as the boy stands up and looks at Mira shyly.]

So...this is it. One last parting. One final farewell...after a fashion.

[And then, he shuts his eyes with a smile on his face.]

In your darkest hour, in the blackest night...think of me...and I will be with you. Always. For where else could I go? Who else could I love but you?

[With that said, both Fray and Myste face in Mira's direction and walk step in step with each other, both going past her memory self who doesn't look back but instead keeps looking forward as both vanish into the aether, the dark knight looking up to reflect and remember.

And it's there that the memory ends, leaving Mira and Vani alone.]

[ Such a strange occurrence all around, really. Vanitas knows that he really has no room to talk. It isn't as though his emotions don't manifest either or something like that, right? He just watches the rest of the scene play out without any comment.

When the memory ends, they are standing out there. Standing once more in front of all those mirrors. What else can be said?]

When did all this happen, Mira?

..it was before I went to the First. Around the time the Scions and I helped liberate a city-state named Ala Mhigo from the Garlean Empire.

[You know, the one empire Emet created out of how many?]

Moons ago. Back when I had to worry about facing the bloodthirsty crown Garlean prince instead of shards and consuming Light.

[Don't ask her about Zenos. He's...weird.]

I would think that dealing with empires and princes is easier than the life and death of an entire Shard's worth of people.

[ Oh he wants to ask, Mira. He might still ask soon. ]

Looking back...yes, it was.

[When it was easier to see the ascians as simply the enemy to be stopped. To just handle some horrible empire and how simple it all was. She should say that it was better then...but Mira would be lying to herself. Someone who looks for the truth even in the faerie tales and legends of old, it would be lying to herself wouldn't it?

But these memories, harsh as they are, makes Mira think and ponder. Was it possible here...?]

Would you rather go back to that? Back to sticking your nose in politics instead of knowing what your enemies true goals are?

[ Figures he can ask. ]

I said it was easier, not that it was better.

[A lot of matters would have been easier, to have her look the other way when something else was growing stronger. But if there's something from these memories she will take away (and there's a lot but this nugget seems important) from here, it's Rielle's words.

"You can't obsess over the mistakes of the past, or you'll lose sight of the future."

To not look back, thinking what could have been done to change obsessively, but recall the times where both good and bad happened. To learn from those mistakes and look back on the fond moments that shape someone.]

Besides, I would be lying to myself if I didn't follow something I had always strived for: knowing the truth even if painful.

assume the ShB spoilers, kids

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