the ragged way crowley breathes, the race of his pulse, the pounding of his heart, and the unsteadiness of his hands. it feels nightmarishly human, delicate and vulnerable in ways that just feel wrong to him and—
he had caused it. he had caused it and crowley had the audacity to ask him how he was doing. he feels bewildered and overwhelmed and he thinks he might forget how he's supposed to breathe. how could it matter how he felt? he did feel better, which was an uncomfortable realisation, but that should hardly be the concern. crowley shouldn't be asking, neither should he still be trying to hold him close. )
Out! The other room! A-anywhere!
( somewhere he didn't run the risk of being bitten again. aziraphale couldn't say that he wouldn't bite again. he hadn't even thought he would do it the first time, so how could he predict the second? or more?
his hand falls away to rest against crowley's collarbone, letting aziraphale press his face against him unhindered. )
Anywhere but here.
( said quietly, misery clear in his tone.
he just needed some time to collect himself so he could tend to crowley's wound. he had been right when he said he needed someone to care for it and there wasn't anyone other than aziraphale here. unless he were to call someone?
but he feels an immediate revulsion to the idea. he doesn't want anyone else here. what was wrong with him? he couldn't keep thinking that way.
he lets out a frustrated sigh, muffled against crowley's neck. )
no subject
the ragged way crowley breathes, the race of his pulse, the pounding of his heart, and the unsteadiness of his hands. it feels nightmarishly human, delicate and vulnerable in ways that just feel wrong to him and—
he had caused it. he had caused it and crowley had the audacity to ask him how he was doing. he feels bewildered and overwhelmed and he thinks he might forget how he's supposed to breathe. how could it matter how he felt? he did feel better, which was an uncomfortable realisation, but that should hardly be the concern. crowley shouldn't be asking, neither should he still be trying to hold him close. )
Out! The other room! A-anywhere!
( somewhere he didn't run the risk of being bitten again. aziraphale couldn't say that he wouldn't bite again. he hadn't even thought he would do it the first time, so how could he predict the second? or more?
his hand falls away to rest against crowley's collarbone, letting aziraphale press his face against him unhindered. )
Anywhere but here.
( said quietly, misery clear in his tone.
he just needed some time to collect himself so he could tend to crowley's wound. he had been right when he said he needed someone to care for it and there wasn't anyone other than aziraphale here. unless he were to call someone?
but he feels an immediate revulsion to the idea. he doesn't want anyone else here. what was wrong with him? he couldn't keep thinking that way.
he lets out a frustrated sigh, muffled against crowley's neck. )
I'm sorry.