[Gon is a little curious by Reynir's animated receptiveness to Gon's words, and he blinks as he his ankles, listening intently.]
Hmmm... I mean, it's a little understandable, right?
[Gon rolls his eyes, kicking his crossed ankles as he thinks about how to articulate it.]
How do I say... I was hesitant to make a Bond, too. It probably sounds crazy for me to say something like this, but there's some kinda deeper, scary stuff in me I don't want other people to experience or see...
[Gon's eyes fall back on Reynir, leaning forward with some exaggeration.]
So I didn't even want Killua to Bond with me, even though he already knows that stuff! Maybe your friend Onni feels something similar. [Gon tilts his head with a thoughtful hum, eyeing Reynir with weighing measure.] Sometimes it's scary for people to know you too closely... Or to be so connected they can't escape from those parts of you.
But!
[Gon lifts a finger, expression warming with giddiness as he giggles airily, swinging his legs again.]
I was of course stupid for thinking that, and everything's fine! Being Bonded feels really great. When we touch it somehow feels even better than it used to, and sometimes if I'm in pain cuz of Monster growth stuff, contact helps alleviate it, so that's convenient! And sometimes when Killua's really, really happy, I can feel it. Even if he's being shy, and doesn't want to show it. It's nice.
Even if I had to feel his pain or his sadness, I wouldn't mind. Having a Bond is still a little stressful cuz I don't want him to feel burdened, but it's been great so far. I'm really happy we decided to do it.
Edited (SORRY ALSO FOR EDITS) 2020-08-24 06:19 (UTC)
[ Gon's answer surprises him, and bit by bit that excitable, uncertain energy drains out of him as he just... listens. He can't help being curious, what that deeper, scarier stuff is. He knows better than most that a cheerful exterior doesn't mean a cheerful, uncomplicated interior. You can never tell just looking at someone what they've been through, the sort of experiences they've had and the sort of person they can be in situations of great stress or tragedy.
He had been uncomplicated, for the most part, at Gon's age. But he can't be much older than Onni was when his whole village was wiped out and he had to start looking after Tuuri and Lalli.
Of course, he isn't about to actually ask. Even for Gon to allude to those kinds of things is a sign of trust that Reynir appreciates, though he knows he hasn't really earned it yet. So he merely says: ]
It doesn't sound crazy at all.
[ He keeps his green eyes fixed on Gon, forgetting all about his juice and everything else, apart from the insight he's offering into what Onni might be feeling. ]
I think... you're right, and he's a little scared to be known. Even if it's just me and- and I think he knows I would never hurt him, intentionally.
[ The more Gon talks about what his Bond with Killua, the more Reynir's chest seems to fill up with a kind of restless, bubbling happiness. Because... honestly, it all sounds great to him, too. If he could relieve pain just by touching Onni. If he had a little more information on how Onni is feeling, so he wouldn't need to worry so blindly... if he could use that connection to help Onni carry the weight of his sadness when it gets too much. ]
Well, I'm- sure he wouldn't think of you as a burden. This guy - Killua? He's your friend, right? Then - I'm sure he feels just the way you do, that he wouldn't mind the pain and sadness, if it means he can help you carry it.
Yeah? That's good, [Gon answers with a small laugh when Reynir says it isn't crazy, and wonders how deep that reassurance really goes. is it polite face saving, or does Reynir have his own stuff? probably the latter... Gon's finding that everyone's more or less been through something hard, though people's timelines might differ from Gon's.
you know, Growing Up realizations.
to Reynir's assessment, Gon blinks, then his face turns a little pink, ankles recrossing the opposite way as he swings his legs, ruffling the spiky hair of his nape again. Gon knows that, but he does have to be reminded; his guilt still drags him down, makes him worry about being a fussy burden. and it feels nice to hear it, all the same.]
Yeah, that sounds like him. I know you're right. He's just been putting up with me doing crazy stuff for such a long time; I was a little thoughtless! So I'm trying to be better. I'd do it either way, but the Bond's a good opportunity.
[Gon straightens up a little, having another sip of the juice&madsh;and he smiles at Reynir, wiping his mouth.]
Have you and Onni been friends for a long time? I kinda wanna hear more about it.
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SORRY FOR ESSAY
Hmmm... I mean, it's a little understandable, right?
[Gon rolls his eyes, kicking his crossed ankles as he thinks about how to articulate it.]
How do I say... I was hesitant to make a Bond, too. It probably sounds crazy for me to say something like this, but there's some kinda deeper, scary stuff in me I don't want other people to experience or see...
[Gon's eyes fall back on Reynir, leaning forward with some exaggeration.]
So I didn't even want Killua to Bond with me, even though he already knows that stuff! Maybe your friend Onni feels something similar. [Gon tilts his head with a thoughtful hum, eyeing Reynir with weighing measure.] Sometimes it's scary for people to know you too closely... Or to be so connected they can't escape from those parts of you.
But!
[Gon lifts a finger, expression warming with giddiness as he giggles airily, swinging his legs again.]
I was of course stupid for thinking that, and everything's fine! Being Bonded feels really great. When we touch it somehow feels even better than it used to, and sometimes if I'm in pain cuz of Monster growth stuff, contact helps alleviate it, so that's convenient! And sometimes when Killua's really, really happy, I can feel it. Even if he's being shy, and doesn't want to show it. It's nice.
Even if I had to feel his pain or his sadness, I wouldn't mind. Having a Bond is still a little stressful cuz I don't want him to feel burdened, but it's been great so far. I'm really happy we decided to do it.
never apologize for essay or edits
He had been uncomplicated, for the most part, at Gon's age. But he can't be much older than Onni was when his whole village was wiped out and he had to start looking after Tuuri and Lalli.
Of course, he isn't about to actually ask. Even for Gon to allude to those kinds of things is a sign of trust that Reynir appreciates, though he knows he hasn't really earned it yet. So he merely says: ]
It doesn't sound crazy at all.
[ He keeps his green eyes fixed on Gon, forgetting all about his juice and everything else, apart from the insight he's offering into what Onni might be feeling. ]
I think... you're right, and he's a little scared to be known. Even if it's just me and- and I think he knows I would never hurt him, intentionally.
[ The more Gon talks about what his Bond with Killua, the more Reynir's chest seems to fill up with a kind of restless, bubbling happiness. Because... honestly, it all sounds great to him, too. If he could relieve pain just by touching Onni. If he had a little more information on how Onni is feeling, so he wouldn't need to worry so blindly... if he could use that connection to help Onni carry the weight of his sadness when it gets too much. ]
Well, I'm- sure he wouldn't think of you as a burden. This guy - Killua? He's your friend, right? Then - I'm sure he feels just the way you do, that he wouldn't mind the pain and sadness, if it means he can help you carry it.
no subject
you know, Growing Up realizations.
to Reynir's assessment, Gon blinks, then his face turns a little pink, ankles recrossing the opposite way as he swings his legs, ruffling the spiky hair of his nape again. Gon knows that, but he does have to be reminded; his guilt still drags him down, makes him worry about being a fussy burden. and it feels nice to hear it, all the same.]
Yeah, that sounds like him. I know you're right. He's just been putting up with me doing crazy stuff for such a long time; I was a little thoughtless! So I'm trying to be better. I'd do it either way, but the Bond's a good opportunity.
[Gon straightens up a little, having another sip of the juice&madsh;and he smiles at Reynir, wiping his mouth.]
Have you and Onni been friends for a long time? I kinda wanna hear more about it.