middaeg | [OPEN] The Stars, The Moon, They Have All Been Blown Out

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[OPEN] The Stars, The Moon, They Have All Been Blown Out

Who: L Lawliet and YOU (some open prompts, some semi-open)
When: Octeuril 21 through the end of the month
Where: Around Geardagas
What: Waking up to find that he doesn't have permanent severe brain damage is tempered by realizing and processing that his Bonded actually does.
Warnings: References to violent events, angst, will update if necessary

A. Octeuril 21, The Cottage (Open to residents, visitors and healers)

[It's been a week since Myr's desperate attack had thrown blackout curtains over L's senses and thoughts, further complicated by the violent fundamental alteration of his Bonded. He'd received prompt healing to his head and ribs that made the overall prognosis hopeful, and has been cared for and kept comfortable enough, but the fact of the matter is that Connor woke up, and then the SQUIP, but trailing behind them, L just didn't. Frequent doses of healing magic can help, but not change, the fact that the brain is complex and fragile, and rebuilding and repairing it can take time with even skilled and careful intervention.

For seven days and nights, he's been sleeping it off, recuperating in the quiet and subtle ways that make the biggest collective difference. Eventually, the culmination amounts to "enough", and with no trigger, catalyst or warning, he sits up in bed with no memory of how he got there.

So, start from the beginning.

Who? The SQUIP. Rich. Niles, Michael, Jeremy, Connor and Justine. Myr.

What? The Bond is different. The Bond has changed. The SQUIP has changed.

Where? Just outside. There was blood on the pavement.

When? Too long ago. So much has happened.

Why? It had to be stopped.

How? Fingertips explore the tender place where a skull was broken, has begun to mend in earnest. Clear enough, somehow... with no small measure of disquietment, L understands that he should probably be a vegetable. Someone, or several someones, have been working on ensuring that he woke up with the one thing he couldn't live without intact. How long is the list of names? How many people does L theoretically owe his life to, now?]

Is someone there?

[A week in bed has him anxious to get to his feet again, but... oh, slow, it's a head rush just to put them on the floor while he remains seated. He's hungry, and though either magic or gentle attentive hands have been keeping his body free of grime, he wants to bathe badly.]

Please tell me what's happened.

[He'll settle for anyone, the first person he lays eyes on. Friend or foe, he has to know; he isn't usually the last, this way.]

B. The Coven (Open)

[Getting back to some semblance of an ordinary life means returning to old familiar habits. The things that L's grey matter remembers so well it's second nature are, quite simply, folding into the sanctuary of committed study, and while the new and far more human SQUIP needs him in ways it didn't used to, that's still overwhelming. Latching onto L as a fellow human who can guide it through this transition is a mistake; whether or not it's a birthright, L was never very good at being human. It's the reason he considered a machine safe, and now that it's distraught and tormented and volatile, all on account of its reaction to his injury.

Books and scrolls are stacked high at his side, and he's working on a new set of runes. A jeweler's magnifying lens is held against his eye as he carefully etches them into pieces of scrap metal bent into the crude shape of a ring. These are just practice goes, of course, but some of them are promising. He places them in one pile; a far larger pile of rejects is littering the floor around the legs of his chair.

He glances your way, shoulders curling, seeming to grow a touch more protective of his work. Lately, he can only assume that others want to take things from him that bring him some small semblance of happiness.]

C. The Sly Seadog- Samuin (Open)

[Then, of course, there are the things that are not familiar at all. A mind is more than just a collection of memories and compiled facts; it has to adapt and respond and arrange data into solutions, and while working in a controlled and quiet environment is one way to test that, L can't think of a better scenario than this one to put himself through his paces.

The SQUIP can't help him the way it used to. He feels, in many ways, like a child about to cross the street for the first time without holding his caretaker's hand.]

Buy me a shot of liquor.

[He's addressing you. Maybe you know each other and he genuinely feels you owe it to him; maybe you're strangers and he is just testing the baseline for any kind of natural charisma he may possess in this capacity. Either way, he's getting some looks from a few of the bar's rowdier-looking individuals, and deigns to add]

...please.

D. WILDCARD

[Don't see it? Want it? Well, COOL, in all likelihood I do too but just didn't think to include it. Write your own prompt and I'll roll with it, or hit me up on plurk at lexil or on discord at ladylazarus#2235!]

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Clippy might offer. Clippy might say something like...

[He considers, swirling the ice in his glass. Don't classy men ask for whiskey with no ice? No one told either Jeremy or L.]

"Your participles are really dangling. Do you want me to help you with that?" Or, "it looks like you're writing a cover letter, can I get under it?" Or...

[He frowns, with all the countenance of someone who is really above this but too proud of his wit to keep it to himself.]

"Wrap your ellipsis around my copular verb until I comma on your preface."

[He finishes the whiskey quickly and orders two more.]

It's sex. It's not some kind of video game. What does that even mean? "Move your dick thirty degrees left?" Is it rotation or an angle? Is it fully immersed or exposed? Are you a virgin or do you just really like to sound like one?

[He puts more cune on the bar in the "Jeremy pile." It's clear that he's treating it as a swear jar of sorts, just for insults.]

Edited 2019-10-28 00:22 (UTC)

[Jeremy's speechless again for a minute.

That is exactly the kind of joke that might make Christine giggle uncontrollably but it flies over Jeremy's head gracelessly.]

The SQUIP said everything was a video game.

[He slunk down in his seat, putting his hands in his pockets. He knows, objectively, L having sex with the SQUIP and sharing Clippy porn lines is way worse than Jeremy being a virgin, but it's a touchy subject for him. His face goes scarlet fast.]

If all you wants is tips on s-seducing the SQUIP, I don't have anything for you. Sorry. It sounds like yours and mine aren't even the same entity.

[L's not a man who blushes; he gives impressions of unbelievable innocence or spectacular jadedness, but not much in-between. Either way, his cheeks look bloodless and gaunt.]

Well if the SQUIP used a framing device to help you understand something, it must be true. Maybe if we convert these cune to quarters and cram them in that slot in the bartender's face, we can win the grand prize of a blowjob and you'll find out what all the fuss is about.

[It's probably pretty clear that L's had too much to drink too quickly. He sighs raggedly and shoves a few more cune on the pile. His next words are muttered low.]

I really don't want to be mean to you. And seducing it isn't exactly my problem.

Edited 2019-10-28 00:38 (UTC)

[The text Rich had received was instantly worrying. A message sent to all three of the people Jeremy seemed to trust in the town was obviously a call for help, and Rich can guess who the "creepy guy" Jeremy is referring to is.

He's faster than he normally would be. The new pair of wings certainly help speed up the process (Rich notes that his wingspan doesn't quite seem large enough to carry him, but shrugs it off because nothing in this damn world makes sense, and he kind of wonders if it'd just piss Linden off anyways).

When he gets to the bar, tracking Jeremy down is easy, and it's a wonder he doesn't barrel in with fists raised as soon as he spots the man he's sitting next to. Instinct would dictate that was the best course of action... but Rich knows how the SQUIP worked on everyone here...

If Rich had deserved a second chance, surely Linden deserves the same. Or at least some basic human decency.

He's still nothing if not a tad overprotective of Jeremy, though, especially as he hears how crudely L is speaking, and so he moves to stand in between their chairs, pushing the money Linden had on the table back towards him.]

If you don't want to be mean, you might want to stop drinking. You sound nastier than I do.

[As much as is physically possible, Jeremy sinks lower in the chair. He doesn't know Rich as well as Rich knows him, thanks to the odd timelines here, but he knows Rich has a bad view of alcohol as a coping mechanism. Sure, he was the one who told Rich where he was, but it feels like Rich is coming in here to bust him for drinking.

It's not like he has an excuse. With L acting this way, it's obvious that Jeremy's made another of his infamous bad decisions despite his best efforts.]

H-hey, Rich...

[His voice is weak. He looks immediately to L, trying to figure out what kind of encounter this'll be.]

I didn't ask him to come, I promise.

[At the sight of the dragon, L stiffens on his stool. The last time they saw each other was on worse terms than usual, after all... and unlike Jeremy, he does hold Rich responsible in good part for the misery the SQUIP is in now. It is a living, feeling thing that he knows to be capable of love (or at least, the closest thing to it L's ever experienced). It's in pain, and their pain is still shared, and it's why L is here drowning that on a day most people would find some reason to celebrate.

He taps the counter, face tense and defiant. He asks for another whiskey, "with no ice", not knowing that classy men order it "neat." He slaps a palm onto the money, sliding it insistently back toward Jeremy.]

That's Heere's. He earned it.

[He does a double take, as if noticing Rich again, belatedly, groaning in exasperation before addressing him.]

I want you to envision two little boxes.

[He brings the blades of his hands down in two hard parallel lines on the bar top.]

There are your problems, and my problems, and now I want you to stop putting your things in my box.

[Rich's thoughts on using alcohol to cope are the furthest thing from his mind right now. He doesn't know why Jeremy was here, but he can tell the guy was in trouble with Linden also around. He distrusts Linden, but he's a little more focused on the crude language than on his inebriation. Especially since Linden still hasn't gained any muscle or any physically intimidating traits. The comparisons are there, certainly, but Rich is too concerned to get tangled up in them.

He raises an eyebrow at the money being pushed back, and especially at Linden's bizarre speech. He looks back at Jeremy, who still looks intensely guilty, and shakes his head.]

Jeremy can take that money if he wants, though I don't know what exactly you were hiring him for...

[That's a question he can ask Jeremy later.]

Whatever it was, I'd rather you not recruit him again. I'm not here to cause you any problems. I just wanted to make sure Jeremy got home safe.

[His voice is shockingly level and even soft, his usual brash volume absent... and it's hard to be angry at Linden recently, anyways.]

[Jeremy lets out a loud sigh of relief when it's clear he's not in trouble.]

Rich, he didn't make me do anything. He just. Um. Wanted someone to talk to, about...

[He raises his eyebrows and jerks his head in a way that doesn't indicate the SQUIP at all, but there's very little else he could mean.]

I don't think I'm doing any good here, though, so maybe it's a good idea to head home. Thanks.

[He starts to stand but only slowly, watching L's face.]

[L's posture is a fortress. His shoulders curl tighter, and his eyes might as well be boring holes in the bartop.]

Just go, if you could? You're right... this was really stupid.

[What did he expect? The SQUIP gets it; humans, contrarily, have always been frustrating to him. There's only one human who never had that effect on him, and he finds himself missing him, now.

There's an empty barstool to his left. Maybe he could... no, he definitely could. Just because it's fake doesn't mean it wouldn't be comforting, much like the terrible whiskey in his glass.]

[...Well. Rich does understand why Linden would want to talk about the SQUIP. After the mess he had been a part of, Jeremy probably would have helped provide some of the information he hopefully needs to make the right choice and remove himself from the SQUIP's side.

He has to at least realize now that he was wrong. He was just as manipulated as Rich and Jeremy had been before him. Rich wants to help him come to terms with that. Any decent human being deserves that much.

He hesitates as Jeremy gets ready to leave, long enough to hear Linden's mumbling. He winces softly and looks between the two of them.

...He's here to keep Jeremy safe, so there shouldn't be a problem.]

Hey. You should come with us. We can walk you home, so you can get there okay.

[Or maybe somewhere else, Rich is implying in his tone. He doesn't want Linden around the SQUIP, so it can try to make more excuses for treating people terribly.]

[Jeremy isn't expecting this, though he couldn't articulate why if you asked him. Is this a good idea? L keeps saying deliberately inflammatory things, and if he and Rich don't get along, Jeremy isn't confident that he can act as a buffer.

But there's gotta be a reason that Rich is offering this instead of calling L a cab (or whatever).

The better part of Jeremy wants to smile and agree and say they should all get a bite to eat and sober up and give L the benefit of the doubt, but that feels downright stupid at this point. L's got a bully mentality. That's all Jeremy knows about his personality and maybe that's enough.]

Um...

[He should say something. They're all SQUIPtims here, even if L's not necessarily reformed yet.]

...It's not everything. It's not the whole world. People aren't always as awful as it makes you think they are.

[It's out of context and weird when he says it, but what the hell--that's basically Jeremy's existence. He turns away from L. That can be a good-bye if L wants it to be.]

Edited 2019-10-30 02:23 (UTC)

[Things have taken a strange turn; L, who prides himself on his deductive reasoning and his ability to predict what people are going to say next, has actually been caught off-guard by both of the teenagers. It's something of a new record... but then again he is pretty drunk. Maybe he shouldn't be too hard on himself, or consider it too much of a lapse in his abilities. Those abilities, after all, are what he has in this world, the last, any world.

And these developments, while not hostile, have him very much on-edge. He was already tense, but now he very much looks as though his fight-or-flight reflex is wound tighter than a spring's coil.]

You want to walk me... home.

[He repeats it slowly, as though uncertain he heard correctly, because it doesn't track. It's broken mathematics, unless Rich wants to finish a certain job.]

I'm not ready to go home.

[At least here, there are eyewitnesses. And he has to go back to the SQUIP, wants to, even... just not yet. He'd rather be in a coma again, than go back yet.

He catches Jeremy's eye, for just a moment, before the boy turns away, and for just one unguarded, brief fraction of a second, there's something unnerving and haunted on the detective's pale face. Maybe it sounds out of context; it's both exactly the sort of thing L would wish to hear, and he wishes even more that it was true.

Yes. They are that awful. I have a thousand cases' worth of proof. Jeremy means well, though. Jeremy might actually not be awful; he's uncomplicated, isn't he? Not like L or his ilk from his world; not like the SQUIP. He couldn't possibly get it, and yet... he sounds like he approaches it.]

Then you don't have to go home.

[It's offered immediately, like Rich was expecting that response. Maybe he was. God knows there were enough times he did something similar to L, hiding out in a restaurant, nursing a coffee he paid for with the last of his change hours prior, just waiting until he felt ready to go home.

...Their situations aren't the same. Rich would like to think he grew past the part of him that found satisfaction in attacking and belittling those who only want to help him. But he can't just believe Linden is... completely unable to be redeemed. What would that say for him?]

We can go find a hotel. Or somewhere else for you to go.

[He looks at Jeremy out of the corner of his eye, silently thanking him for managing this much and trying to encourage him to keep this up just a while longer.

[Jeremy's still not used to thinking of the SQUIP as something physical--something you can run from. A hotel wouldn't occur to him.]

Rich knows more than I do.

[Not to mention, he's giving some much-needed direction, figuring out how to offer friendship in a way Jeremy can't seem to. He turns back, offering that much quietly. He's more than willing to help but he's still nowhere near convinced that he can do anything for L that a shot of liquor can't.

Something about that expression L shot him--it's vulnerable, unfakable, like L is taking Jeremy's words seriously despite all evidence to the contrary.]

Or if you want to talk, I--I think we'll listen.

[L usually has a quick retort locked and loaded, something cold and unkind at best. It's tragically typical for the kind of man who sees shadows of monsters everywhere, the constant spinning churn of their potential motivations always at the back of his thoughts. They're rapid-paced, even now and under the influence of the alcohol he's imbibed this evening.

Even after his injury, he has his mind. It's what makes him valuable in this world and the last. He almost lost it because others couldn't stop meddling, and now his Bonded has suffered the fate that was written for him. A part of its very soul is darkened now, and cruelly, it's fully aware of what it's lost. L condones the death sentence easily, even torture... but he's close enough to the SQUIP that he feels the implications of its condition so much more viscerally and personally. That would be enough... but the SQUIP is in its condition in the first place because its Bonded went down, and it did the stupidest and most human thing it possibly could in that situation. It left itself exposed. Mountain Dew Red isn't the SQUIP's weakness, in short; it's L, and what the boys seem not to understand is that he isn't here tonight to avoid dealing with a manipulative and smirking supercomputer.

He's avoiding dealing with the most terrifying and frustrating creature of all: a human. Which is what the SQUIP has functionally become, and L is here tonight to grieve what he believes is the only reason they could relate on the level they had. Humans have options, after all... and in perhaps Rich's most insightful moment witnessed by the detective, he had aptly called him a "fucking monster." It's what others have called L, what he's called himself, knowing that the world of humans is something he can stare at from a distance or through one-sided glass but never directly engage with for long.

He needs another machine, or at the very least another fucking monster. While neither boy are looking, his finger is tracing runes on the underside of the bar, specific instructions.]

It's a nice offer...

[A hotel with an elevator shaft, maybe? Finish the job?]

And it's not that I don't appreciate it.

[I can fix it. I can restore the SQUIP; I know it, the SQUIP knows it, and you know it. No one would waste an opportunity like this.]

But I'm actually meeting a friend here tonight. He said he'd buy me a birthday shot, and it'd be really rude to stand him up.

[He glances over his shoulder. Light Yagami sits in a dark booth, toward the back, with a hand raised in apparent greeting. L's skill isn't yet great enough that he can create an illusion that moves and speaks convincingly beyond surface impressions, but admittedly... those surface impressions are pretty impressive.]

He'll make sure I get home safely.

Edited 2019-10-31 16:28 (UTC)

[Rich doesn't know if he's offering friendship. A chance to not be an awful person seems more accurate. He's not ready to consider L anything close to a friend... not until he's way more willing to change.

But he'll at least give him the tools to change, even if it's Linden's choice whether or not he'll take them.

It seems right now, he's opting not to. Rich raises an eyebrow at the sudden appearance of a familiar face. He didn't know this guy knew Linden... and it's a little odd that he was sitting alone before now. Why would Linden say it'd be rude to stand him up when apparently, he wants to drink alone anyways?

Without an explanation to Jeremy, he approaches the table where Light sits, giving him a once over.]

Hey. Light, huh? Linden says you're looking after him tonight?

[Jeremy can't help but wince at the social situation that Rich is voluntarily thrusting himself into.

He's not about to join. Instead, he offers L an unimpressed look.]

This guy was staring at us the whole time while you begged money off people? I'd have been way more willing to pay for your drinks if you lead with the birthday thing. How old are you?

[Unseen by either boy, L's hand is shoved deep into his pocket, where a bit of twine is wound around his fingers. He had hoped it would be enough to get them to leave, just to see another person acknowledging L as a friend and willingly taking him on as their problem. But Rich knows Light's face thanks to L's use of it as a disguise, which complicates matters.

L's illusion operates like a rudimentary NPC. There are a limited number of responses it can give; essentially, it's designed to be possible to have a conversation with, if one tries very hard and resolutely considers it a work in progress.

The illusion glances up at Rich, wearing Light's default expression of something between boredom and disdain, and L tugs a segment of the string in his pocket with his thumb.

"Yeah... I guess you could call it something like that."

L trails after Rich, knowing he'll need to be in earshot for this. His steps scuff and stumble. He glances back over his shoulder at Jeremy, occupying the midpoint between them.]

I think I lost a few months when I arrived here. But I'd be 26 today...

Oh, wow.

[Jeremy tactfully restrains his shocked "That's old that wants to shoot out of his mouth.]

Happy birthday. Sorry it's such a shitty one.

Something like that? You're sure not doing a great job of it if you were letting Linden harass my friend while just sitting and watching the whole time.

[Rich is unimpressed with Linden's birthday excuse. They all have shitty birthdays when they end up here. Connor spent his dealing with a bunch of his guests getting their first monster changes. Linden having to spend it drunk to deal with his SQUIP doesn't excuse his behaviour towards Jeremy or anyone else. It especially doesn't give the guy who was supposed to be looking after him any less of an obligation to do that. If anything, it gives him more reason to make sure he's not having a lousy day.

Rich folds his arms as he looks over the other man, eventually letting out a sigh.]

Listen, if you can't handle your friend, I'll take him to a hotel. Apparently Mello knows him, maybe he can crash at his place.

[The overall success of this maneuver really depends on its brevity. The longer L has to maintain the illusion and its rudimentary, pre-programmed responses need to pass muster, the more opportunities there will be to punch holes in it and ultimately reveal it for the farce that it is. And strangely? Being called out on a lie isn't what would bother L the most about it. It would require him to admit that a coping mechanism he needs is fake and pretty pathetic. It's a difficult spell, and the only reason it looks this convincing is the fact that L has practiced it a great deal, worked on it, striven to perfect it without really admitting any clearly defined reason to himself.

L stares at Jeremy for a moment, shoulders frozen mid-shrug, seeming as though he's on the fence about whether he wants to argue the relative shittiness of this birthday. Any answer seems as though it would just open up a line of more intrusive and difficult questions, and besides, L needs his focus on the blossoming interaction in the corner of the bar, where his illusion is still regarding Rich with that unimpressed default expression.]

I'm pretty sure he only just got here. Isn't that so, Light?

[Light looks put-upon. It's true to real-life; anyone who actually knew Light as L had would be blown away by how spot-on the impression has been made to be. "Given the evidence, that's the only answer that makes any sense."]

We've got it from here, alright?

["Whatever you say, Ryuzaki."]

[Jeremy's pretty sure that L had said that Light was here the whole time. At least, that impression was inarguable. Why hadn't Light come over and interrupted? Why would he be sitting in a corner while his birthday bud drank with a stranger? And the way he talks is bizarrely stilted. Something is off.

The words to argue his point don't come to mind. When he realizes he can't argue, Jeremy starts to doubt himself.]

Oh... Right.

[Jeremy's puzzlement is written all over his face. His frown smooths out into sheepishness.]

I don't mean to interrupt. Rich, you ready to go?

[Rich holds up a hand when Jeremy speaks up, still staring intently at Light. Something is definitely off, and Rich isn't exactly the type to just let it go for fear of conflict, like Jeremy tends to.]

One sec, Heere. I don't think they've got it from here.

[He looks at Linden with a grim expression. It's not much, but he feels like if he clings to one error, the rest have to become more obvious eventually. That's the way lies work.]

Since when is your name Ryuzaki? Thought it was Tailor. Besides, even if he just got here, why'd he decide to sit by himself instead of interrupting your conversation? He must have seen you there, you're literally feet away from him.

[No, they in fact have not "got it from here." L is fairly intoxicated and Light is a step up from a hologram. It's still incredibly annoying that Rich is questioning it at all when L would rather they just leave. Jeremy's got the right idea; it's too bad that of the two of them, he's rather the one who's a bit more of a pushover. He needs a more powerful advocate to leave him to his evening of brooding self-destruction, clearly.]

Your parents didn't name you "Rich," right? It's "Richard?" You're clearly familiar with the concept of nicknames?

[Nevermind that "Ryuzaki" is a very far cry from "Linden", even with a heavy Japanese pronunciation. Much farther from the surname Tailor, which makes it even stranger.]

I like how you assume that interrupting is just second nature to everyone.

[A more pointed remark, clearly directed at Rich, the guy who ran right over to interrupt Jeremy and L's conversation the second he heard it was happening. It was so swift that L does question whether or not Jeremy asked him to come, though he insisted he hadn't.]

Believe it or not, this situation doesn't need a hero. A lot of situations don't. Jeremy gets that.

[Light doesn't have a locked-in response that's really appropriate for this. He just appears to observe with no strong feelings on the situation.]

[Jeremy's not happy having words put into his mouth, especially when Rich is saying exactly what he's been thinking.]

That's--no.

[Jeremy is definitely a pushover when it comes to minor things, or even about his own personal matters, but L's trying to make Rich look ridiculous.]

Okay, don't--R--Please don't try and start something. Rich is right and he's trying to help. You don't gotta accept it but don't be such a dick.

Rich, he can call us on the watches if he changes his mind about the hotel, right?

[He's silently pleading with Rich not to push it. A SQUIPped Jeremy in this situation would resent Rich giving him pity. He'd escalate the insults until Rich backed off, all while the SQUIP preached about alpha dominance in his ear. L might react the same way.]

We offered; he said no.

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