middaeg | [ closed ] The vacancy that sat in my heart

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kh: sora

[ closed ] The vacancy that sat in my heart

Who: Vanitas + Sora
When: First of Jan
Where: Coven
What: 1 Year of Bonding
Warnings: TBA

[ During the whole not!Christmas season, Vanitas had asked Sora a very serious and important question. Actually the entire meal had been something of a prelude to just ask Sora the very question about renewing their vows for their Bond. Initially, their Bond had been something that had been rather rushed. Rushed and somewhat forced on Vanitas' end, considering he would have died without it and perhaps that very night. The only reason he had agreed had been because of Sora and Mira's insistence.

Now that it has been a full year? So many things have changed. Vanitas has changed and continues to do so because of the influence that his Bonds have had over his heart. They've started to fill in the fissures and holes that still remain in his soul. His Bonds complete him and Sora had been the first. Even the very nature of their Bond has changed since that time. They are different now. Thus Vanitas has wanted to do this again, this time correctly and with the words that reflects this relationship now.

That's what today is all about. Sora and Vanitas going and doing this. Of course they aren't stripping themselves of their Bond to do it all over. The words won't have any real power save unto themselves. But in the end that's all that really matters isn't it? It's just for themselves.

But first! Before all of that, Vanitas has something for Sora. Of course. That Puca sure does love to sleep and there's really only one thing that rouses him:

Food.

That's why Vanitas is showing up with a tray and a meal of strawberry pancakes. ]

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[Sora's arrival in this world marks a pretty significant moment in Sora's heart. His first bond with Vanitas had been rather problematic back then. Sora had thrown himself into it to save Vanitas' life but at the time he had no idea what it all really entailed. Without any sort of monster enhancements, Sora had taken in Vanitas' overabundance of magic like getting hit with a truck. He vaguely remembers how it burned his skin, how his lungs hurt and how he had almost thrown up.

It's not really a particularly pretty memory.

But things are so much different now. A year and more for Vanitas in this world have changed so much. What Sora would say about their bond is so different from what it would've been a year or more ago.

The smell of pancakes triggers a small wiggle of Sora's nose. He twitches and slowly shifts in the sheets. He pulls the fabric and blinks slowly.]

Whas...that?

[ Back then even Vanitas had planned on annulling the Bond eventually. Or, rather, he thought that once Sora really got to know him - feel him - that the Puca would break it of his own accord. Yet that never happened. Hasn't happened. Thus it has had a rather profound impact on Vanitas. ]

What do you think it is? It's the only thing that will get your lazy butt out of bed.

[ Specifically, breakfast. ]

[But look at him now! Not only very committed to this bond but to the boy too. So much that even with breakfast being offered to him... Sora reaches out to grab at Vanitas to pull him right back into bed with him.]

That's not the only thing...!

[Better put that plate down somewhere safe and quick.]

Sora!

[ Yeah, no worries there. Van casts a quick floating spell and the plate will continue to hover above them as Sora drags him down.

There's so many ways to interpret Sora's words. Right now he's going to assume it's morning hugs and. Augh. Cuddles. So Vanitas will wiggle and squirm until he's comfortable. ]

It's the only for sure method!

Hahaha!

[Sora is chuckling madly as he pulls Vanitas right into his blanket trap. A mound of blankets and pillows. Sora is content to cuddle right into his bondmate and keep him there for just a while longer.]

I'll get to breakfast in a second!

[He's busy right now with ruffling his nose against Vanitas' collarbone.]

[ Sora just keeps making these blanket nests and tearing up the bed. Luckily Vanitas is used to this and works around it as best as possible. However Sora still manages to get him into these mounds of blankets. Like right now! ]

You're insufferable, you know that?

[ But fine! He supposes that they can actually just lie there a couple of minutes. It's hard to resist the pull of warmth and the closeness of their Bond tugging on his senses. Then there's the added nosing against his collarbone.

Vanitas gives a long sigh of suffering and then begins to scratch at those soft ears. ]

You get two minutes. Your food will get cold otherwise.

[ Not that Van couldn't use magic to warm it up, mind. ]

[He just can't help making these blanket nests on occasion, there's just something so comforting about being nestled up in a pile of blankets that smell like him and Vanitas. He's not sure what sort of monster instinct it's giving into but he can't deny it most of the time.

Besides, Vanitas makes him laugh and gives Sora his way despite being huffy. That's how Sora sees it.]

Uh-huh! Guess you've gotta suffer through two minutes, then!

[And he'll enjoy every second of it. Including giving Vanitas a small nip and bite to the neck.]

We're renewing our bond vows today, aren't we?

[ Vanitas has no idea whatsoever. He has thought about picking up a guidebook on rabbits to figure out what is causing this. Van doesn't really mind. How can he will how stupidly adorable Sora is? How can he when he is literally the center of this dumb Puca's world and giving him exclusive attention? ]

I am suffering. Can you not feel how much I hate this?

[ His breath catches at the nip though. Sensitive as ever. Van tweaks Sora's ear in retaliation. ]

Yeah, we are. New year. New vows.

[Sora laughs out in return at each comment and ear tweak. He knows better- He knows Vanitas likes every second of this. So that's why he keeps being insufferable with a few playful kisses to Vanitas' throat. It's okay. He's only teasing right now.]

Okay- [Sora is snickering.] That's something that'll get me out of bed too. Not just pancakes.

[But he still wants those pancakes.]

But you still want those pancakes.

[ Vanitas teasingly coos in return. So if Sora is going to continue to kiss and nuzzle his neck? Making Vanitas shiver and want other things? Well then he will seek more revenge as well.

This time by reaching down and starting to play with Sora's fluffy little tail. ]

You're so high maintenance with your cuddle sessions.

It's- [A gasp! His hips squirm.] It's bad to waste food!

[He lets out a small rabbit-like chitter and noses Vanitas' skin.]

I have a feeling if I stopped our cuddle sessions you'd be the one more upset than me. Admit it!

I admit to nothing.

[ One slight shift and Vanitas is biting at one of Sora's ears as well. It's really more teasing than enticing. ]

Should we make it a contest to see who can hold out the longest?

[Sora gasps happily at the teasing bite.]

You couldn't leave my tail and ears alone if your life depended on it.

[ Vanitas makes a face... ]

And you think you could stop holding my hand or nuzzling my cheek for even an hour if we're in the same room?

[ Uh oh. ]

[Gosh, is this them realizing they're always in the honeymoon phase-]

I could handle it! Come on!

[Sora fusses and does exactly the opposite by nuzzling Vanitas once again. Then he finally sits up to reach for the floating plate.]

But today's our bonding vows day, so today can't count for a challenge like that.

[ Hey now. They've had their disagreements. Some of them they haven't really been able to reconcile with one another either. So those issues are bound to come up again and rear their ugly heads from time to time. ]

Pfft. I don't think you can.

[ Van sits up as soon as Sora does, stretching. He's already eaten, but he can wait for Sora to clean up his plate. ]

There's no need to start that today, no. I can agree.

That's right!

[Sora gives Vanitas a smile and then digs into his delicious breakfast made just for him.]

Are we going to the bonding hall on the coven grounds today or are we going to go somewhere else?

We're going to the Bonding Hall. Why would we go anywhere else?

[ Unless... ]

I mean if we were going to go to a place significant to us it would be a rooftop. Do you really want to speak our vows on a rooftop?

[Sora has a bite of strawberry pancakes in his cheek.]

Shout our vows from the rooftops?

[Does Vanitas even need an answer to that?]

I mean...

[Sora would do it.]

Just kidding, the hall is great.

[ Is Sora a rabbit or a squirrel? Sometimes Vanitas isn’t sure with the way that the other packs away food in his cheeks sometimes. There’s a mean thought to push and poke at them. Van chases it away. ]

Please. I know you would shout it. That’s not even in question.

[ Instead he will just tug on an ear. ]

How soon will you be dressed and ready to go?

[Sora chitters playfully and tilts his head with the tug to his ear. He quickly scoops up more pancake and eats it down quickly. Look how fast he can go!]

Just give me a bit! I'll be quick!

[Because he's ready and excited to go as well. Today is a big day for them and he wants to see how it goes. So with a quick cleaning of his plate Sora then gets up to go get ready for their day-- Which he wonders should he put on something nice? Maybe? Well, some newer and clean clothing get put on.]

While you do that I'm going to take this down stairs.

[ He snatches up the plate from Sora and starts to meander back to the kitchen. Vanitas is a neat and tidy person. Naturally he is going to want to make sure the plate is clean.

As for his attire? Well he's simple. It's just blank pants with a black turtleneck. So Sora can be fancy if he wants. ]

[He won't get too fancy but he does put on a nice white button-up shirt. Because why not?? He thinks he looks okay but he's not sure. Dark jeans! Good enough!

But with that, he washes up and dresses and ruffles a hand through his tousled brown hair and then goes to meet up with Vanitas downstairs.]

Ready! Let's get this show on the road!

[ At least it isn't a shirt and just straight up shorts. Vanitas had been surprised that Sora could actually dress in weather appropriate attire from time to time.

He's just finishing up trying the plate and putting extra pancakes up for later when Sora makes an appearance. ]

You have everything you want to say ready?

[ Now Van heads to the door, grabbing a coat and his new scarf. ]

[Never fear even if Sora is wearing the odd pair of pants he's rolled up the cuffs to at least mid-calf. His boots will do the rest. Plus Arendelle was enough of running around in cold weather without proper clothing anyway!]

Uh-huh. It's all right here. [He taps his forhead.] And here. [And then he taps his heart.

Seems Sora doesn't need to memorize anything. He's ready to go. And grabbing his own winter jacket and scarf.]

[ Sora tapping his heart... Vanitas rolls his eyes and takes a hold of Sora's cheeks. Going to give his Bondmate and boyfriend a smooch right on the forehead. ]

So let me steal it from you.

[ Maybe it will help Van quiet his stirring thoughts. He's actually more nervous about this than he is letting on. It's... It's really the first time that he's going to put into words some of the things that he feels. ]

Edited 2021-01-15 02:54 (UTC)

[Sora chuckles softly and shuts his eyes when he receives his kiss to the forehead.]

You already did that ages ago.

[His hands tug gently on the front of Vanitas' jacket.]

[ Van chuckles, taking the scarf and wrapping it around Sora more securely and tying it off. ]

I'm... Glad we're doing this today.

[ With that said, he pushes the door open and takes Sora's hand. Ready! ]

[Sora laces their hands together and outside into the wintery cold they go together. But Vanitas is warm to walk with so Sora won't complain. Too much.]

I'm glad too. I'm really excited!

[He grins at Vanitas and it's off towards the coven halls. It's a blustery day but the coven halls are as busy as ever with classes and research. Something about missing people and odd magic is whispered in the distance but Sora doesn't quite catch the news yet.

When they reach the bonding halls Sora looks up at the familiar big doors. The last time he was here it was with Kor Meteor. And before that? Riku and Kairi... They'll be escorted to the main bonding ceremony rooms but they might have to explain they just want to use the space and not actually perform a bonding. Already bonded here!]

[ It is a brisk sort of walk. Vanitas isn't particularly fond of the cold. So cold in these months! Yet Sora has his hand and is walking alongside him. They make quite the pair and, honestly? Van has always been a little surprised that so few people comment on their likeness anymore.

He's just as nervous as he is excited. Words are not his strongest asset when it comes to expressing how he feels. Then again that kind of honest comes from the heart and that's something that's still currently in development. That's why he's not really paying attention to the hustle and bustle in the halls or listening in on conversations. ]

Hnn. You think they'll let us borrow it?

Yeah, I'm sure it'll be fine.

[Sora is the one who talks to the attendants about this too. Once he explains their reasons they look at Sora and to Vanitas with little knowing smiles. Sora looks at Vanitas and smiles softly before they're lead to one of the bonding ceremony areas where they're allowed to use the space as they fit.]

See? I think they were pretty happy to hear our idea.

[Some people just like sappy stories.]

So, if I remember this right we sit opposite each other right here!

[ Van hums and allows for Sora to speak. The Puca is much better at it than Vanitas is. It's not that he's using his Bondmate as a shield, but he kind of is. Though it definitely looks like the attendants seem to understand.

Maybe they aren't the first ones to think of this idea. ]

Yeah... But they are giving us the "aww isn't that cute" look too.

[ He hates it when people look at him - at them - like that. Vanitas is a little embarrassed after all. But eventually they get to the room and this time Van can sit down of his own accord. ]

Pfft. Going to follow your lead on that. I don't remember much.

[Sora only lets out a small laugh at Vanitas' distaste. He doesn't really mind so much when people look at them. It was like back during the winter holiday when everyone was trying to coax them to kiss under the mistletoe. People just think they're sweet and there's nothing wrong with that! Save for Vanitas' embarrassment getting flared up.

Once they sit down there is a certain magic in the room that makes Sora sniff the air. Then he holds out his hands for Vanitas to take both of his with a knowing grin on his face.]

Yeah, you were pretty out of it before. We gotta hold hands, though. Before, there was some magic that bound them together like a rope or a ribbon.

[That won't happen this time though! Probably.]

I don't think we'll be doing a ribbon this time around.

[ Because they don't really need the entire Bonding Ceremony. They're really just here to repeat some words at each other. Important words, but there won't really be any magic. Just maybe some strong feels coming across their bond.

Vanitas reaches out to take Sora's hands in kind. ]

So... Should you go first or?

[Sora seems to let out another laugh. Softer this time. And maybe just a little pleasantly nervous too. This is a lot more serious this time especially with Vanitas awake and lucid for it all. And with so many more feelings tired to it all Sora's heart feels like it's already racing a little.]

Uhh...! [His ears are twitching with some giddiness.] I went first last time, I don't mind if I go first again? Unless you wanna lead the charge this time!

[Basically Sora has no preference!]

[ Van's ears burn and he ducks his head. Look, this part is just really hard for him. ]

No, I can. I just... Need a minute?

[ To gather his thoughts, really. Putting things into words - real words and not ones meant to illicit a negative reaction that he controls - is difficult. Sora shouldn't have to go first all of the time just for Van's sake. ]

[He really wouldn't have minded it, especially when he sees that facial reaction. He feels for Vanitas' struggle. So he gently squeezes Vanitas' hands gently.]

Okay. Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere.

[Take as many minutes as needed.]

[ It does take a few moments. Sora squeezing his hands and taking a few calming breaths really helps. ]

I recall that I said that I would make you stop and think about yourself sometimes instead of just rushing headfirst into something for someone else... Thinking about yourself first.

[ That had been the original promise. ]

That part I don't intend to change. You are definitely the most reckless person I know and it's not out of self-preservation that makes me determined to keep with it. You are one of the few positive things in my life. You filled in holes in myself that I didn't even know existed. So now I want to make sure you're not doing anything too selfless or reckless because I don't want anything to happen to you.

[ Vanitas huffs, ears still burning. Does Sora really understand just how important he really is to Van now? ]

I might have been able to figure out what happiness is eventually, but you sped that process along. As for things like love and affection? Being wanted? That's pretty much all on you. I'm still me even with these things and you've never asked me to change who I am.

[ He gives Sora's hands a squeeze. ]

So... Let me keep you. Let me figure out how to love you. Let me make sure that you get what you want and what you deserve because you keep doing all that crap for other people but never ask for it in return. I want to continue to be the person that completes you.

[It almost starts off like Vanitas is scolding him for being a reckless idiot at first which, fairly, is on point and Sora ducks his chin down to let out a short snicker under his breath. It isn't the first time that someone's called him reckless and too selfless. And it won't be the last time either. But as Vanitas continues Sora's gaze snaps back up to Vanitas' face and he listens and watches with something deep in his heart aching with several different emotions all at once.

His hand squeezes back and Sora feels the prickle of happy tears in his eyes and he can't help as they trickle out and down his cheeks. He sniffles quickly and tries to stop them but it's a bit fruitless.]

Not- Not crying because I'm sad or anything!

[Sora blurts out quickly. He knows sometimes he has to make that distinction for Vanitas.]

Just... Really really happy! Geeze!

[Sniffles!! ...

Taking care of each other, finding that safety net in each other- it's never something he thought he'd have with Vanitas but this entire world has flipped his heart right upside down and he's happy. And all he's ever wanted was to help Vanitas find his own heart and who he wants to be. So now?

Let me figure out how to love you...

A nod and Sora's smile comes quickly, warm and as bright as ever. But he is going to need just a second before he starts his own vows.]

[ Van can feel all those emotions swirling around in Sora's heart across their Bond. It worries him at first and the Witch is about to fret and say something. Then the tears come and Van's anxiety actually spikes a little. Had he said too much? Not enough? Or had he said something the wrong way and now there's some kind of misunderstanding?

Before he can say something back, Sora seems to read Van instead. He speaks about those being happy tears and well. Van can live with that. So he settles. Settles and waits for Sora to begin. If the other needs to collect himself, that's fine.

Vanitas can wait. That smile is enough right now. ]

[Sora inhales one more long happy sniffle. He is just a little bit overjoyed to hear Vanita say so many sweet and heartfelt things like that. In this room that is all about their bond that they have forged together. It just makes him so happy. He never thought he could be this happy.

He finally looks back up at Vanitas and rubs his thumbs over the backs of Vanitas' hands.]

Okay.

[He sighs softly, ears drooping just a little as he feels his heart beat.]

When I first met you I didn't really know what to think of you. It was like you were from this entirely other place that I'd never understand. But even then I knew there was something different about you that I was really drawn to. It took me a while but I think it was here that I really noticed what that thing was.

[Sora's side of the bond flourishes with something sweet and gentle. Feelings bubbling inside him like a washing tide.]

I really was missing parts of my heart. I lost parts of it along the way. I know I give too much, but it's just how I am. But it was you that helped all those holes feel full again, bit by bit. Peice by piece. And all I've ever wanted was for your heart to heal and grow too. I feel like all those things just fell into place like they were always supposed to.

[He tilts his head.]

We're so far away from home but I still feel at home when I'm with you. And I think that's what I was drawn to all along. How much you really do complete me too.

My vow to you is always going to be to stay right by your side. To keep seeing your heart grow into the shape of you and everything that comes with it, for bad or for worse. Because I love you more than anything. All the scars and bumps, the way you tease me and call me names, the way you hold me when I'm feeling lonely, the stubborn way you do things... All of it. I want to protect you just as much as you protect me, give you want you need and take what I need too. Because that's what we are now. You and me.

[ Van's waits patiently for Sora to collect himself. He doesn't think that the other is going to have issues expressing himself through words once he gets going. Sora is much better than Van at wearing his emotions on his sleeve. At being unafraid of speaking from the heart. He suspects that he is going to get some sappy lines from the Puca and boy...

Sora doesn't disappoint at all, does he? It's all incredibly sappy. Emotional. Soft. ]

Sora...

[ Yet he feels a little painful clench around his heart all the same. A longing that, even though it isn't needed at this point, makes him want to reach out across this space and touch the stupid Puca. Van hates weakness. Detests it in himself and mocks it in others. He should be recoiling in it now, but all he can do is really embrace it. Sora has given him more than anyone else has. Has wanted him for all that he is and even now, even after their arguments and disagreements about what should be done in situations... Sora hasn't backed down. Hasn't pulled away. Hasn't made any demands of Vanitas whatsoever.

It makes all the difference. It means the world to Vanitas. It is everything. Here Sora proudly proclaims that he still wants to remain by Van's side. And now his heart is feeling too full. Full of a warm, painful emotion and a need to be physically near his Bondmate. His other half. Van wants to be the only one that Sora needs for these things. Desires for Sora to not look at anyone else to fulfill this role.

His head ducks down. Eyes burn. There's something bubbling in his chest with an emotion that he's still just a little too afraid to name. But it's there. It's there with such an intensity that it's starting to leak from Van's eyes in the form of tears. And he doesn't know what to do with himself in this moment. His throat is too tight now to speak. ]

[Sora's expression softens as he feels that flourish of intense emotions washing between them. They are both such emotional boys. Sora's own heart is aching with all of this. They didn't need any sort of magic to bond between them because he can feel all of this so deeply already.

He knows how much it aches. To care about someone else this much. It's like it hurts. Like it feels like weakness. But Sora would say it only makes you stronger.

He leans forward, coaxing Vanitas to look up at him with a small nudge of his nose like a rabbit would. Then he kisses Vanitas very softly on the lips. Sealing the vows between them with something so simple and gentle and soft.]

[ Sora would say something silly like it makes you stronger rather than weaker. Vanitas would still debate this but that's not the point.

The Puca's too busy nudging Vantias and it draws him out of his thoughts. At least they are on the same page with this. Because as Sora kisses him softly, Vanitas eagerly kisses the other back.

Who needs magic to seal their vows when they have this? ]

[They don't need magic at all. The flutter of their own emotions flickering over their own bond is already there. Bright, warm and star-like as usual. When Sora pulls back from the kiss there's a soft happy smile on his lips and he gives Vanitas a playfully gentle wink too.]

There, I think that should do it.

[While basking in the gentle flow of their bond. Vanitas. He loves him so much.]

[ They don't QUITE need magic. The point is that the magic already exists. Has been there between them for almost a full year now. Their connection is strong. Part of it is because of how they feel, but also the other part is that Sora doesn't allow for Vanitas to shut down either. He doesn't permit Vanitas to block their bond our any emotion he's particularly feeling - even when Van feels a touch overwhelmed.

There's no smile on Van's lips as Sora pulls back. Not a real one. There's a bit of an upturn at the corn of his mouth but does that count? ]

Finally said all that you feel the need to say, Cottontail?

[ Basking in that gentle flow and that teasing, of course. He might kind of love him too. ]

I think so. [He grins.] I could probably say even more but we'd be here all day and you'd get annoyed.

[He's just joking! He thinks the bond vows are wonderful. Tied together with a neat finish by the flourish of softness and truth across their bond.]

I feel like we need to go celebrate. How about we get some cake?

You couldn't possibly have enough to say to last the entire day.

[ With that last bit of soft affection, Van stands. He keeps a hold of Sora's hands, only dropping one of them so that they can walk out. Together. ]

Cake sounds acceptable.

[ Probably with some hot chocolate. And Vanitas? Well he has an idea of where they should go now. That's how they'll end the day. With sweets that they both enjoy. Those soft, warm feelings? They'll continue to float between their bond. Maybe magic hasn't been done here today, but Van sure can feel the strength of the Bond between them as if he had been renewed.

That's a feeling he'll just hold onto. ]

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[ closed ] The vacancy that sat in my heart

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