[open] give me the dough bro

[omnicrafter]

Who: Irhya and OPEN
When: All July/Juril
Where: Throughout!
What: Quests and general catch-all for threads!
Warnings: None? Yet, that I know of.


1) Avant-Garde

[Irhya is not new to designing and coordinating outfits. Alas, her weakness to sunlight just means she can't really model them herself, at least during prime hours. Instead, she decides to help the tailors and designers figure out how Mirrorbound fashions work, and perhaps learn a thing or two in the process. (Elastic, as it turns out, is a fantastic thing.)

You may have come in to get something commissioned or fixed up, or you may have been pulled in off the street for "looking like" a Mirrorbound. Or maybe you're even helping the tailors yourself. Nonetheless, you are immediately bombarded with a very earnest question, one that demands an answer.]

Quick. What's your favorite color combination? Don't stop to think about it.

2) Pat-a-Cake

[Look. Normally, she's fine with dishing out compliments where necessary, but she can't take them for shite, and forcing them is just awkward as all hell. Trouble is, she needs this bread to shove down a certain gloomy arsehole's throat if she can manage it, or so the plan goes. So she turns to the nearest person rolling the dough, hesitates for a moment, and then looks at the floor.]

Your hands look nice, powdered in flour like that...

[...What?]

Does that count?

3) The Feline Collection (closed to housemates and people who have reason to be at their house)

[At Mira's pressing, Irhya has gone out and brought home a cat of her own like it's no big deal. Not a disappearing one, mind, nor one with wings like Breezy, just a regular cat with no special powers to speak of. If anything, that might be the dangerous part, she thinks; between all the creatures here with some unique powers of their own, perhaps it's for the better she took this one in.

But the cat is unique, though, in that she's a female ginger, she thinks while laying with her back flat on the couch. A good way to contrast with Breezy, right? The trouble is... now she needs a name, and that could take a while. If someone comes through the door, though, she's quick to grab their attention from the living room:]

Oi, whichever of you just walked in! Come help me name the cat.

4) Doppelkatze (spoilers for the FFXIV dark knight quest chain, particularly lv50+)

If you had the opportunity to say something to someone you normally cannot, right this second, what would it be?

[What an odd question for anyone to ask, much less someone with that look on their face. It's... oddly speculative. If you know her and have run into her around town today, you'll know it's not unusual for her to play coy like this just for kicks, but... something doesn't seem quite right. It's like she's seeing you through a different lens than usual, especially if she's met you before.]

No need to explain yourself. Just answer with what your heart tells you.

[The encouragement is bizarrely gentle, like there's no judgment involved if you want to scream or cry or spit venom as an answer. It's important; she's evaluating something...]

Comments

[omnicrafter]

I don't, either, but I'm grateful for the perspective. I've always thought of it as a problem of, "who could love someone that can't love herself?" And the answer is no one, of course, but that knowledge alone never really spurred me to any epiphanies... If anything, it's the reason why Fray exists in the first place, outside of a few chance factors.

[She doesn't even really know why she's suddenly spilling this out to him. It's vulnerability, and moreover, it's dangerous when she knows he could easily make a poisonous comment at her with just the wrong humor, and that it would hurt more than usual. And moreover, what should he care, anyway?

But it's that thinking that got her so deep in the hole in the first place. She considers sticking to just talking about Mettaton, then swallows; it would seem odd to suddenly re-rail the conversation back to him.

So, she inhales, hand still on his back as if she's still the one comforting him. If he does make a jab at her, oh well. Maybe she deserves it for approaching the subject recklessly.]

I just didn't think to check that there were already people around me that did, and that I was just pushing them to a more comfortable distance to fit that view. It is... not easy to root out.

[unsundered]

Hmm....

[It would be easy to make a jab at her. To use this show of vulnerability against her, and it's not as though Emet-Selch didn't have the impulse. It wasn't as though he'd forgiven her or likely ever would- so why should he care about the insecurities of someone like this?

(And even if he didn't use it now, some yet-resentful corner of his mind knows that it's a vulnerability that could be utilized at another time, when he's in a more spiteful mood.)

But while accepting a coexistence in this world with these heroes didn't require knowing them, or being involved with them, it was harder yet to divorce his interest entirely, to be indifferent as he should be. So he thinks about it instead.

It's a problem he doesn't entirely understand himself; the Ascian had a plethora of self-confidence, and his issues (of which there are a few, maybe, he could grudgingly recognize that sort of) lied elsewhere.]

Is it actually comfortable in the end, or merely convenient? The familiarity of distance.

[Okay, that part he could understand more, and he pauses.]

Still. From avoiding it, ignoring it to the point of developing a second self to cope... to being aware of it on one's own... 'tis an improvement, is it not?

[omnicrafter]

No... you're right. Comfortable is the wrong word. It simply fits the story I tell myself so often. I've always been aware of it... but I want to improve upon it further now. To a point where maybe I don't have to second-guess myself into self-destruction. Maybe if I do, it won't sound as fake in my head...

[Somehow, talking to someone she knows won't coddle her or give her the wrong kind of positive attention is more cathartic than the alternative. Even so, her gestures remain affectionate, like she doesn't so much seek the attention as feel he needs it in turn regardless of her own state; her arm looped over his back drops to his side to thread across his elbow.]

I appreciate you listening and offering input, though. Thank you. It may not be a problem you've ever faced, but you don't mince words when faced with problems like these, and I respect that greatly.

[unsundered]

Oh, so you're starting to see the value in the wisdom we Ascians carry? [Not quite as idle or casual a tone as he usually makes it, but it's a valiant attempt.] Well, should you ever care to hear further uncomfortable or unwanted truths... what else am I here for?

[There may be the barest hint of bitterness there- but it's faint. And at the link of her arm, he tightens the hold on it with his own, unsure at this point of which way the reassurance was directed....]

If only deciding to do something was as straightforward as doing so. And despite your stubbornness, [You always were, he does not say.] will you manage to defeat yourself, in the end...? I suppose you'll find out.

[omnicrafter]

...Hades. You know you're worth more than just the weight of those truths, blunt and unpleasant though they may be. You're more than just a moving prop in everyone else's stories, or an obstacle to be conquered. That's why I came to you in the first place.

[She smiles and squeezes his hand, a little wryly after what seems like a bittersweet admission. It is a heavy statement, in several different ways, despite the quiet way she delivers it.]

Well... I suppose I might be the only one who can. But I would like to think I can train myself in the right direction. Fray wanted to be heard, but in the future, I think she'd be okay with it if there was no need to say anything anymore, too. Maybe that's all she wanted in the first place.

[unsundered]

[The first gets a slight frown from him; of course he knew that. And when put like that, as though it were something he needed told, or was up to anyone else to decide... felt condescending.

But while he cools a degree, he doesn't argue it; not that unintentional condescension was much better, but he could guess it wasn't the intent, so he decides to ignore it.]

Well... if you created a self to tell you the things you had been avoiding, and then stop avoiding them on your own... she's served her function, hasn't she? Thusly satisfied you can handle the rest on your own... she may rest.

[omnicrafter]

[She nods with a short hum, something not sitting right with his response to the attempt at reassurance. Fray can rest, yes. It has been a long time coming. But...]

...You didn't like that, huh. Is it that you feel it's just lip service? Or something else?

[Her lips twitch. At the very least, if she's stepping on his toes again, she ought to know the how of it so she doesn't do it again.]

[unsundered]

[For a moment, he just looks at her with a continued frown. He'd thought it better to just let it lie, but... well, he supposes it's practice for seeing whether he can disagree with her without snapping at her.]

I'm aware that I'm other than a prop in your stories, Irhya- though it seems you Warriors are the ones worst at remembering that. Perhaps someone else would be comforted by the words of a great hero deciding they're worthy enough to be considered a person in their eyes, but--

[Though his tone is even enough, his look narrows.]

'Tis not a reassurance that's required- and coming from you, unwanted.

[omnicrafter]

...I see. [She shuts her eyes.] I apologize, then. And for Fray earlier, I suppose.

[So that's a yes. And yet, she isn't entirely sure how to cement it in place -- it frustrates her, more than a little, but perhaps that's just another instance of him being on the defensive with them, always.

...A taste of her own medicine, if she didn't know any better. Her lips thin out, and she falls quiet for a while, though she doesn't let go of his arm. Now, though, she has to wonder for whose sake she continues to hold on.]

I meant what I said about having respect for that, though. A lot of people would dance around it with reassurances that would just feel empty, in the end, and that's not what I want. I think I'm already better off than I was several years ago, but it's far from sorted out. I still need a better method... but that may take some time.

[unsundered]

[Defensive sorts, with much to be defensive about.

Were it anyone else, it was the sort of compliment he'd either accept with a shrug of acknowledgement or in the rarest of cases, genuine appreciation. But with these heroes... skepticism. Skepticism was at the fore, and it was hard to give them the benefit of the doubt, to not view it all through the lens of experience, history, and bias.]

Having your respect moves me little more.

[A statement followed by a huff of a breath; he couldn't tell if he was being unfair or too fair, and the uncertainty at least, keeps him from continuing further, even squeezing her arm after a moment. Glancing aside again, he stares out ahead of him.]

Time is all we have here, and in an amount none of us are privy to know. A pity then, that your newfound self-worth likely won't follow you home. An effort you'll have to repeat- and with no way of knowing of whatever strides you've made.

[omnicrafter]

Then why do you let me do this? Letting me talk to you about personal issues, you offering input, even when you let me touch you or hold your hand... Not to say I don't like it, but I just... I don't understand.

[She looks at him hard then, more confused than anything. It'd be one thing for him to reject her if she were saying these things on a passing whim, but right now, it's hard to make sense of what he's thinking. Perhaps she's about to ruin a good thing, but that'd probably be the delayed comeuppance she'd thought about earlier, for opening up to him when he simply doesn't care.

Maybe they're giving each other lip service, and she's just fooling herself to think otherwise. Suffice it to say these thoughts are exactly what she needs to fight against to accomplish her goal, but...]

I know it may not carry over. But it's worth trying for the time that I have here, at least. If there's a way to keep our memories, I'd like to give that choice to everyone. But we know so little right now, and people are taken away by the day...

[unsundered]

Is that something either of us really want an answer to?

[There's a warning in his tone, for all that he continues anyway.]

What does any of that have to do with caring for your respect, your consideration? Not all of us rely on others for our self-worth, Irhya. Besides-- [A sideways glance, given with his bad eye.] having to state such a thing, as though it were remarkable or noteworthy... only serves to insult. It implies that you only bother with it when I've provided you with something you want. Advice. Attention. Perhaps I should dispense with providing either.

[None of which really seemed to hit the core of the issue... which he yet had trouble identifying. Was it just another aspect of a lack of trust or forgiveness? Resentment?

He never had this problem with Rose or K'rihnn.]

[omnicrafter]

[Irhya makes a pained noise in the back of her throat, then stands up to take a few steps forward, letting go of his hand. The position of her ears makes no secret of her mood drop.]

This is what Fray was talking about. You shake your fist at me with one hand, and yet let me cling to you with the other. You couldn't give off more mixed signals if you tried. And then threatening to withdraw the little bit I can get out of you on top of that just because I asked for clarity...

[It hurts -- and she knows it's just because it's her. She bites her lip and sucks in a breath, digging deep for the strength to continue. The second she hits her bed, the bad thoughts are going to overwhelm -- maybe she should see who else is awake to talk to...]

I won't say I'll stop putting in the effort to be friendly with you, because I know I won't be able to stick to that. But if you've decided you don't want to meet me halfway anymore, I don't know what else to say. You don't trust me, you won't trust me, and if I'm the only one reaching out, nothing changes in the end.

Do you need anything before I go for the night? Food, tea?

[unsundered]

Or is it just a clarity you'd rather not hear?

[As she pulls back and stands up, Emet-Selch takes in the sight of her- distressed, dissatisfied, dismayed. A sight to further chill him in response- as though her words weren't enough to get his hackles raised. His reply comes without needing to think long about it.]

Or do you expect gratitude for deigning to give me your consideration? After all, you've tried for several months now- surely that entitles you something. You've rendered thousands of years of work for naught- an easy thing to counter with a sad look and a bit of praise to the departed. How terrible, to not embrace you with both arms. After all, you respect me. My consolation.

[Habit. Reflex. Honesty, in its most ruthless form. Lashing out because it's what he knew best; it didn't matter that he'd damage himself in the process.]

If you would prefer consistency, I think you know which direction it would lean in.

[A yet colder flash as he regards her, making no move to stand or approach. He'd thought he was trying- to not give in entirely to his own dissatisfaction, to not pull away or completely reject her. But that wasn't good enough; he didn't know what she wanted from him, apart from the 'truth' (but not too much of it). And in his own confusion, he shuts down.

Her last offer gets an incredulous stare; did he really seem like he'd want anything from her now?]

[omnicrafter]

I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want to know. It was merely the notion of you thinking to take that privilege away from me for just asking questions that bothers me.

[She doesn't see it. She doesn't see any of it, because she doesn't dare turn around to look at his face through his spiel. A deep sigh, after which she wilts like a flower.]

Regardless, I insulted you, and I'm sorry. I'll take my leave now.