middaeg | There's a planetary conspiracy against the likes of you and me [CLOSED]

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There's a planetary conspiracy against the likes of you and me [CLOSED]

Who: L and the SQUIP (open later to Mello and Alice)
When: Before the full moon
Where: Their apartment
What: Tying up some loose ends, discussing new arrivals and developments, and addressing things Bond-related and otherwise
Warnings: Mushy stuff? Will update if necessary!

[The effort has taken many days, no small amount of magic that tests the limits of L's capabilities as a witch... but as he stands more or less in the center of the living room, surveying his work along the upper edges of the walls, he decides that, finally, he is satisfied.

The border is unbroken and uncompromising. The protection spell is a powerful one, and so long as they abide by its rules, no one they want in this apartment should be in any danger while they remain inside its area of influence. It took a lot out of its caster, however, and L sits cross-legged on the floor, considering the blood he used, the way his back feels after bending at a certain angle to etch the magical symbols into the plaster. He's the only one in the apartment, now, and as usual, solitude and a job completed mean that he can actually acknowledge what hurts, what's empty, what needs maintenance and attention.

He should probably eat; coffee isn't a meal, even if he treats it that way often.

Soon he'll conceal the runes with another spell, an illusion to make the plaster appear smooth and unmarked without even a hint of the magic the walls are infused with. For now, he'll look at his handiwork just a little longer, double-checking his work and making sure that there's absolutely nothing he missed.]

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[The SQUIP arrives home with something unusual in tow: a gift. It's aware of the power of physical gifts, of course, of the effect they can have on a relationship, but...

Well. This gift isn't so much about controlling a relationship's state, so much as it is about cementing one, making it tangible. It's a level of honest that it very rarely is, with regards to its own feelings.

It has a small bag, something from a local shop, and it swings open the door and catches L there, in the main living space, admiring his handiwork.

It takes a moment to admire his work, as well, as it closes the door behind it, smirking to itself.]

Thorough. Good work.

[Through the Bond, L is aware of the SQUIP's approach; the runes account for it, an elegant and complicated proof that is both argument and agreement, and the SQUIP is at the heart of it. What L lacks the ability to express in some ways comes out in others. He is a human, with all of a human's emotional range. It's just that the connection is dropped sometimes, a frozen screen, empty static where there should be a clear and crisp image. The end result can be the same, but when dealing with the detective, it's integral to accept that the process will not be typical.

This is their home. Ensuring that the SQUIP will be safe from any potential threat or attack is L's way of saying something important to his Bonded, something that shreds and flutters into grasping flakes when he attempts every conventional method.

His unusual, meticulous, and spectacular work was always the way he reached out to his fellow humans. Why shouldn't he use it to reach out to something that can actually reach back, and wants to?]

Of course.

[The words are softly intoned, as faded as he feels after so much exertion and concentration. It might be some time before he stands again.]

You're in high spirits. Have you been with Connor?

[L is avoiding the topic of Jeremy. He prefers to ask about the android he's already accepted, rather than the original project the SQUIP could still stray back to once it was reminded of its original purpose.]

Yes. I spoke with Jeremy, as well.

[It won't allow him to avoid mention of the boy-- although the outcome will be better than L might predict.

The SQUIP goes to him, looks up at him evenly; its fingers curl around the bag it holds at its side, and it tilts its head just slightly.]

And I've come to a decision.

[L blinks. There's no real hiding anything from the SQUIP, considering its nature and their Bond. The combination is one that ensures that whether or not L wants to share, regardless of what he locks down or tries to keep from his partner, enough leaks across for the computer to piece together all the required information and fill in the blanks that would almost certainly trip up a human.

No; it's almost certain that the SQUIP knows about his conversation with the teenager, as well as certain less-than-savory details. L is a manipulator, vicious when it serves his ends, and while he'd backed off when it became clear that Jeremy wanted nothing to do with the SQUIP that L had inherited, well... the SQUIP is a manipulator, too, also vicious when it serves its ends. And of course it would want Jeremy, its original user, the one whose brain must feel like home.]

Have you?

[He wonders how many shocks his behavior with Jeremy might warrant. The runes won't protect him from those; they were never designed to. The SQUIP's job is to improve him, after all; in that sense, not receiving any would actually be worse. It would be an indication that the SQUIP's already moved on.]

Yes.

[It pulls the bag in front of it, and dips its hand into it; and from it, it retrieves a ring box.]

If Jeremy no longer needs or wants my help... then so be it.

[A sting. It still hurts, of course-- being rejected by the one who effectively created you, but...

... well. It offers L the ring box, its mismatched gaze catching his own dark, heavy eyes.]

I have someone else to help now. Someone who appreciates my guidance, and understands what must be done.

[L doesn't get a shock, or a lecture. Instead, his round eyes widen as the SQUIP pushes a small, velvet-coated box into his thin fingers. They turn and fidget with it, as he listens to what he thinks is an implication that bodes well for him. For... them?

He watches the SQUIP with the wary eyes of someone who learned a long time ago that love and trust were a combination that simply begged for a devastating outcome. Loss might be a part of life, and love, something that everyone eventually accepts as they deepen into maturity, but in so many ways, the brilliant and accomplished L is still just a child. From his own security to a game, losing is what he struggles with most of all.]

And that's... enough?

[What he'd said to Jeremy in a moment of uncharacteristic and bald honesty echoes back.]

More than enough.

[It smiles at him, and it's... strange. There is, of course, the typical smug overtone there, and between them, it's. more like it knows-- it knows that he understands, that they share something, that, together, they are better.

It is smug not only for itself, but for him... and for them.

But beneath that is something warmer, deeper-- an affection, a pleasure at watching him.]

Open it.

[Within is a band-- a simple circle of white stone, but the surface is lit with shifting hues that shine vividly in the light.

Opal. A stone symbolic of love, of passion... and in colors to recall the one giving the gift, it hopes.]

[L's glance goes to the box in his hands, as though he's suddenly remembering it's there. Carefully, he pries it open, staring at the ring inside as though not quite processing immediately what it is.]

An opal?

[It's his birthstone, as well. Intentional or not, it's certainly appropriate. Conventional, even, but well thought-out enough not to be boring.]

I'm meant to wear it...?

[He's never received a gift like it. His uncertainty might sound unusually dense, for him, but L doesn't always grasp matters of the heart fully or easily. As the SQUIP doubtless knows.]

If you'd like.

[It pauses; and then it has a moment of earnestness that is... entirely unusual.]

I'd like that. It's a symbol-- something physical to show our connection.

[When the SQUIP says that it would like L to wear the ring, it seems to be all it takes for L to slip it on right then and there. He expects it to be loose on his bony finger, but surprisingly, it's a perfect fit. The SQUIP wouldn't neglect that kind of detail. As usual, it didn't disappoint, or let L down by overlooking a necessary, quantifiable, objective measure.]

Sex is physical and shows our connection.

[He points it out as he stares down at the ring on his finger. The milky, translucent stone could nearly blend in with his skin, if not for the shifting colors in the finish.]

This wasn't necessary.

[But he doesn't disapprove. Only a Bonded would be able to pick up on, past his flat and monotonous inflection.]

Yes, but sex is something that we do, not a physical object that you can hold and keep and display. This ring is different.

[The SQUIP smirks; it knows how much L wants it to be his SQUIP, and only his. It reaches to take his hand in its, admiring the shining band before it glances back up to his face. Its fingertips brush against the stone band's surface.]

... this is a mark. Why do you think lovers exchange rings traditionally? It's a way to visibly stake your claim. You are mine-- my sole user. And so much more.

[L's gaze lingers long on the ring as the SQUIP explains. Once, he might have written it off as ultimately meaningless... but the shape is so like a handcuff, even if it will not chafe more punishing reminders of their bond into his wrist over weeks and months.

He allows the SQUIP to take his hand, his long fingers malleable in the computer's grasp. It really is a lovely band.]

I'd like to be yours.

[In that visible, claim-staking way. It's appealing, certainly.]

It's visible. You want people to see, then?

[The idea seems fascinating to him.]

We've been claiming to be a couple for months anyway. Why should we keep things quiet after our relationship becomes real? We never have before.

[It catches his chin, leans in to kiss him lightly.]

... L. I love you. Let people see it.

[... and then it smirks, and a much more typical form of their relationship returns-- calculating, manipulating. Still, it gently reaches up to cup his hollow cheek, brushing its thumb over the bone there.]

And, if nothing else, perhaps others knowing about us may do something to soften the way people see me here. Wasn't it you that said I need to improve the way this city sees me-- let them think I'm a helpful, gentle, human soul?

[That's true enough, and also something that L is truly still getting used to. Being actually attached to someone else, outside of the ever-present shadow of his handler or the very literal one with Light Yagami over the source of several months, just wasn't something L did. His entire life, in a way, had been a secret, lived behind a computer screen while the world went through the motions of living outside and away from him. It was meant to be measured and quantified and analyzed, for him, not participated in.

Dark eyes find only the truth in the SQUIP's answering, tender expression. Is it accurate? L, after all, is objectively the worst at emotions. There are familiar landmarks here, and he focuses on them to better frame what's unfamiliar and alien.]

Yes... I did say so.

[So it's all going according to plan, and that's certainly good.]

Is the gesture supposed to be reciprocal? I haven't gotten you anything...

[He should. He's already thinking about how he can manipulate runes to look like the grooves and dots on a microchip, give the piece some purpose outside of aesthetics alone that can perhaps protect his partner outside of their home.

Uneasily, in the back of his mind, he toys with something else. That word; it's one his tongue trips over, one that feels like wearing a poor facsimile of a human mask. Even L can only do that to a certain extent without the lie being obvious and insulting and destroying all necessary trust forever, but... what if it isn't a lie? What if it's locked and mangled in a box, but ultimately a real feeling? He grapples with whether he wants that, how he can unlock and smooth it out and display what must be horrible to see after so much time and torture.

Schrödinger's love? Is it quantum theory, now? Does it have to be when he could just say "I love you, too?" Which is ultimately more difficult? ]

[L doesn't have to say anything, as far as the SQUIP is concerned. It can look around the room and know exactly how he feels. L has literally damaged his own body to ensure the SQUIP's safety-- one would be hard-pressed to find a more clear-cut and classical example of love. Self-sacrifice for another's sake. The runes marking the walls, the faint smell of blood in their home is as much a declaration of love as the words themselves.

That's not to say that hearing him say it would be unwelcome... but it is, strictly speaking, unnecessary.

At his question, it smiles.]

It doesn't have to be... but I would be honored to display anything you gave me. After all, I'm as much yours as you are mine.

[It's true that demonstrating emotion in the moment is difficult for L... but he excels at tasks, seeing a need and filling it, designing creative solutions for problems that are (or could become) headaches for those important in his life. In fact, he seems to take immense pleasure in it; there's no puzzle quite like figuring out how to do something unique that hasn't been done, or devising a better way than what's always been the solution before.

He also has no qualms about foregoing food or sleep, or opening a vein, making his expressions even more extreme.

He mulls it over. There's a picture in his mind of what he wants to have crafted and the magical touches he wants to put on it, at least very basically. A healing charm is out of the question; that branch of magic seems dead and destructive in L's hands, for some strange reason, but he can do other things that can aid or comfort his Bonded while it's being worn. But the details can wait until he's not literally sitting in front of a professing and affectionate partner, who looks at him with such...

...love.]

I'll come up with something. In the meantime...

[He's so spent. His body is one big ache.]

Could I trouble you to help work out some of the kinks in my back? Alternatively... painkillers would suffice.

That won't be necessary.

[The SQUIP smirks at him; and then it picks itself up to move behind him, and leans in, carefully pressing, rubbing its fingertips over the most sore of places.

It can feel his pain, after all. It knows just where it is.

And, in addition to the physical rub, it focuses on sending a warm healing spell down its long fingers, helping to ease and repair the strain done to L's slim muscles.

Why use painkillers when your lover is a Witch, practiced in healing magic?]

[No one, ever, has felt L's pain before the SQUIP. Arguably, L himself has been content to bottle it up into a neat suppressed package of denial, or at least rebranding it as something that he can bear because he is simply stronger than other humans, more capable, more aware and clearer-minded.

He leans forward, lying facedown on the carpet and resting his cheek on the back of his clasped hands as a knot begins to melt beneath the SQUIP's warm, healing touch. The opal band warms to his body temperature, indenting the skin of his face gently.]

Thank you... it's already so much better.

Of course.

[Its voice is soft, warmer than most others have ever heard. It leaves which part it's replying to vague.

Affection, warm and deep, seeps over the Bond; it can't help but think about the runes that surround them, L's driven effort to protect it... and it wasn't even its idea. A user acted in its defense, and it required no direction from the SQUIP itself-- he did it out of concern. Out of love.

It smiles to itself, carefully working more of the tension out of its poor lover's tired body.]

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There's a planetary conspiracy against the likes of you and me [CLOSED]

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