[semi-closed] hello i walk into empty

[itsjiaheng]

Who: jongdae lee & folks!
When: aereuer 13th.
Where: the looking-glass house + memories
What: dream a little dream catch-all!!
Warnings: violence, gore, emotional/physical abuse, trauma, death (will update if anything further).




[ for most, jongdae's mirror is just as boring and plain as all the others. its bright, silvery glass is the only thing remarkable about it but then every mirror that isn't cracked and abandoned can claim the same.

those that know him a bit better can see some of the details emerge from the frame. the delineation of two distinct halves is the most obvious and noticeable — one half is rendered in a pale, nearly white wood while the other is rich and dark like ebony. they meet in stark lines of light and dark, swirling and tangling with each other along their boundaries. it's not at all a seamless transition, like the eye is meant to be drawn to the fact that they don't meet cleanly. it's all a bit lopsided as well, perhaps infuriating to those who prefer symmetry. the ebony wood more strongly encroaches upon the light wood, to the point that it might be more accurate not to say each colour occupies a strict half at all. along the topmost part of the frame the patterns come together to clearly form the digits 2 and 0.

it might be possible detect a deeper layer beyond that where the light wood is inlaid with gold that branches out into finer and smaller fractal patterns or where the wood has been carved into flowing shapes like feathered wings. similar designs appear on the dark wood as well, although the gold has been replaced with silver and the shapes are harsh and angular, soft feathers replaced with hard bone claws. ]

—

( OOC : for good organisational purposes because ya boi is scattered, i am keeping all the memshare stuff in this log. i'm also not writing open prompts just because i already have A LOT and this is sure to be A LOT so i want to make sure i have the capacity! HOWEVER if you'd like a memory and we haven't already talked via the cr meme or plurk you can also find a list of memory options here and you can contact me via pm, plurk (koutenko), or discord (koutenko#5884) and i will make for you a prompt!

i will keep adding to this as i write prompts~ )

Comments

⚡ @ sylvia (cw: bullying, slurs)

[itsjiaheng]

[ beyond the mirror, sylvia will find herself in what appears to be a school. regardless of one's country of origin, all schools essentially look the same. it's clear that it's an older building judging by the style. she is standing in the middle of a narrow hallway lined with windows to her left with two doorways leading to classrooms on her right. the doors slide rather than open out like in a more Western-style building. over the doorways signs denote which class is which but one of the signs appears blurred enough that she can't read what it might've said. the other is perfectly clear however, bearing a stylised image of a cartoon tiger and the kanji 虎 that reads tiger.

the windows look out over what appears to be a rural mountain village. there isn't anything particularly interesting or remarkable about the scenery, except for the fact that it seems very old-fashioned and very simple. there's a few very modern and sophisticated looking vehicles parked within view outside, but that's all.

the silence in the hall and the sound of muffled voices beyond the doors suggests class is in session. sylvia can notice now that the colours in the scene have shifted, like someone's started turning down the saturation on everything. that makes it very easy to notice the presence of a young boy walking down the hall towards her, familiar with his silver hair and light eyes. there seems to be plenty of colour around him that moves along with him, following his steps as he opens the sliding door to the tiger room and heads inside.

everyone stops what they're doing to look over at the intrusion, even the teacher lecturing at the board. there are at least twenty other children there, the variations in hairstyle suggesting they haven't just been copied and pasted entirely. they could have been, considering none of them bears a proper face. everything about them seems like someone took time to fill in the details but their faces are all the same flat blank void.

it's true of the teacher as well though for some reason sylvia has the distinct feeling that no one in this room is looking at the young jongdae with anything other than disdain and disapproval.

since you're late, you can be first, the woman says. the words "golden yellow" and "waves" come to mind for some reason. rather than head to sit down at the low table he occupied by himself, jongdae moves to stand at the front of the classroom. no one seems to find it strange that the faceless woman switches on what appears to be a geiger counter and starts waving the little metal rod around to scan him before she makes a note.

next, she presses a coin into jongdae's hand and mutters an instruction that sounds like gibberish to sylvia. whatever it is, jongdae seems to know it well as he stares down at the coin in his upturned palm.

if you wish hard enough, maybe someone will bring the poor prince more!

one of the boys comments, earning laughter from several of the other children. "indigo" and "half-circles" comes to mind this time. how the children arrived at theiir assumption is fairly clear, especially given that jongdae's uniform doesn't fit him well. it looks like someone bought clothing a size and a half too large, anticipating that he'll grow into them someday. in the meantime, he just looks bad. easy enough to assume that his family must be poor.

the teacher does nothing, continuing to watch jongdae as if she doesn't hear the other children teasing and laughing. jongdae is similarly unaffected despite their words, although the reason is clear soon enough.

the coin floats up out of jongdae's palm, suspended there in mid-air. it rotates a few times end over end before it simply drops and jongdae has to react quickly to catch it again out of the air.

the room is completely silent now as everyone stares at the front of the room. no one seems to know what to say. finally, the teacher grabs jongdae by the wrist so abruptly the coin falls from his hands and rolls noisily under a bookshelf. she examines his hands, turning them over and looking at each finger like she's on to something but there's nothing there at all to see.

he cheated, didn't he?

stupid little cheating konketsuji!

my dad says you can't trust people like him.. it's in his blood to be dishonest..

despite the facelessness of the class, it's clear exactly who said what. she can't see it, but sylvia just seems to know. along with that knowledge more words seem to pop right into her mind like before — "red" and "triangles" with one or "sky blue" and "uneven circles" with another. while she can think them, the meaning behind the words or why exactly they seem to relate uniquely to each person isn't clear on its own.

the teacher finally releases him, although the firm hold of her fingers on his wrist leaves him with a painful sensation that he tries to rub at discreetly. she rushes right out of the classroom, sliding the door closed behind her so hard that it bounces closed and then opens back up a little.

jongdae is left standing there where he is and completely at the mercy of his classmates. it's not as if anything's been done to silence them thus far, but without direct supervision they double their efforts. some of the boys closest to the front get up, forming a tight semi-circle that boxes jongdae in while some of the girls keep taunting as they try and find a good place to watch. jongdae couldn't fight all of them if he wanted to, definitely not the biggest child here.

even with the taunting of the others and the occasional shoves to try and get a rise out of him, jongdae never really reacts beyond some mild irritation that shows only on his face. naturally, that only makes the other children want to try harder. eventually backed up against the wall bearing the chalkboard, he finally responds with what he assumes might just get them to stop.

it's only a few simple pencils pulled from the teacher's desk, but the fact that they're suspended and kept floating around jongdae's head right now makes everyone else back off. the pencil tips point toward the ground rather than at any of the other children and the happy smile he's wearing shows how much more fascinated he is with the fact that he's managed to accomplish it than anything else, but the very same kids who definitely weren't trying to pull any punches a minute ago start screaming and carrying on now like he's pulled a real weapon on them.

the pencils fall to the ground harmlessly when the door opens again and their teacher returns with several other adults in tow, breaking his concentration. one of them is the director of the school, judging by her more formal dress and the badge she wears pinned to her lapel along side another button shaped like a stylised sun. she also seems to be somewhat less faceless than the others, the features of her face filled in enough to read her severe expression, at least. the woman crosses the room and no warning precedes the fact that she slaps him hard across the face, making the rest of the class wince and react (though clearly not out of sympathy). jongdae looks understandably startled by it considering he believes he hasn't done anything wrong, his eyes wordlessly seeking some kind of understanding. he never seems to even try to speak, even now when that would probably be reasonable.

out. now, the director commands, nudging him towards the door when he seems confused. another impression, "white" and "crossed lined" this time. the other children keep on with their snickering and small, biting commentary as he's marched out of the classroom. the other adults follow, leaving the original teacher behind with the rest of the class. sylvia can hear the teacher say something, gesturing in a way that's intended to be obviously comedic, but she can't understand the woman's words now. the other children erupt in loud laughter and just like their teacher the words they say are just empty sounds to sylvia's ears but it's rather obvious whose expense they are joking at. she only has similar vague impressions with no explanation as before — just more vague colours and shapes associated with each speaker.

when the door is slid closed again, jongdae is there leaning against it. it's the older, mirrorbound version of him now and he looks rather amused, if anything (and also as half-dead as the last time she'd seen him). ]

I guess if you're in here seeing things, you lucked out. Everything pretty much changed after this, so it's like my last good memory for awhile..

[ all things considered, he's very happy sylvia ended up here and not in some other, worse memory. comparatively, this probably is a good one.. ]

HERE. FINALLY.

[stardustish]

[ she immediately recognizes this as a school building because, yeah, they essentially look the same. she's not entirely sure whose memory this belongs to -- she saw a mirror and felt drawn to it, and got effectively pulled into it -- and despite the kanji and the image, she still can't quite figure it out. she takes a few steps into the hallway to investigate when the colors suddenly shift. and then... ]

Jongdae...?

[ ah. somehow, she's glad this memory is his and not some stranger's. she at least feels like she can talk to him about it, after it's done. it's...quite a vivid one, she'll admit -- but she follows him curiously into the room and she sees that he's met with hostility. not just from the teacher, but his peers as well. she frowns. this...hurts to watch. she's already bracing herself for something terrible to happen. ]

Oh no...

[ she can hear the words and the phrases in her head, and she's trying to parse them together -- but it's hard to focus over the sounds of the other students' mockery. it makes her see red. she keeps looking at jongdae though, waiting to see what comes next with the coin. then, it starts floating and rotating in mid-air, and she can't help but smile. she's not sure what the lesson here is supposed to be, but jongdae's doing something neat.

the mockery starts again though, and the words keep popping into her head -- there's so much happening at once, she's starting to feel overwhelmed. that plus her anger are not a good combination, and she turns to face the students, shouting: ]

What's wrong with you people?! Ugh!

[ she knows well that they can't hear her, but she can't hold it in. it angers her to see jongdae being treated like this.

then they start to gang up on him, and she gasps. she's caught with him in the center of the box, looking at the faceless students fearlessly. furiously. they can't see her, and they're damn well lucky that this is a memory or she'd give them a piece of her mind. then jongdae pulls the pencils and the students start shrieking -- she knows this isn't going to end well.

and it sure doesn't, when jongdae's wrongfully blamed for all of this. the look in his eyes, searching for answers when he didn't do anything wrong...hurts her. she looks heartbroken when he's marched out of the classroom. she steps towards the door...and gasps when the current jongdae shows himself. ]

...You call this a good memory?

[ well...she's sure learning a lot about him, now isn't she. she looks at him in disbelief. how could he call something like this a good thing? if he thinks this is alright, then she can't imagine what else he must have been through... ]

No, this...this isn't...

[ she can't find the right words to say. she falls silent for a moment, just looking at him. then, suddenly, she rushes up to him and wraps her arms around him, pulling him in for a tight hug. ]

I'M SORRY THIS IS ALSO A VERY OLD TAG

[itsjiaheng]

[ jongdae just stands there for a few moments, clearly confused while sylvia has her arms around him. he's not sure what to do exactly, lifting his hands and awkwardly hovering them while he debates whether or not he should be hugging her back in this situation. ]

Uh.. I mean—.. it's not a great look, I guess. But it's the first time my power ever worked. I was a weird kid who wasn't even good at basic stuff and I always felt like people were just waiting for something to happen and getting annoyed when it didn't. So.. I was really happy when something finally did..

[ he's not one to push anyone away in a situation like this and if he's being honest it's nice to have someone care about this kind of thing, so he'll just go ahead and let her decide when she wants to let go. this is fine. ]

It's alright though.. you don't have to feel sad about it..

EVEN OLDER TAG INCOMING...

[stardustish]

You -- you dummy, of course I'm gonna feel sad about it!

[ she's not going to let go regardless of whether or not he hugs her back, because this was so cruel. so unfair. and if this is good for jongdae, she can't imagine the other things he's had to endure. it's heartbreaking. ]

Ugh... Sorry, uh -- [ she pulls back after a good moment of hugging him and sniffles, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. is she...crying? ]

I super wish I could see your power for myself. Outside of this, you know? Because the things they were saying to you...

I couldn't stand any of it. I hate it when people talk to others that way.

[itsjiaheng]

[ his inclination is to downplay it again because it's true that it really ranked low on the list of things that ultimately bother him, but he hesitates because sylvia's not letting go.

which is still fine.

only this is one of those things he could probably get used to. in a completely pure and innocent way. because it's nice.

his eyes widen when he steps back and hears her sniffle though, clearly unsure if he ought to be doing something specific about that. ]

It was like this tiny, shitty little rural mountain town and everyone who lived there worked in the same place. And they're not a very good group either. Like weird politics and stuff. I lived in the city too so I know normal people aren't just.. like that for no good reason. So no real surprise their kids turned out weird too. Everyone knew what I was just looking at me. I mean—..

[ he gestures to himself like it should be obvious. ]

So I guess I was really fair game. Plus my father was a foreigner which probably wasn't popular with their weird politics but I guess he had something they needed more. Anyway.. I wish I could show it to you too. I got really good at it. I could move stuff but what was really important was that I could take stuff apart and put it together, even if I didn't know how it was all put together. Even really small things.

[ he is a very nervous talker, managing to ramble his way through all of that to the end and then abruptly realises he isn't sure what else he should say. ]

Yeah, it was pretty cool..

[stardustish]

Weird politics or not, you're here with people who care about you very much. I hope it's better for you here than where you were before...

[ she looks pretty sheepish at her own display of emotion. she sniffles again and her eyes are clearly watery, but she's trying to hold it together. ... and kind of succeeding, at least. ]

That does sound cool. Hey...maybe one day, I'll get to see it for myself. You know, if you ever get your abilities back or something.

That'd be nice.

[itsjiaheng]

Yeah. You never know, I guess. Something weird could happen like when people started coming out of people's bathroom mirrors and fountains and stuff, only with everybody's powers.

[ he picks a pencil up off one of the desks and plays with it, having learned the sort of mindless pen tricks that look more complicated than they probably are. ]

It's my—.. what is this? A dream? Inside my head? You'd think the person it belongs to should be able to do whatever they want..

[ he pauses again, because he really does just say stuff sometimes to avoid having to say what he really should be saying. ]

It is better now, yeah. I just don't want to be an inconvenience to anyone. We're all trying to figure out why we're here and what's happening and all this monster shit too..? Like.. that's important stuff.

[stardustish]

Geez, that's pretty lame. Not you, but just -- you can't even use your powers in your own dreams!

[ she pauses, though, at that last part. ]

You're right, it is important. But I don't think it's fair to dismiss your own struggles either! It's okay to talk about this stuff, Jongdae. I don't think it's inconveniencing anyone.

[itsjiaheng]

Even if I felt like that though, how do you just—...?

[ jongdae waves his hands a little like that's going to make the point without the words he's missing. one can assume he's referring to just going up to someone and talking about things that aren't just random, trivial things. ]

This kind of stuff's pretty heavy, so it'd be asking someone to carry it. And then I wouldn't know for sure if I know someone well enough that they'd be willing to. I mean, if someone wanted to talk to me I wouldn't mind. Just saying that's kind of how I think about it for other people..

[ enough with the awkward handwaving he shoves them in his pockets just to stop. ]

Uh.. anyway.. I don't know how this works exactly. Didn't mean to trap you here like, in my head..