middaeg | [open] not a lot of difference between a foxhole and a grave

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[open] not a lot of difference between a foxhole and a grave

Who: Bucky Barnes & You
When: Throughout July
Where: City streets, a bar, other places as needed.
What: Bucky is still adjusting to this whole magic and monsters thing. His second full moon doesn't go great.
Warnings: A bar fight oops.

[i. Wanna Buy a Knicknack?]
[The jobs on offer right now aren't really suited to what Bucky used to do for a living, back home. You can't exactly put "defended Earth from intergalactic threats from a space station in Earth's orbit" on your resume in a world that seems stuck in a fantasy Victorian era. Still, he's got to find work eventually, because sitting around on his ass isn't sending him and Tony home, and they've got to eat at some point.

Apparently the trading guild is seeking out salesmen - it suits him as well as anything, he figures. Does he still have it in him? It's been a long time since he was fifteen and hawking dirty magazines and cigarettes on the sly to soldiers at Camp Lehigh. Maybe it's like riding a bike. He jots his name down, and they set him up with a stand and an assortment of trinkets - inexpensive jewelry, small toys, keychains - all with minor enchantments, that others couldn't manage to get sold.

It still feels like he has to slip back into a character, play a role, to act like that confident, charming kid he used to be, but it becomes easier the longer he lounges at the street-side table, flagging down potential customers.] C'mon, you want to pick up a little something for your Bonded? A lover? Gag gift for a friend? Drop a few cunes to treat yourself today? I got what you don't even know you need right here.

[ii. Full Moon: The Bar]
[Bucky feels guilty about this. He's living with someone who has been a long time sober, for fuck's sake, and he wants to be sensitive to that, but as the full moon approaches, and that unease he felt the first time around sets in, he decides he needs a drink, or four. He slips out of the apartment mostly unnoticed, bundled into a shabby second-hand coat he bought at a thrift store (snow in July, what the fuck?), and heads to the nearest, seediest bar. It happens to be a fair bit from the Haven, closer to the Harbor district, not a classy or upscale kind of place.

He feels horrible. His skin is crawling this evening, with the moons in the sky shining full above, and he feels restless in a way he can't force down. Aggressive. His canine teeth got sharper last month when this happened, he can still feel them like needles in his mouth. His hair is standing on end for some unknown reason.

He sits at the bar, orders a drink, and tries to drown his discomfort in cheap whiskey. Maybe you catch up to him when he's ordering his third drink, or maybe...

Maybe you get him around drink five, when someone else drunk jostles into his shoulder too hard, and Bucky whirls around to sock him, hard; his thin, sharp canines are bared in a hiss.] You wanna go, buddy? Let's fuckin' go!

[You wanna join in, or drag him out of the fray that kicks up on the barroom floor?]

[iii. Full Moon: Apartment Building, The Haven]
[He's not proud of himself. He's not proud at all. Bucky has no idea what's wrong with him, but he realizes now the whiskey was a mistake. He looks like he got caught in the middle of a bar fight, with a black eye and bloody lip, a tear in his shirt, missing one shoe for some reason, hair all tangled. He also smells like booze - reeks of it, actually, from drinking and from being spilled on in the fray. He's stumbling home, or at least toward the apartment building he and Tony are living in in the Haven, a massively sorry sight.

Someone jostles him on the street - or maybe that was you? - and he curses loudly, dropping into a clumsy crouch and patting along the ground.]

Fuck. Damn it, dropped my keys. Ah, hell...

[iv. Creeping Fire]
[He recognizes it a little faster when he drifts into one of those strange dreams. Like the one before, with the merrow in the lake, singing an infection's siren song, like the cave and the pools. Like the city burning. This one is worse, in a way. He can practically hear the screams in the trees, feel the vibrations of terror in the ground. His skin prickles despite the heat.

It's horrible, what's happening to these strange tree people. There isn't much else to do until he can wake up again, so he gets to work, helping as many uninfected nymphs toward safety as he can, whether it's by fighting or by running, carrying people when he has to.

He's carting a terrified, sobbing child in one arm when it happens. She's hanging on to him tightly, clinging, occasionally obscuring his vision; she doesn't know any better, he can't blame her for that, she's frightened to within an inch of her life. But he skids to a halt, boots kicking up ash and dirt, barely ducking the swinging branch of an infected tree.] Oh come on-! [He could use some help.]

[v. Wildcard]
[Want a specific starter? Hit me up at

nekky!]

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[Bucky scrubs a hand through his hair, trying to sober up in the magically-cool air for a moment longer before he heads inside after Tony.]

Told you what? I didn't plan any of this. [Well, he'd planned to have a drink, not so much to get drunk and get into a bar fight.] I've just been restless. Antsy. I'm tryin' real hard not to pin it all on the fucking lunar cycle, but... It was like this last month too.

[Once they are inside, Tony sighs. He closes the door behind them and gives Bucky a pat on the shoulder. Something he hopes is encouraging.]

I know. You didn't come back and I just thought... I was worried something happened.

[Apparently it did.]

You need to sit down at least. How many people were at the bar?

[Once they get to their apartment, small and generally impersonal as it is, it's still a relief to be away from prying eyes. He sinks down into one of the kitchen chairs, groaning quietly.] Sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I stopped in for a drink to try an' make my insides quit acting like they wanna be outsides, and then some asshole picked a fight.

[Which. Is about how it always seems to go for him. Could he be the one picking the fights??? Nahhh.]

Couple dozen. It was winding down when I left. ["When I got kicked out."]

[Tony gets a glass and fills it with water, bringing it back to Bucky. He's still unhappy with everything, but he's trying to keep a civil expression. He keeps repeating to himself that it's not Bucky's fault, that getting into a fight means he's going through a lot. It makes him feel slightly better.]

Did it work?

[Okay, maybe it doesn't help as much as he wants it to.]

Edited 2019-07-27 18:10 (UTC)

[He doesn't deserve a friend like Tony. It's not fair to him at all. He's always put up with Bucky's bullshit and supported him through the rough patches, and how has Bucky treated him? Like this. He shows up at his door beaten or broken and makes him deal with it when he can't deal with himself.]

...No. [He admits, voice a little rough, expression hangdog and miserable as he takes the glass of water and downs half of it. At least Bucky is pretty good at self-shaming. He's doing it right now.] I made things worse. I'm sorry.

[He still wants to be mad, but the apology dampens his attempt and leaves him feeling bad for being upset. If anyone says Bucky doesn't have super powers, Tony is going to point to those big brown puppy eyes as proof to the contrary.]

You didn't make it worse. This is fixable. Let's get you cleaned up and fed and just- Talk to me. That's what I'm here for, you know.

[They both could use some help for their guilt complexes. It's a little out of control.

He manages a dry little laugh.] Technically you're here because neither of us have managed to figure out a way out of this backwater universe. [He scrubs a hand over his face.] It's probably selfish to say I'm glad it's you, though. [If it couldn't be Steve, at least he's got Tony here with him.]

[Tony gives Bucky a raised eyebrow, pointing an obvious look his way.]

We'll figure it out. We just need to find out how the mirrors work, and we'll do that. We're heroes, remember? This is what we do.

[That is probably being overconfident, but Tony knows Bucky needs the assurance. They both do. So he tries to sound braver than he feels, putting on the Iron Man determination.]

I'm always here for you. Even if I have to learn magic to do that.

[Tony makes a face at that one. It's... not going great.]

Because this is definitely our area of expertise, magic mirrors. [He rolls his eyes, melancholy and not quite sobered up yet.] Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the most fucked up one of all? It's you, Bucky!

[He scrubs a hand over his face, shoulders sagging a little at the honest determination in Tony's voice, the words that are meant to be reassuring. He feels bad all over again.] I know. You know I'm here for you too, right? I'm- I ain't the best at it, but I'm here. I'm gonna get better at it.

You're not.

[Tony reassures him with confidence in that much at least. Maybe he's not sure about magic or being pulled through mirrors, but he believes in his friend. He can give him that much without any doubt. He takes a seat across from Bucky at the table, tired and still a little queasy, but feeling better now that they are talking.]

I know you're going through a lot. That doesn't mean you're- You're fine. And I trust you.

[At times, maybe Tony does just want to look after Bucky and take care of him. Part of that is because he's always felt like the older Avenger, even if that technically isn't true. Part of it is just because he sees how much Bucky is struggling and wants to help.]

You're the one keeping me grounded here, you know. I'm pretty sure I'd go crazy without you.

[Which isn't entirely a lie. He doesn't have the memories he needs to be grounded, although he is probably working things out okay. He still wants Bucky to know that Tony trusts him.]

We both are. I shouldn't be such an asshole. It's not just me. [Tony might not be changing physically, but he's got a whole new set of powers that he has to learn to control. That's a lot, too. Tony sits across from him and Bucky leans against the edge of the table, an arm stretched out on top of the wood.

He barks out a little laugh at that.] I'm the one- No, I'd be going crazy without you around too. This whole thing, magic and monsters and bullshit disease, it's too much even for people like us. Christ.

[He falls quiet for a minute or two, breathing, trying to center his thoughts.] I trust you too. You know that. [It seems like the kind of thing he should say out loud, should give him that certainty that Bucky, who trusts so few, trusts him and they're in this together.]

[They're both changing. That is what Bucky is telling him. But there is a clear difference in the way they are changing and Tony can't overlook that. He tries to ignore it, sometimes even ignore the possibility of it, but it's hardly a wonder that Bucky is trying to drown out the situation. Tony can only be so mad about that. He's done far worse. Sometimes he just has to remind himself that not everyone is as bad as he is about their vices.]

Hey, we're working on this together. It doesn't matter what we have to face. We can face it. I just... don't want to lose you. This place is too strange to deal with on our own.

[If nothing else, at least this will serve as a lesson for him. Bucky doesn't always repeat the same mistakes day in and day out - occasionally he learns. He'll handle it better, next time. He'll figure some way around all the pent up aggression and the itchy feeling under his skin.]

Ain't gonna lose me. I'm not going anywhere until you do. [And the only place they'll be going is back home, through those mirrors, eventually. One of these days. He puts on a confident little smile he doesn't quite feel.] You and me, we're in this to win this, right?

Well, I'm not going anywhere, so I guess that means we're both stuck.

[Tony says that, but it actually doesn't sound so bad when he has Bucky with him. For once he's on a mad adventure and doesn't feel quite so alone. He's not sure how long it's been since he's had a partner to count on. Maybe too long, if his faulty memory is anything to go by.]

We're going to win. I'm not sure what we're winning exactly, except maybe an ice pack for you, but we'll win it.

[At least he's relaxed enough to give Bucky a hard time.]

Next time you want to get into a fight, just call me.

Things could be worse. I could still be stuck on a ship with Moon Knight and Gamora. [That whole ordeal was a mess and he's glad to be past it. Not so glad to be the new Man on the Wall, but at least that station full of weaponry didn't wind up Gamora's or the Punisher's.]

I'd happily win an ice pack at this point. C'mon, Glinda, magic me up one? [He's teasing now, trying to bring a little light to the conversation as well.]

I think next time I'm lookin' for a fight, I should try to find a gym instead.

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[open] not a lot of difference between a foxhole and a grave

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