[It's true, Emet-Selch doesn't care terribly far for the state or length of Vanitas' hair, and the kid would likely would get more in the way of idle mockery if he severely botched an attempted haircut. But it was just such a... normal thing for someone like Vanitas to be frustrated by, that it bypassed his usual inclination towards casual derision.

No worries, though, as he smirks at Vanitas' faux surprise, peering even closer at the Terrible Bangs, taking full advantage of his superior height. His tone is a theatrical imitation of earnest concern.]

Ah, am I the first to inform you? No doubt all others were frightened off by your display, fearing for whatever demons might think to possess you.

[And now, a generous imparting of Ancient Wisdom:]

They're called 'scissors.' Though a sharp blade on its own should suffice if you're desperate.