[semi-open] Lay me down let the only sound be the overflow

[zewu_jun]

Who: Lan Xichen, cultivators, and friends!
When: Around mid-month
Where: Lakeside out beyond the Wall (near the forge)
What: swimming, sitting, sighing, and shedding
Warnings: F is for friends who do stuff together.



Everyone probably has their own reasons for being at the lake. For Lan Xichen, working in the forge tends to lead to overheating (especially when he's been fighting off certain stress levels) and the nearby water provides a good way to politely cool off. Maybe you met him on his way and decided to join in or maybe you were already there. After several days this becomes a regular pattern of work followed by an afternoon soak, so it's possibly just a nice diversion when things are a bit too much to handle.

Whether it is swimming, meditating, having a snack, or just enjoying the fresh air along the bank, there are plenty of ways to share time with friends. The only possible warning will come from Lan Xichen himself if it looks like an argument is brewing--he will intervene. He came explicitly for some quiet time, so if anyone starts a fight, they'll probably have a half-naked Lan there to break them up. Maybe that's your thing.

[ooc: This log is a free for all for swimming and lake side games. All our friends are invited to tag in and tag each other. Basically, make up whatever you would like as a starter and cut in wherever if people agree! Non-cultivator friends and 4th wallers also welcome. If you need a specific prompt added, poke me at teaandreveries.]

Comments

B

[taciturnly]

( oh, dear. he recognizes her instantly, a newcomer in his home and one that wei wuxian seems particularly fond of. lan wangji hasn’t mingled there long enough to know her well, though the panic on her face, in her voice, is easily noticeable. the changes some of them have undergone are peculiar at best; the unknown is unnerving, and lan wangji remembers wei wuxian’s concerns all too well not to extend a helping hand.

or two helping arms, anyway.

touch is a complicated thing. wei wuxian has always been the exception to the rule, but for this, he’ll make another one. upper body half-emerged, he looks up and nods, encouraging her to look back. his focus sharpens on her, a protective spell to keep her from falling and breaking the surface of the water. he spreads his arms open, patiently waiting. ) You may come down now. ( safely. just let go, sae. lan wangji will catch you. )

[shinkunochou]

[Ah, the big brother with a scary face...

Well, maybe scary wasn’t the right word. After all, there was little that truly frightened her anymore in terms of how someone or something looked. She’d seen the worst of twisted bodies and expressions frozen in the rigor of death. But Lan Wangji was... intimidating, certainly.

She’d only met him briefly and had instantly felt like it was better to give the man his space and try to take up as little space as possible. He simply exuded an aura that commanded respect and the best of manners.

When he approaches, she freezes, her wings stuttering slightly and making her drop about an inch before they start beating again, struggling to keep going.]

A-ah... [If she fell and hit the water anyhow... Would he still save her? It seems absurd to even question it, because surely no one would just stand by and watch someone drown, right?

(She’d thought they wouldn’t stand by to watch an innocent girl hang too)

After a moment she give a brief nod of understanding and takes a deep breath, squeezing her eyes shut and throwing her arms over her head as she lets her wings finally stop and plummets with a short scream back down to earth. Er. Water? Lan Wangji’s arms. Whatever.

Sae still keeps protectively huddled though regardless, shaking like a leaf.]

[taciturnly]

( how dare, lan wangji is the softest bean! just catch him while he’s staring at wei wuxian, and you’ll understand. she’s safe here. there’s only one person he’d willingly let drown—actually, make that about three, and he’d probably watch too—and lan wangji catches her effortlessly, careful not to crush her wings. it’s a loose embrace as he wades closer to the shore, channeling his energies to envelop her in a soothing cocoon in lieu of verbal reassurances. she seems so frail. so scared. he brings her back to safety, gently helping her back on her feet as he grabs his robes and waits for her to take them, a silent offer to keep warm.

if she doesn’t know how to swim, what in heaven’s name was she doing, trying to fly over a lake? ) Please use caution when exploring your new reality. ( he’s not exactly scolding her, though his tone brooks no disobedience, however gentle. )

[shinkunochou]

[She remains huddled against him, trembling at first, but slowly relaxing as the magic envelopes her.] It’s warm... [She mutters, surprised, and blinks slowly as she’s set down, taking the robes after a moment of hesitation.

She doesn’t quite put them on—they’d fit too awkwardly over the wings—but she drapes it over her arms and sort of clutches it close, looking up at Wangji with large, careful eyes. Her gaze then drops obediently and she nods.]

I’m sorry... Please don’t tell Wuxian-niisan.

[taciturnly]

( ...is she afraid of him? of wei ying. the way she’s so quick to obediently avert her gaze seems to have little to do with discipline and more to do with a kind of fear that lan wangji can’t exactly pinpoint. however strict his childhood, he never dreaded his uncle, and something sharp coils in his chest, cold on the way down. )

Mn. ( that’s his promise not to tell anyone, a sound for her to know, since she won’t look at him. wuji hops by and he picks her up, extending his hand for sae to pet her. ) Practice is in order. ( wuji also needs to learn how to fly properly, and lan wangji’s harsher edges visibly soften. ) I will help you.

[shinkunochou]

[She breathes out a sigh of relief and looks up then with a shy little smile, pleased. While she really liked Wei Wuxian, she didn’t want either him or Wangji to have a reason to throw her out or anything.

The appearance of Wuji makes her start in surprise, but then she lights up with delight, moving closer so that she can lavish the bunny with love, via strokes of its ears. Her soft giggle is cut off with a noise of surprise at Wangji’s offer how ever and she goes still, eyes wide.]

You don’t... You don’t have to. [Her wings flutter again and she flinches, brow furrowing and her mouth twisting in a frown as she keeps her gaze resolutely on the rabbit.] I... hate them... But I thought, maybe, if I could make them useful, they might not be so bad. But probably I shouldn’t bother... I’ll just end up being a burden on people if I keep asking for help.

[And one setback and she’s ready to take it as Failure Forever.]

[taciturnly]

( it’s easier to understand why wei wuxian took her under his wing (!). he’s always fought for justice and was always protective of those less fortunate, more vulnerable. sae’s baggage is clearly loaded, and if lan wangji can’t provide comfort the same way his brother might, he’s no less affected by her affliction. there’s no shame in asking for help. an odd thing to think maybe, for someone as stubborn as he is, but he wouldn’t be who and where he is now, if he’d never received any help. )

One must be taught in order to learn. ( he gives wuji a gentle push, butt wriggling as she ultimately jumps and glides and lands on sae’s head. ) We are who we choose to be. ( wings or no, and the scars on his back are a token of his own choices. )

[shinkunochou]

Oh! [She starts in surprise, rolling her eyes up in an attempt to see Wuji, giggles bubbling up in her throat again. She covers her mouth, holding the robes close to her again; The smell of sandalwood is rather soothing and she gives him a quietly appraising look as he speaks.]

But... How can we escape what we’re born into? Can you really fight fate like that? [The last time she’d tried, things had turned out so much worse for anyone.]

If you just...do what you’re told, and what everyone expects from you... Even if it’s terrible, at least no one gets hurt because you decided to stray from the path. [She pauses and then looks down again, covering the lower half of her face with an expression of shame. Sea wasn’t really meaning to argue, but they’re thoughts that had been swirling about in her mind for a while now, since—

The rope marks on her throat burn and she swallows hard around it.]

Sorry. I never used to question these things before... Wuxian-niisan said I can make my own decisions now that I’m here, but... [But she doesn’t know how to make those decisions for herself.

This conversation has nothing to do with her wings or wanting to fly anymore but whatever.]

[taciturnly]

( it’s a question he’s often asked himself. however different their circumstances, lan wangji can see a little of his younger self in her, and his chest swells painful. people get hurt, no matter what. even as a slave to perfunctory principles deemed right, lan wangji had to watch his beloved die, his inaction a regret that’ll always loom high and dark over his shoulders.

he shakes his head, eyes a little dimmer. ) Wei Ying is correct. ( his mouth faintly stretches, not quite a smile but something warmer, slightly forlorn. ) I lost him once. ( lashes drift lower, and he glances down, a hard swallow. ) I hesitated too long before I dared to think for myself, and he died. ( it’s a little more complicated than that, but lan wangji is convinced that his inability to take a clear stand played a giant role in wei wuxian’s demise.

his breath comes out a little shaky, and he looks back up, an encouraging nod. ) There is no black or white. ( a pause, and then... ) Only grey.

[shinkunochou]

[Wei Wuxian... Died? Her breath catches in her throat and she stares at Wangji openly in shock. Was he like her then, dead back home but inexplicably alive here?] I... [She swallows hard and looks down blankly at the ground and Wangji’s robes. Grey. Only grey...]

Then... How do you know what’s right or what’s wrong...? I... A friend... In my village. [She starts, vaguely, and then pauses, feeling dizzy. White hair and sad eyes. The encouragement that she had to leave, they had to be spared their fate.]

He helped us escape. Helped— Ah. [She’s not making sense, she realizes, her story disjointed as it claws at her.] My sister and I... are—were—are? Shrine maidens. In our village. Our friend helped us escape. But... Because we defied it, he...and my sister... I lost them both. And then shortly, everyone else... The whole village was...

[She trails off, reaching up to slowly and carefully extract Wuji from her head as she crouches down to make herself smaller. Wuji was cradled carefully in her arms, but her eyes aren’t really focused on the rabbit even as she strokes her and her wings.]

I thought... we were wrong. For running. Being shrine maidens—the things we had to do...were terrible. But the consequences of trying to stop it...Were worse. If we’d just given in and obeyed... She lowers her head to press her face lightly to Wuji’s fur.]

Or maybe I was just too weak. My heart was too weak to endure. If I’d been a little stronger...

[Sae falls silent. The wings flutter again, but she doesn’t flinch this time, just breathing in the smell of the rabbit and the faint sandalwood again. After a long moment she speaks up again] I want...to fly....

[taciturnly]

( her suffering is palpable, an echo in lan wangji’s blood, and he bows his head in both respect and sympathy. he’s not sure he understands everything, but the hardships she had to face seem much too great for someone so young. how do you separate right from wrong, and vice versa? it’s all a matter of perspective, and lan wangji can only offer the one thing that made the biggest difference in his life. ) My brother has always encouraged me to follow my heart.

( he drops to a crouch as well, and then sits in front of her, doing his best to exude nothing but calm. ) Choices are not bereft of consequences, but so long as you keep a clear conscience… ( he closes his eyes, palms on his knees. ) You will endure. ( he breathes in, out, keeping his eyes shut. ) Sit. ( before she can build her strength and fly, her darker energies should definitely be dealt with; thankfully, he brought his guqin with him. )

[shinkunochou]

My heart... [She echoes in a murmur, pressing one hand against her chest. Her heart had always been... well, Yae. Whatever Yae wanted, she wanted. They were the same soul, split in two according to the village’s beliefs, so Yae’s wants must be Sae’s too, right?

Except there was no Yae here and Sae didn’t truly harbor any illusions that she might show up—her luck wasn’t that good. Standing on her own two feet was terrifying. They were never supposed to be apart, but the promise of together forever could never truly be theirs’ could it.

Her gaze drops to Wuji and after a moment she kneels on the ground and sits back, resting the rabbit on her lap.] ...Okay.

[And then after another moment she speaks softly:] Thank you. I’m sorry... You didn’t come here to listen to me or anything like that. Whatever I’ve interrupted you from, I’m sorry.