[Onni feels strangely devoid of anxiety, suddenly. There are witches standing all around them and Reynir is holding his hands, squeezing tightly, looking nervous and hesitant, closing his eyes (probably to try to think) and then opening them to look at Onni. For a second, they stand there, and Onni feels a deep, deep sense of being completely exposed and vulnerable. It isn't the group around them that's giving him that feeling, but the way Reynir looks at him as he starts to talk.
The vows that he says are surprisingly affecting, and with a dawning sense of horror, Onni feels his eyes going slightly wet, without having any idea why. Taking a few cautious breaths, he tries to hold back the wave of emotion that builds up in him at having someone say he wants to talk to Onni about everything that happens in his life before anyone else, that he wants to be trusted by him and learn from him and teach him, that he loves him and wants to look out for him. For a moment, Onni is bowled over by it. He didn't know that this was how Reynir felt about him, though some part of him thinks that maybe he should have known. It just doesn't make much sense.
When Reynir finishes and the witch leading the ceremony nods at Onni to encourage him to speak his own vows, suddenly his mind is completely blank. He doesn't have anything in him that's as earnest and kind and open and full of love as what Reynir had just said. But he has to speak, he has to make a vow, he has to say something. So he holds his breath for a moment, closes his own eyes, and draws up all the things he'd been thinking of earlier in the day, the conversation he'd had with Reynir about Reynir's monster changes and learning about frivolous things and the way Reynir had said he loved him and wanted to take care of him (and he realizes, abruptly, why that hit him so hard - the last person to say anything like that to him had been Tuuri, and before that, his mother).
He summons the soul of what he wants to say, and then opens his eyes, meeting Reynir's. As he speaks, he tries not to think too hard, he tries to put voice to the shapeless feelings and energies inside him, and because of that it comes out of him in that familiar Kalevala metre that flows from him so easily.]
You know that I think the world is a terrible place. That much hasn't changed. It used to be that everything was terrible outside of the tiny piece of the world I lived in, just me and everyone I had left. I still think the world is terrible, but...
[A pause, and he takes a deep breath before continuing.]
But then there was you, in my dreams and in my space and then eventually in my real life. You didn't make the world less terrible, but you made the part of it that I live in, that part of it that I feel like I can be safe in much bigger. Do you understand?
[A pause, and he forces a few deep breaths again, holding Reynir's eyes, his own almost glowingly pale and serious.]
I promise to keep letting you do that. It sounds stupid and small, but I don't let anyone do that. I promise to let myself trust you. I will keep believing in you and I'll keep you safe. You're a person I care about, and I will treat you that way. I...promise to be careful with you, and help you make use of your potential.
[For a moment, he holds his breath again, and then he nods at the witch doing the ceremony to indicate that he's done.]
no subject
The vows that he says are surprisingly affecting, and with a dawning sense of horror, Onni feels his eyes going slightly wet, without having any idea why. Taking a few cautious breaths, he tries to hold back the wave of emotion that builds up in him at having someone say he wants to talk to Onni about everything that happens in his life before anyone else, that he wants to be trusted by him and learn from him and teach him, that he loves him and wants to look out for him. For a moment, Onni is bowled over by it. He didn't know that this was how Reynir felt about him, though some part of him thinks that maybe he should have known. It just doesn't make much sense.
When Reynir finishes and the witch leading the ceremony nods at Onni to encourage him to speak his own vows, suddenly his mind is completely blank. He doesn't have anything in him that's as earnest and kind and open and full of love as what Reynir had just said. But he has to speak, he has to make a vow, he has to say something. So he holds his breath for a moment, closes his own eyes, and draws up all the things he'd been thinking of earlier in the day, the conversation he'd had with Reynir about Reynir's monster changes and learning about frivolous things and the way Reynir had said he loved him and wanted to take care of him (and he realizes, abruptly, why that hit him so hard - the last person to say anything like that to him had been Tuuri, and before that, his mother).
He summons the soul of what he wants to say, and then opens his eyes, meeting Reynir's. As he speaks, he tries not to think too hard, he tries to put voice to the shapeless feelings and energies inside him, and because of that it comes out of him in that familiar Kalevala metre that flows from him so easily.]
You know that I think the world is a terrible place. That much hasn't changed. It used to be that everything was terrible outside of the tiny piece of the world I lived in, just me and everyone I had left. I still think the world is terrible, but...
[A pause, and he takes a deep breath before continuing.]
But then there was you, in my dreams and in my space and then eventually in my real life. You didn't make the world less terrible, but you made the part of it that I live in, that part of it that I feel like I can be safe in much bigger. Do you understand?
[A pause, and he forces a few deep breaths again, holding Reynir's eyes, his own almost glowingly pale and serious.]
I promise to keep letting you do that. It sounds stupid and small, but I don't let anyone do that. I promise to let myself trust you. I will keep believing in you and I'll keep you safe. You're a person I care about, and I will treat you that way. I...promise to be careful with you, and help you make use of your potential.
[For a moment, he holds his breath again, and then he nods at the witch doing the ceremony to indicate that he's done.]