middaeg | (closed)

Entry tags:

(closed)

Who: eren jaeger and jean kirstein
When: beginning of july
Where: a flowery cottage in need of trimming and a hole under one (used) two-person bed.
What: a horse claims a home that was once taken by a seraph and his dragon many moons ago. the seraph is gone, the dragon still goes there, and the horse has a gun.
Warnings: domestication and erejean* (*codeword for stupid bickering and ust)

[ moving around the quieter parts of the haven would take one to the less crowded grounds home to cottages scattered meters away from each other. this particular one seems well but abandoned upon wandering onto its thick territory; located near the curve of river temese, a petite blue cottage stands strong despite the overgrowth, telling the story of a home that probably was much too long ago to count now. there are plenty of flowers that poke out from the window cracks, roses of blue and violet opening their blooms to aefenglom's summer sun and closing into loose buds when night comes. old lamps by candlelight still sit on the outside patio, and seems to have some magical juice to it— as if used a few times, then forgotten. all it needs is a little shake to light the path to the door and inside.

most of it smells like humid green, sweetness, wood and overrun by nature, all thanks to the fantastical amount of roses planted and left to their own development. their colors are lovely and extraordinary, from reds to pinks to white crossbreeds of every hue imaginable. the interior is usable: there's a kitchen, a fireplace and even some blankets hanging off the living room couch. a short hallway leads to a bedroom— less flowers in there, but natural light pools from a framed window just below the cushions and lights the room with a moonlit shine.

the bed is made, surprisingly, despite the smell of a home that’s been closed for quite some time. not a crease is to be found and neatly folded by the corners, it invites any tired old chap to come rest for a little while . . . it doesn’t look as if anyone would come back after all, even if the roses are oddly taken care of (just really in need of a massive trim— careful with the thorns). ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ He was told there were many abandoned houses free for the claiming, and he trusts the person who had told him that enough to take their word for it. Though the month he had stayed with Mikasa was blissful, offering the kind of domestication he's always secretly longed for, Jean does also enjoy having his own space. He's used to staying with rowdy men and having the freedom to lounge about and act however he likes. It's awkward to be living with only women. He's settled for claiming one of the empty homes in the area. This way, he can still take the short walk to visit her often.

Given his tendency to live it up when the opportunity does arise (there are no opportunities where he comes from), it's only natural that this picturesque cottage overrun with beautiful rose blooms would catch his eye. A moment is taken to assess the likelihood that anyone actually still lives there, and after that moment, he takes his chances, picking up the old magic candle and making his way into the home.

The space is dusty but completely functional, and more than pleasing to the eye. If this is his to claim, he's definitely claiming it. And if someone does return? He'll simply apologise and be on his way. With an appraising nod, Jean sets his things down and decides to turn in for the night. ]

I guess I'll clean up tomorrow ... [ It's been a long day and he's tired. There's a second taken to give the strangely neat bed a confused look, before he decides not to think too hardly about it. His maneuvering gear gets stored in a bag by the door, and he keeps one gun at his bedside just in case a need to use it arises. Jean then climbs in, ruining the perfect sheets as he makes himself comfortable and tries to go to sleep. ]

Edited 2020-07-02 23:19 (UTC)

[ there’s been a disturbance in the force. eren can taste it (literally taste it) at three kilometer range only amplified by his tunnels. there was someone deathly close to one of them and the dragon always had the inclination to check on what it was if it stuck around for too long: animals, intruders or people actually looking for him. the path to this particular tunnel was used occasionally, marked by roses and the faraway aroma of a bonded no more.

there’s someone there is what made eren trek a little faster. realizing who it was slowed down the adrenaline leap but didn’t help in slowing the climb. closer to entry, silence. no movement beyond the occasional creak of the bed being used. eren reaches for the first floorboard and pries it open. the second, he slips on top of the first. third, fourth, fifth until it had space enough to fit his frame, and so on.

he tries his best to be quiet in both movement and where he sets the wood, how he presses belly first onto the floor and scents the cushion’s edge with a lean (long, you can probably see it flick), forked tongue. at worst, one of eren’s horns catches on the bed’s inner framing and forces a light thunk before he could backtrack to pull himself out. fuck. don’t wake pony is the worst game, and while eren’s tongue hardly ever seems to be wrong— he needs to see to verify. ]

[ Growing up in the Survey Corps, Jean's learned to sleep with at least his hearing still on the alert. It wouldn't do to wake up in the middle of an ambush, especially with the length of time it took for them to put their gear on and be battle ready. It's not like he's ever had the luxury of a peaceful night's sleep anyway, given the knowledge that there will always be some kind of danger afoot in the land they come from.

The light thunk catches his attention, making his rouse, and Jean shifts in the sheets, feeling himself slipping gradually into consciousness. With some annoyance, his eyes blink open. Then comes the gradual awareness that that sound had come from other his bed, and seemed to have been caused by something big. Trepidation sets in now, as Jean's hand gradually slides over to where he had placed that gun. There's something - or someone - here in the room with him, creeping around. ]

I don't want to shoot. [ He says, but he whips around and cocks his gun at the shadowy figure's thigh. A non-lethal area. ] So identify yourself.

[ If this being can even talk, that is. With barely any illumination, he can't make out what they are yet, and his eyes are going to need a moment to adjust. ]

[ by the time eren's out, jean might not have the light (or eyes) to see him in full, detail and all— but eren can see him, thin slit pupils engorging enough like a cat's in the night. the shadowed figure, as it rises from the floor and steps back to bring a long, dragging tail from underneath the bed was massive. seven feet in height from his hind claws to the top of his head, even larger when attention was added to two curving horns and protruding spines.

a massive thing that would've hurt him far before he was caught if that was the intention. it was him after all . . . here, of all places. ]

You came back.

[ his voice hadn't been one of complete surprise; that had come and gone when he was in the tunnels already, and seeing jean was the added confirmation. was it— reprive? maybe just an illusion with the smoothness of his words. the glimmering icy shine to his horns and talons are the same as his eyes: blue and familiar, bending his neck to look down even from a slight distance, two hands or so away from the bed's frame. ]

[ Anyone could mistake the looming being with the striking, incandescent eyes as a monstrous threat, especially with the way it slowly rose to full size, a stature so impressive Jean is forced to cast his gaze up toward the ceiling. Despite how Eren looks nothing like the Eren he grew up with, Jean's able to recognise him well enough once his eyes adjust to the low light, his stupidly large form committed to Jean's memory as one of the few times he's met Eren in what has probably been a year. The voice confirms it. He doesn't know what he should make from that tone in Eren's voice, though, whether his presence here is something Eren is happy about.

The gun is lowered and set down. He hopes he'll never be in a situation where he actually has to shoot his friend. It's actually relieving to him that Eren is still here, and he might have tried to find him after settling down, but being Jean, he doesn't let any of that show in his tone, which remains sardonic and brusque. ]

Yeah. Got a problem with that? [ Climbing out of bed now, he goes to activate one of those enchanted candles, holding it up so he can see Eren better. ]

Why the hell did you break into my home? [ 'His home', lol. ]

[ all his scales are a brilliant shimmer against the candle's dancing ember, made to mesh in the same orange hues of purple and charcoal. at least eren's expression doesn't quite give away any notice to his tone— it looks flat and as neutral as when he's always seen him recently.

maybe, like. mildly dead inside. the huff he gives in turn to "my home" sounds suspiciously like a sarcastic chuckle, but eren doesn't chuckle enough at all to make it seem as such. just a little vibration in his throat. looking around the walls of the bedroom and peeling his gaze off of jean, he directs to a vine that had grown wildly through the doorframe in a search for better light towards the window, a little baby bud growing strong at its end and facing the moonlight rays. persuing it. ]

If that's how things work, you're on my bed.

[ he's only half joking. maybe like a quarter joking. ]

[ Eren's response isn't what he had expected, but it explains why he's here at all. He did consider that the actual owner of this house might come back to find him stealing their bed at some point, but he hadn't expected it to be Eren. He's not really sure if this is a good thing or not. ]

Wait, this is actually your house ...? [ Eren living in such a quaint, picturesque little cottage is somehow the most surprising thing about today. Somehow, he had expected Eren to be some nomadic existence with how odd he can be. ]

And you still make your beds like a freaking nurse. [ The correct term would be 'like Levi taught you', but this is funnier, so he goes with that. ]

[ the small endings (or beginnings) of a 'tch slip from between eren's fangs. at least i make my bed, eren would say here if he were fifteen and grasping for an argument. not feeling it, jean's efforts get sucked into a void. ]

It's not, [ to make things clear, that was actually a joke. a partial joke, earlier. ] I just used to live here.

[ eren's gaze runs far away in thought when he finally turns his eyes from the flower bud between his talons back to jean, on the bed, as if looking at the bed but allowing the thought to take him elsewhere. it felt . . . so long ago. that's a two-person bed, you know. when his eyes fixate back onto the witch from a few second journey, eren steps toward the doorframe to poke his head, horns and all, into the hallway. ]

I'm just making sure the plants are alive, now.

[ he means he let them grow WILD and FREE ]

[ He's mildly disappointed that his remark hadn't solicited any response, but Jean's become used to this now. At least have the respect to react to his insults, wow.

The more quiet Eren has become, the more difficult he is to read, and Jean keeps his gaze mostly fixed on his old friend, trying to pick up the nuances that can help him understand him. He looks almost wistful, which is odd. There has to be a reason this is a double bed and Eren is maintaining a house (and garden) he doesn't even reside in. ]

Picking up gardening too ... You really have been here a while. [ But it's not bad. The most harmless thing Eren could be doing, really. ]

I was planning to stay here. Were you going to ask me to leave?

[ what reason did he have for kicking jean out of a house he barely used beyond a memory? even if he sat down and thought about it, come on. there were none. first of all— a scoff. ]

Like you’d let me. [ jean didn’t let himself get tossed around the first time, eren highly doubted he’d even entertain the thought seriously. with eren’s hands slipping into his front pockets as he looks around, his eyes fall on . . . more flowers. if you could call this gardening, sure. ] I’d ask if you’d keep them here.

[ the colorful roses— they all had a presence. a magical touch that still tasted like a fingerprint. the only thing other than the gift eren carried around his neck from time to time. ]

They aren’t mine.

[ It's true. He feels secure enough in their familiarity and friendship that he doesn't think Eren could ever do anything to scare him, no matter how big or powerful he becomes. Jean asked because he was trying to figure out how Eren feels about him living here, since it seems to be a place of some sentimental value. ]

Of course I'd keep them. The flowers make this cottage stand out from the rest. Why the hell wouldn't I wanna live it up in a nice house?

[ He may fall into his old habits of playing up his self-serving side, but the sentiment is there. Eren's making a harmless, sincere request of him and he sees no reason to refuse it. ]

Whose were they, then?

[ if there’s anything that’s worthy of— it’s a snort. of course jean would still want to live it up (and deny himself the pleasure because marco asked politely). an actual trip down the hallway happens as, step by step, eren’s rather long tail drags off after him. a trail of spines to follow as the dragon calls out: ]

My first Bond. [ it’s of real value, that word, but not one said with overwhelming sadness. there would always be a mikleo-shaped hole in him somewhere, it was part of having a bond in the first place— but he speaks evenly of him. well. like remembering someone with more fondness than melancholy. ] If you’re going to stay here, we’ll need to clean up.

[

we ]

[ Jean stands up and walks to the doorway, watching Eren as he wanders along the hall. He did intend to contact Eren at some point but he really hadn't expected it to be tonight, in the middle of the night. ]

Oh ... [ Bonds. Eren must definitely have had them, given how long he's stayed here and the fact that he's a monster with some good control over his instincts. It's only normal that he would wonder just what sort of bond this was, whether a transaction or something more intimate, but Jean's not going to ask because it doesn't feel like his business to know. ]

I was planning to do that in the morning. Some people try to sleep at night. [ Their last conversation over the watch that happened at three in the morning comes to mind. Though, hold on, Jean's mind catches up now. 'We'? ]

-- You're gonna help out?

[ eren would stop, occasionally, mostly to check on the flowers and where, exactly, they’ll need more cleaning power. all things considered, he had half the mind to start now, being restless. eventually, he slides a talon across the wall into the living room. even the couch was there, right in front of the fire place.

he would light it, to make it even hotter in here, but he considers jean in the picture and opts to take a seat at the edge of the sofa instead. ]

You’d do a shitty job, otherwise.

[ 👀 ]

Edited 2020-07-12 02:33 (UTC)

[ Jean eventually follows Eren into the hall. If asked why he's doing this rather than simply returning to sleep, he ... probably wouldn't have an answer to give and would try to divert the topic away. He doesn't join Eren on the sofa but leans against the nearby wall, crossing his arms. ]

What? What's wrong with the way I clean? [ Coming from the guy who doesn't make his bed unless asked to. Jean is a lot less messy than he used to be, but he still only cleans up when things start to look dirty. Bad habits stemming from having a coddling mother. ] Not everything has to be hospital-grade.

[ And Levi doesn't live here ... Though, he might be dealing with Levi-lite today. Still, the help is appreciated, even if Jean doesn't give him a 'thank you'. ]

[ your way is subpar, jean. anyway, with a roll of his shoulder and a lean forward, elbows to his knees and fingers weaved together, ]

We’ll start first thing in the morning. [ in a few hours. in the meantime . . . eren too, will not answer as to why he’s just going to sit in this house with jean instead of going back through the hole from which he came. some things are better left unanswered. ] . . . Witch suits you.

[ he just straight up tasted jean’s magic with his slick ass lizard tongue in the air, he did. ]

[ Don't tell him about tasting his magic, Eren, he's going to find that so weird. ]

I like it better than having scales on my ass. [ Sorry to whoever has scales on their ass, but he's so grateful for his witch designation. His only real problem is finding a bond before his magic gets out of hand. Now Jean steps forward, walking closer to Eren. There's no real reason, really; it's just so they can talk. In the dimmed light of his candle, he suddenly notices something different about Eren's face.

Moving in front of him, he reaches out to prod at the tiny nubs growing out of his head. Those weren't there the last time. ] When did you get these? Are you a baby faun? They look so stupid on you.

[ 👀 ]

[ he’d weave a comeback for that. he would’ve!!!! but the nubs— are sensitive. not in a way that hurts but in one that threatens to send a shiver up his dorsal spine. it rises in a split second erect while eren quickly swats jean’s hand away from the blunts. please. the person he least wants to pop a boner for is you, jean. ]

I think you need a better look.

[ come closer jean ]

[ Oh, this is fun. Eren is looking pretty annoyed, and when was the last time he was able to elicit exactly the kind of response he had wanted from the other boy? ]

What? Are they supposed to look cooler once I get closer? Nothing could ever make those things look cool. [ Jean takes those few steps closer, bending forward as his fingers reach out again in an attempt to press at the little growing nubs. He needs to get back at Eren for all the nonsense that had happened the last time Jean was in Aefenglom. ]

[ jean would earn only a warning glance as their heads align, just a little closer— all before the dragon's frame moves; his head swings mack only for the momentum and juts forward in an ugly sounding thud between two skulls. he headbutts him, hard, then suffers the recoil of blasted pressure on his forehead that made him . . . woozy. ]

[ Consider him headbutted. The collision sends Jean falling back, his butt making painful impact with the ground and his head ringing from the force it was dealt. He hadn't even hit Eren just now - he was just teasing him - so he finds this response so extreme and completely unfair. ]

OW! What the fuck --?! You know how thick your damn skull is?! [ It's a little too early for a squabble, but Jean throws an arm forward to attempt to grab Eren's shirt so he can yank him hard in retaliation. ]

[ life is unfair, jean. not that eren had even measured strength already amplified by his monster type— a miscalculation when he probably didn't mean to hit him so hard. just enough to back off. but eren falters on one of his legs, just when eren seems to be sinking toward the sofa— he's tugged down, to his knees, still larger than jean even when both were on the floor. ]

Sss . . .

[ eren's eyes don't quiet fixate, and from his throat comes the smallest, constant forms of expression to something that feels good. blinking once, one eye, then the other, than both rapidly— ]

Edited 2020-07-19 14:58 (UTC)

[ eyes snap wide, pupils thinning from the brief pooling they found themselves in, and in an instant they refocus. ]

—Sorry, I, [ surprisingly, he doesn't fight back, doesn't make excuses and doesn't attempt to throw more fire to the flames. he only twists some fingers into jean's collar and attempts to hold him at armwing length, which, considering eren's wingspan— is pretty long, but halfway through he stops to gauge the reaction. calm down, and, ] sorry.

[ don't touch him there again ]

[ He doesn't know what to make out of this. Eren's unfocused and his body somewhat limp. He's dazed, reeling from the shock of the blow, and that wouldn't be so strange if this shock didn't seem so disproportionate to the actual blow. He knows Eren's taken many hits to the head - he's seen it himself - so there's no way he would be looking so out of it from just a simple headbutt. He should be getting up and fighting back right now, or at least shoving Jean away and making a dismissive remark. ]

Why the hell are you saying sorry -- [ You ought to say sorry, would be the response Jean would give if he were still feigning a combative attitude, but his confusion and budding concern lends itself to more honesty. When has Eren ever apologised after a stupid fight? ]

That was just a headbutt. What's going on with you? [ Since he's nosy, he reaches out in an attempt to touch that point of contact. Not to tease him this time, but to investigate. ]

[ fingers are coming and so are questions, to both which eren brazenly evades: jean's hand is guided elsewhere by the diverging wave of eren's forearm and the stretch of his other, hand twisted into fabric, to keep him at bay the best he could if little struggle against it was involved. his eyes focus, wander elsewhere, then fall to a point where he isn't quite looking at the witch. he's looking beyond his shoulder. he's doing what he hardly does but hopes he's doing a better job at faking it: he's avoiding eye contact. ]

I could've— cracked your head open, [ but he hesitates in voice, his scales are bright with sunset color and so are his scaley ears, no longer a plum-like black and then— eren pushes him away after a few blinks. ] just sit down.

[ he's getting to the point where the shuffling contact was starting to make his limbs tingle into one connected point, his mind is going places he doesn't want them to. the summer heat was to blame, eren would say, but he'd never say any of it out loud, here, nor with him. first horn touching and then— that. ]

[ This situation is just so bizarre. He can't figure it out. Jean does relent, scooting back to give the other boy some space, but he keeps his eyes fixed, confusion laden in his expression as he scrutinizes what he's looking at and tries to understand it. He prodded at Eren's horns, and that made Eren angry enough to headbutt him. That part makes perfect sense. It's everything else that happened that doesn't make any sense at all. Why is he acting like this now, like he's nervous for no reason when he, rightfully, should be his quiet and blunt self? ]

Like you could do shit to me -- [ Jean notices the colours in his face, taking on a sharp and accusatory tone immediately. ] Why are you blushing?!

[ WHY THIS SHIT AGAIN, IT'S A PERSONAL ATTACK ]

[ if only it were true, and if only eren were to open his mouth and explain yes if I’m not careful i could snap your arm like a twig but the future relies on it being pranced over. perhaps so that eren was able to direct some light to something that was more important now. like his raging dragon hormones right in the middle of summer plus being touched in all the right places at the wrong time by the wrong person. a predicament. ]

It’s not blushing, [ it doesn’t always mean blush, does it? eren never did look in the mirror here when he was angry, but his face and chest would burn and tingle harmlessly. ] they just— they do that. Like turning grey if I’m upset.

[ — he probably didn’t think to admit that, but it was better than admitting the other thing. ]

That's what blushing is, isn't it? [ A change in the colour of the skin, as a result of some sort of emotion. Jean's tone continues to be accusatory. Why is Eren like this and why does he have to make their relationship that has been palatable for years so, so weird? ]

If grey means you're upset, then what the hell do red and orange mean? What's this feeling right now supposed to be?

[ leave him alone........... he's horny............. ]

"Go to bed".

[ eren crosses his arms against his chest and rests his nape back against the sofa. saying anything else felt like it would compromise him— if the earlier information hadn't already. ]

You always have to be so weird. Can't be normal for just once in your life.

[ With a huff, Jean rises to his feet now, deciding to drop the topic. That definitely looks like blushing to him, but he can't pinpoint the reason for it, and he's usually able to put things together fairly easily. He can't be the reason for the way Eren is acting. That's not allowed, it's too strange, he's ruling that out before the notion even takes form --

There's no point pondering it, because it doesn't matter in the long run. Jean starts to walk in the direction of the hallway. ]

Are you sleeping here?

[ it's just— not something he wants to mention, for some weirdass reason. it wasn't embarrassment, maybe it was . . . oh, who knew. eren just knew he didn't want to think further on it. jean was just a friend and what he was feeling was what he could easily feel for anyone that moved, smelled like receptive pheromone or touched him during the heated summer months.

it was nothing and he'd rather it stay that way and have the blasted indication leave once fall springs back into their views. because that's all it was. closing his eyes, he crosses his wings over his chest. ]

We can start earlier and faster if I do. [ going back to his tunnel den and hiking all the way to the house again would be a time-waster. ] I'll wake you up.

[ This is for the best. Their whole interaction was taking a weird turn. After some rest, they can go back to normal. Come to think of it, though, he hasn't shared living quarters with Eren for at least over a year. Back in the barracks, they would all sleep together in the boys' room.

It hasn't been that long but it sure feels like it has. Strangely nostalgic. ]

Fine. I'm turning in. [ Jean enters the hallway that leads to his room. Before he disappears into his room, he calls out to the dragon in the living room: ]

... Goodnight. [ don't wake up him at ass-o-clock tho ]

[ sleeping off blush (and burning) is the best thing to do and eren, for the most part, is glad jean returns to his room. he has the privacy to relieve any seasonal tension and actually sleep. what would he think about? this place brought back a lot of memories. mikleo— he missed milkeo. others invaded too, mikasa, jean for a second, but focusing on an end sent it all into a box he was reluctant to open.

he'd only stare up at the ceiling until he was tired, smelling the cushions of the sofa and tasting dirt, plantlife, roses . . . and a tiny, tiny bit of his first bond still there.

sleep was fast; by five AM the dragon loses his slumber, jumps to it and slips to the tool cabinet. everything that they need is still there: buckets, cloths, brooms and mops, even natural liquid soap and some product that smells like lemon. levi taught him. with his hair in a bun and a triangle handkerchief tied across his temple to keep his hair out of the way, eren waltzes in to the bedroom. ]

Jean, [ no answer the first time, so the second earns a harmless few smacks popping against his cheek. ] get up.

[ Jean had to have gotten may 4 hours of sleep in total before he's feeling those persistent smacks against his cheek now. He's a regular human who needs at least 6. ]

What ... [ Groggy, with his hair wild and in disarray, he lazily pushes the offending hand away and tucks himself more snugly under the covers. ] Go away, old lady.

[ no. but, oh what was that he heard? old lady, was it? dreaming about her is so nice but he had to ruin it. hadn't eren told him some years ago? he hasn't learned a thing, has he? gently plucking the cover and dragging it away from jean's bundle— he smacks him harder. ]

Mom. [ stuffling his fingers with a bundle of blanket, eren wrenches the rest away to jostle the other's shoulder. ] You call her "Mom". Get up.

[ Jean gets smacked to the other side of the bed, the drag of the blankets being yanked from under his shoulder jostling him until he's on his side. He sits up, holding his bruised cheek and looking completely indignant at the rude awakening. ]

Ow! What the fuck?! Why did you hit me! [ He vaguely remembers the dream he had, but he doesn't really remember what it was he actually said. ]

To start cleaning.

[ now that that’s done, time to open the window and blinders and hello sunshi— oh it’s still dark. eren starts moving, either way, adjust the fabric around his head tighter before making his way to the doorframe. ]

. . . And for your mom.

[ that is all ]

What's this got to do with my mom ... [ He doesn't remember what he said, so he feels very undeserving of the smack he had gotten. It's like the entire world is unfair. When Eren tries to pull open the blinders, Jean prepares himself for the blinding sunlight, only for it to -- not come. ]

It's still dark you asshole!

Sunrise is in an hour, we'll be done before lunch. [ . . . more or less. eren only walks out of the room to retrieve another cloth for hair, an empty bucket, and a cleaning cloth. he could care less about your sleep, jean! they have work to do. things to distract with. ] I'll sweep, you get the dust.

I barely got four hours in because of you ... [ But he wouldn't be Jean if he didn't complain. With an exasperated sigh, Jean hops off the bed, taking that cloth and tying it over his hair. There's no point going back to sleep now, because Eren's going to be busying himself around the room and there's no way Jean can sleep like that.

Taking the cloth, he starts wiping the dust off the cabinet surfaces. ] It's been a long time since I've seen you act like this.

. . . Cleaning?

[ he’d forgotten that jean hadn’t been here long and eren, actually, had. the last time for them had probably been . . . maybe two years at most? it’ll be three for eren, when it came to cleaning anywhere near the scouts. or what was left of it. blinking (not really blinking— his third eyelid swipe sideways), eren finishes his pause with a cant of his head, sweeping from the back of the room and working his way up. ]

Guess it has. [ he honestly doesn’t remember the last time he did it back home. he completely disregarded himself after staying behind in marley, and while keeping clean after liberio was more habit than obligation . . . huh. ] We have time for that now.

Yeah. . . [ Having the cleanliness of the house be an actual priority speaks volumes for the peace they have right now. A dirty house is almost a happy problem. A silence falls as Jean takes a moment to appreciate the fact that all he really has to think about right now is getting this quaint little cottage clean. ]

I shouldn't feel happy that I came back. Yet, I do. [ Because he's always going to have a self-serving streak, despite how many changes he's made to the way he lives his life. Despite his whining earlier on, Jean falls easily into pace, scooping up the dirt Eren sweeps into a dustpan. ]

[ i shouldn’t feel happy, but i do. it’s a powerful statement that brings both a pleasant warmth to his gut while as well as an immediate drop, a twist— the sinking of a knife stuck in him and too stuck to be pulled out the easy way. the easy way could also be the hard way. eren’s lips pursed open and closed, briefly, enough that when he decides not to speak, it didn’t look as if he was going to, but words linger there in his thoughts and express through his eyes: i don’t know what to feel. even jean was better than him there— at least he was being honest.

his eyes have simmered into the distance he had always put between himself and his friends when he decided where his quest would lead him. maybe he should feel happy that they’re here, and he gets to spend time with them he otherwise wouldn’t. he’s been trying to tell himself that since jean said the h word two months ago, but what good would lying to himself do if . . . he still felt conflicted? that they couldn’t stay here or else everything he’s done would just be for him and—? how much of a selfish piece of shit could he be if that happened? one part of him wanted to stay too, but then abandon everything? everyone? his home, the friends that weren’t here, and the freedom he remembers blowing past his hair and cheeks?

he couldn’t. that and more sinks in his head, and eren continues the clean up without another word, even avoiding jean’s presence as he swiftly swept the room, moved the bed out of the way (single handedly) and goes off into the next room, and the next. he’d trim the plantlife after that, or even dip his arms in water to clean the dust off the walls and furniture if it meant not having to talk.

after they finish, he’ll join jean on the steps of the porch, two bottles in his hands and handing one to him. there was something else, but he sets it down out of the witch’s sights. ]

You just twist the top off.

[ then pow! instant beer. ]

[ He doesn't know what it is about what he had said, but it's like the mood had dropped right after that, Eren retreating back into his shell and becoming an almost non-presence in the house. Though the shitty attitude Eren had given him before was a pain at his side, it was that kind of banter that filled the room up with a warm, familiar energy. This was cold and uncomfortable.

The lack of a statement is a statement in itself. There's something on the other boy's mind, something eating at him, but he's decided against sharing it, once again keeping his train of thought a mystery for his friends to piece together on their own only after those thoughts have led to action. It's irritating, but Jean resigns to it. Fine. They can clean in silence if that's what Eren wants to do instead. He's not going to go begging to be let in. That's pathetic.

The rest of the cleaning goes quietly, efficiently, and without much joy - nothing more than a chore. When he thinks he's done his share, he sits on the porch to rest, and is surprised at the drink he's offered. ]

... Thanks. [ He can feel the mood lightening, becoming warmer. It's rare that they ever do something two regular guy friends would do together. Jean pops the top off, appreciating the scent of the alcohol. ]

We could have a toast. [ To what? He'll ... think about it later. ]

[ alcohol for lunch is the way to go. maybe they could grab something after, but their appetizer remains: beer. eren's third eyelid blinks at a "tost", a tost for what? the last time they drank together— what had eren toasted to again to start it all? did he even toast at all or did he just drink with the people he'd kill and pretend, for five seconds, that he wouldn't and they were all equal humans trying to live? not long after, the dragon initiates, clinking the top of jean's glass bottle whether he was ready for it or not. ]

To time.

[ he had to pull himself back together; snap some sense into that brat who always cried in his head from time to time. ]

Yeah. To time. [ Time to do as he pleases, time to spend with people he cares about, time to make new friends ... He hasn't had this kind of peace of mind for what feels like a long, long time. He's privileged to be in Aefenglom, even if he's always going to feel that pang of guilt when he thinks about the duties he's left behind.

Jean takes a generous sip of that beer, sighing in contentment. He doesn't say much after that, simply sitting back and enjoying the sunset. Though there's a lull of silence, this one isn't quite as uncomfortable as the last one was. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(closed)

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(1/2)

(2/2)

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

the h word ...damn is it that serious

you fuckin bet

no subject