middaeg | All I have is one last chance

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All I have is one last chance

Who: Yosuke Hanamura and Yu Narukami
When: New Moon, May 22
Where: Rooftop of someone's house
What: Yosuke finally finds Yu and brings him home
Warnings: none

Yosuke still didn't really know how he felt. Was this something you could figure out in two weeks? It had been a long, quiet two weeks. Well, "quiet". The house was quiet. But he could still feel, faintly, was Yu was feeling. He seemed to still be upset and scared. But it wasn't as prominent as before, no random thought intrusions either. He also managed to keep things clean and tidy, found some clothes for Yu when he came back (biggest size he could find and stretchy), and just sort of worked of his magic while trying to figure out his feelings.

He was pretty sure he was just stupid at this point, not knowing what the answer was at this point. He wasn't... upset? A bit scared, maybe. Not because of Yu being gay and hurting him or anything really stupid like that. He wasn't like that anymore. Yosuke did want to freak out a little since he hadn't thought about guys like that and he was pretty solidly still into girls. But honestly, if there had to be a guy he had to choose to date... it's not like Yu wouldn't be a good idea. He was basically boyfriend material, although he had only really seen it with the girls (as much as he could when they just threw themselves at him). But more than that, Yosuke was already best friends with him. He knew him better than anyone and they both knew it since Yosuke lamented all the times the girls sometimes didn't believe just how dorky Yu could be. They saw his weird side, sure, but they never saw just how weird he could get. It was pretty adorable, honestly.

And being without Yu was also bringing things into perspective. A lot of it familiar since this wasn't the first time he had to be separated from his best friend. He just never put two and two together until now. A lot of what he felt was when he had crushes on girls, he was just never best friends with them so it was easy to mix up. But then came the insecurity. Why did Yu even like him? Wouldn't Yosuke just screw things up? He's pretty sure he already did, actually. So, Yosuke was still a bit confused like he was in the beginning, but he had an idea of what to do. First things first was to get Yu to come back home. The house smelled very floral and herbal, Yosuke had been really hard at work with learning potions and spells made from natural ingredients. He wanted to find something that would help Yu without really changing anything about him. What he had come up with now sat in his pocket as he walked towards the place he knew Yu was at. He held the satchel handle of his bag with both hands, nervously squeezing it as he approached.

He wasn't scared of Yu. But he was scared Yu would run away from him again. Even if with his power at its strongest right now, Yu was likely still far stronger and faster. No, he had to try still.

Yosuke stopped in front of the house he knew Yu was at and he could see his form on the roof. He wasn't going to be able to climb, but there was a window that led right out to the roof. Yosuke went inside (with permission if people lived there) and made his way up. He opened the window silently and slowly, carefully, made his way to his friend.

"Partner?"

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I had been a hard two weeks. Each time Yu had wanted to go back home, he had to stop himself. And there were many times, during each day that his brain would naturally just go back to going home. He knew he had to return eventually, but figured if he could find a way to help himself first, it would be...better somehow?

He hated that he had to run away with his tail between his legs. Metaphorically and physically.

Despite all of this, when he saw Yosuke, he looks more paralyzed in place and surprised that his friend is there than anything else. Urging between hugging him and making a run for it before he hurts him again. The claws were not as sharp as before but the image of what he'd tried to do was still stuck in his brain, replaced each time he though about going back home.

"..."

He's not making a run for it, but his eyes are darting back and forth as he looks at Yosuke.

"How did you find me?"

There was still a scar on his cheek. It hadn't healed fully despite Elliot's magic. And eventually, on the warmer days, Yu would see the same ones on his arm. But they didn't hurt anymore, they were all sealed up and while he still need to be careful on stretching the skin too much as it was still technically healing, he was fine.

Yosuke stopped moving closer when he saw the look in Yu's eyes. He hadn't made a run for it, but he was going to. He was likely trying to find an opportunity. Yosuke had to figure out a way to stop him before he did. He let go of his satchel and set it down carefully on the rooftop. It was at an angle where it didn't slid, just rested against the little window. The actual spell was in his pocket but he couldn't go for it yet.

"Our bond," He answered. "You're kind of like a beacon right now. Um, can we talk?"

"Our bond," he echoed, scratching the back of his neck, distracted. Sometimes he regretted them bonding after what happened. The guilt he felt probably pooled itself towards Yosuke briefly before he tried to brush it off.

"We can but...I'm too dangerous right now."

He felt that. But he decided to push forward. He knew Yu didn't really mean it, he was just scared. Like Yosuke was back during the Full Moon. It was just... a lot going on right now. He chanced a step forward and shook his head.

"It's a New Moon today," He said. "Which means you're actually at your weakest. That's what the others told me, anyway. So I'm sure you're fine."

He stepped forward again.

"Maybe but I still have claws..." And the growing urge to just run away. "Yosuke I'm not fine." He opened his mouth, displaying his fangs. "You can't call that 'fine!'"

The last part was more of a snarl, panicked and realizing what he was doing it took a single step backwards.

He could feel it.

"They aren't gonna go away, partner!" Yosuke continued forward despite the snarl. He had to show Yu that he wasn't afraid. He had to feel it! "Running away won't solve it either."

The movement was brisk. He wanted to stay. He could feel his friend's courage and maybe that's why there was the slightest hesitation before he turned around.

"I'm sorry, Yosuke."

With that, he attempted to jump off to the nearest building.

The hesitation was all he needed really. Yosuke was quick and risked his balance on the roof to quickly pull the satchel from his pocket and just as Yu tried to jump, the leather strap went over his head. Yosuke lost his balance and landed on his knees on the tile, sliding shortly after and only stopping due to the gutters. "Phew..."

Yosuke was risking everything. That's probably why Yu didn't turn back and whack him like he thought it might be best to do - but he knew it wasn't. Maybe he could go on and--

--and---

--and?

It was almost as if something inside of him felt instantly calmed down and his worries evaporated in the smell of lavender and...other smells (he wasn't sure what at the moment). There was almost like a weird purr from his lips as his eyes became less silted and more large like a human's.

What had Yosuke given him? ~~Drugs?~~

He stopped mid run to look back at him with a much more human smile. He seemed rather calm now.

"I think that did something..."

Except the part where he fell off the building.

"Oh no..."

A normal human would have cried out dropping but whatever he'd been given had subdued him to the point where Yu's reaction was less of an OH SHIT and more of a 'welp better get it over with then.'

He landed mere seconds later, almost comically like an anime on the ground before uttering a very unconvincing;

"...Ow."

Yosuke had not expected the spell to be that strong. He just needed Yu to calm down, so he'd picked herbs and crystals known for calming anxiety and such (lavender, peppermint, a rose quartz crystal, and a sodalite stone) and put them in a satchel and imbued them with magic to activate. But geez, he had not meant to do that!

He was quick to get up, wincing because wow did he really skin his knees?, and made his way down as quick as possible. Yu didn't look hurt and that "ow" was just a dull and calm as Yu can be on his weirdest days ("I think I might be dying" when Teddie bit him comes to mind). He ran to the backyard and approached the still downed chimera and knelt down. "Partner?"

"Yeah."

He looked fine, large fall withstanding. Maybe more bruised due to his ego than anything else. He put one of his hands on his head and there wasn't even a bump.

"What did you do exactly? I feel...really calm."

"Uh... it's a charm I made," Yosuke replied, reaching out to point at the charm around Yu's neck. He lifted it to show, the leather bag hid what was inside but Yu would likely feel it if he pinched it. "Lavender and peppermint tend to help people relax and rose quartz and sodalite I guess do the same but with like... energy. Y'know, like that crystal healing stuff back home that's usually pretty bogus? Works here."

"That's amazing...par-" He stops halfway, briefly looking away due to seeing the scar still fresh on his friend's face as he touched the bag.

No. No he doesn't deserve to call him partner right now with everything that happened. The guilt would probably reach Yosuke as well as he finished dusting himself off.

"It smells very nice too."

Yosuke couldn’t help the disappointment when Yu stopped halfway with the nickname. The guilt didn’t help matters and his own hurt increased. He gripped the messenger bag strap as he struggled through these feelings. Worst yet, he still wasn’t completely sure of his own feelings. He had an idea but now wasn’t the time for being unsure about that.

“Promise me you won’t run away again,” He said suddenly. Quickly. “Please?”

He felt almost like Yosuke had shone a light at him and he stood there half frightened at his words.

"I can't promise I won't run away," he began, but quickly added so that Yosuke did not get the wrong idea, "...because sometimes I can't control myself. But I'll do everything so it doesn't happen again. That, I can promise."

Hopefully that would be good enough.

Yosuke let out a breath. It would have to do. His eyes shifted to the side, fingers clenching tighter at his bag. Yu would likely feel the nervousness by now. He was scared, too. This could totally change things between them but it wasn’t fair for Yosuke to keep this to himself.

“I... Partner, back during the full moon, I...” His cheeks reddened as he stammered. “I could hear your thoughts. I-um... I know how you feel. About me.”

He didn’t bother asking why Yu never told him. Yosuke had been such an ass about that stuff before so of course Yu would keep that to himself.

“B-But I’m not like... weirded out by it or anything! And I get why you wanted to keep it to yourself! I’m just... I’m sorry I overheard since that’s l-like a total invasion of privacy and stuff.”

He was rambling. But what he said was true. He wouldn’t be here if he had a problem with it and he hoped Yu could at least feel that between them. Yosuke wanted Yu to come home. Really, really bad.

Yu might have been strong as a Chimera but somehow he found himself sitting down on the ground again, having been given a punch to the metaphorical gut.

"Oh."

Oh, as far as Yu's mind was concerned, was a very big thing. He felt his own chest becoming red-hot, his eyes turning away from him. He...hadn't meant for that to happen. And now he was going to ruin their friendship with thoughts he had wanted to keep for himself. Yosuke would feel a torrent of feelings entering and leaving him. Multitude of voices of people telling Yu how to keep his feelings bottled inside, least they be used against him.

B-But I’m not like... weirded out by it or anything! Yosuke's voice echoes against all of that. That, oddly enough, was surprising. Yosuke had grown over the course of their adventure, but he felt so bad about it, and now he could feel his friend's pain at coming home. There was a long sigh.

"It's okay. I'm sorry for confusing you."

What could he say to that? He rubbed the back of his neck, more than a little relieved that Yu wasn't hightailing it out of here. But that still left him with being confused over the whole thing in general. But, he told himself he'd be serious about thinking his feelings over the matter so he could give Yu a solid answer.

There was one thing he couldn't help but be curious about though.

"...c-can I ask why?" Why Yosuke? Yu had way better options than him. All the girls in the team were practically ga-ga over him as much as they tried to deny it. Instead, his partner apparently thought of him as a partner-partner. But why? Self-deprecation was strong here.

He ran a hand to the back of his neck, turning a little more red than before. This was Yu as Yosuke probably had never seen him, and in an odd way, maybe it explained a little of why he hadn't spoken about it before. He replied back with a question of his own.

"Can you really know how those things go? It's hard to when 'my good friend' and 'my good friend who I like more than a friend' started." and Yu's not exactly great with it. He averts his eyes briefly. "You're fun to be around and I enjoy your company. I just knew it was best if you didn't know since...yeah."

Here they were, in the worst way possible for Yosuke to find out.

"I figured I'd grow out of it once we didn't see each other every day. But...I still haven't."

If he even thought from on iota of a second that this had been a prank, this totally squashed that idea. It was really hard to embarrass Yu, let alone get him to blush.

"I guess that's a fair question," Not that Yosuke really had any experience in it. He nodded. It was a fair reason not to tell him. "Yeah."

It hurt, but it wasn't like he could really be mad about it. It was his own fault. He always brought these things on himself. He bit his lip and took a step into Yu's field of vision. He searched out his eyes, intent on doing this without them looking away from each other.

"I'm... not saying no, you know," He said softly. "Kinda had a few weeks to think about. I just don't... have an answer for you yet so if you're... if you're okay with giving me some time, I'd like to think about some more so I could give you one that isn't, yanno, some half-assed dumb answer that you know I tend to do and stuff."

Meaning, if he's not saying no right now, it meant he was seriously thinking about his own feelings for his best friend. Something was there, he just wanted to be sure it wasn't just platonic affection for the one guy who actually gave a shit about him for more than two seconds for once.

"Yeah," he parrots back, fumbling with his hands, before adjusting the charm Yosuke had given him just as their eyes met again and he found himself wanting to sink to the floor.

"You're answers aren't dumb, you need to stop giving yourself so little credit." he replies back finally properly locking eyes with him. Frightened by the prospect. If he had time to think about it and still hadn't had an answer...he could understand but at the same time, his friendship was more important than his own heart. That's the type of person that Yu tended to be.

"It's okay if we just stay friends too...I don't want this to break out friendship." After all, Yosuke hadn't noticed before.

No, he hadn't noticed before. Yosuke hadn't even had the thought cross his mind. But that wasn't going to happen at this point. He didn't want to lose their friendship either, so: "Exactly, so I want to do this right."

Whatever that was.

So, he started with something he had wanted to do for a long time now. He reached up to take Yu's hand from that charm, holding it and gently tugging him home. Yu's hand was so much bigger now, it was weird. But it somehow still felt the same. Not that Yu and Yosuke held hands very often, but there was some things you just didn't forget.

"I give myself so little credit because I know how much of a pain in the ass I can be," He mumbled, looking at the ground as they walked. "And I don't want to be that guy anymore."

"Okay."

Whatever it was, Yu didn't know either at this point.

He didn't say anything when Yosuke too his hand, easily pushing himself up with the other to stand up. Okay, okay, he gets the message, he's coming home, despite how dizzy he currently feels with the charm and the words Yosuke have told him. Or maybe it's the hand-holding?

He can't help but smile at that comment.

"I understand." This time he wasn't going to deny what he said, if only because Yosuke was trying to be better and telling him that 'no it was fine' as much as he meant it was just gonna put a wrench in his work. "Let me help too, if you want."

His steps followed Yosuke's a little slower so that his frame could accommodate Yosuke's smaller one and his own changed legs.

"I'm sorry for running off."

"Okay," He said softly, although he didn't let go now that Yu was keeping pace with him. He was kind afraid Yu would still take off, to be honest. Even if the guy was a lot stronger than him now, so it wasn't like he could stop him. "Made me fend for myself you know. I didn't burn down the kitchen though."

He was kind of kidding. No, he really didn't burn anything, but Tataru made sure he had a meal or at least food to make one.

Funny how the way that Yu best dealt with situations was to try and add some humor to them.

"Oh. I was afraid you had."

His voice was purely dripping with sarcasm.

"I'll have to make up for it with a lot of food - well the fact I left you alone that is. I don't really want to burn the kitchen down either."

Yosuke gave Yu a look at that, even with the sarcasm. Ha-ha, ya jerk.

"Tataru dropped off some food this morning for me, she helped teach me a few things but there should be something for you to make a meal out of," He grinned up at Yu. "Otherwise, I made some extra cash so we can go shopping too."

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All I have is one last chance

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